Fever and Ice

"Every other touch runs as cold as ice, if I get too close I may pay the price."

- Remember Emilie Autumn

"Like a memory of a time gone by, many things I've seen, but I can't deny, that I remember you."

- Remember Emilie Autumn

A.N: This is a drabble "love letter" I wrote to my loved one. I hope you find meaning here for yourself. Enjoy. Also constructive critcism is always appreciated. :D

I remember the first time I talked to you. How you sussed me out, and tried to intimidate me with your cockiness and your toughness. It amused me greatly and I resisted the urge to pat your head, even though your were much taller than me.

I remember when I started to crush on you. Your cocky antics still remained but your intelligence and wit appeared as you tried to hide your bipolar mood swings. I knew I shouldn't like you- you were the badass and I appeared to be more innocent. You fascinated me and intrigued me.

I think it had something to do with your eyes- they held mysteries and I wanted to solve them. I wanted to solve you. Your eyes smouldered as if fire was beneath the surface of your irises. I wondered if I could ever gaze into them or will looking into them for too long will cause me to melt into a puddle at your feet? That night I wrote my first poem for you, when you gave me that fever.

Don't let me forget about your smile or should I say smirk. I liked your smile it made me feel special, and since I knew they are rare- I was glad to make you smile. It was the least I could do for you being such an inspiration.

I remember when I realized you were different than anyone I ever encountered. I kept writing you love poem after love poem, trying to convey my emotions into words. I'm still not sure why you are so special to me, but I think it's your deadly combination of intelligent wit, cockiness, boyish charm, sarcasm, and the fact that I find you truly beautiful. I don't think beautiful is the right way to describe you- maybe handsome in your own adorably awkward way?

I remember when I realized I loved you. It was like waking up after a very long sleep. It was like my world, which is normally many shades of grey, turned into colour. For the first time since I met you I was afraid. Afraid what you meant to me already, and afraid that I meant little to you. I was afraid for myself, that I could no longer want to run from you. I could no longer push you away for my own good and also yours. Even in my fear I knew I could no longer go back to where I was before I met you. What used to be enough for me, seems so lifeless now. All I have is hope and trust in you, and what you tell me is the truth. Even giving you that much scares me. This is madness the way I feel for you. How did this happen?

What makes you special is that I know I can't imagine a world without you in it, and I don't ever want to. Since you woken me up from my sleep- regardless if it was an accident or on purpose, I think it is only fair that you help me out.