frantic, pleading my brain to cooperate
sometimes I wonder if I'm like the scarecrow,
"if I only had a brain,"

…I do, I do, I do

I'm just scared of what you'd do to me, if you
knew that I can think, that I can reason for myself

do you think I'm pretty?

seventeen and crazy. sometimes, sometimes
I swear I'm five again,
alone,
dreaming about singing,
and wishing and praying that I'd fly
out of the shit hole I was in,

fly, fly, fly

I can fly. I can. just close my eyes,
think of happy thoughts
(sometimes, sometimes, I think of you)
but that's on a good day
most of the time I picture him in front of me;

cold shit colored eyes,
kind of like mine, but I'm nothing like him,
I'm not, I'm not, I'm not!
his nails. they're yellow, long, and dirty.
maybe that's why I bite mine.
no shirt, low jeans, and no,

he's coming for me. my heart flutters,
it starts wheezing, and panting, telling my brain,
"hurry up! react! tell my body to run! to fly!"

pitter patter,
pitter patter,
pitter patter patter,
pitter patter patter,
my heart, my heart, it's trying to run, to fly away.

peter pan had it all wrong when he said you just
have to think of of something happy. there's no reason to run
when you're okay, when there's no need to get away,
so I think of him, because he hurt me.
and that alone sends my body into a frenzy,
screaming, run! run!
but I can't, I'm stuck,
and he's coming closer, and closer,
so the only thing I can do is,

fly,

I float up to buildings, my body suspended in the air,
he's below, angry that I got away,
and I'm okay,
I'm free,
happy,

and his dirty hands didn't get me.
I'm not dirty now. I'm not ashamed anymore.

twisting, spinning, I dance with the wind,
I soar with my arms open wide,
a calm washes over me, kissing me,
caressing me, whispering,
"you got away, you got away,"

and I laugh.
fuck lucy in the sky with diamonds,

it's stephie in the sky dancing,

and I am okay,
free,
happy,

and I got away, I got away