Chapter Ten: Nameless Foetus

Grieving for you, I'm not grieving for you. Nothing real love can't undo, and though I may have lost my way, all paths lead straight to you...Halo, blinding wall between us. Melt away and leave us alone again. The humming, haunted somewhere out there. I believe our love can see us through in death. I long to be like you, lie cold in the ground like you. There's room inside for two and I'm not grieving for you, I'm coming for you. You're not alone, no matter what they told you, you're not alone. I'll be right beside you forevermore.

-"Like You" Evanescence

They took you away from me but now I'm taking you home. I will stay forever here with you, My love. The softly spoken words you gave me, even in death our love goes on. Some say I'm crazy for my love, Oh my love, but no bonds can hold me from your side, Oh my love.

-"Even in Death" Evanescence

Never thought that I'd be leaving you today. So alone and wondering why I feel this way. So wide the world. Can love remember how to get me home to you, someday?...I've found a world where love and dreams and darkness all collide. Maybe this time we can leave our broken world behind. We'll be together again. All just a dream in the end.

-"Together Again" Evanescence


To my little sister. Rest in peace.

You have never breathed on your own,
you were just a miscarried foetus.
You were even nameless
(but to me your name was Christina).

We buried you in winter
in a shoebox- just mom and I.
I tried to move on but I will
never forget (again) that
hallowed moment when
I realized my baby sister was dead.

I still wish it was me instead-
I would give my life so you could live.
Months later when I drowned
I could have sworn it was you
welcoming me into heaven.

Denied entrance at the gates
and meant to live out the rest
of my cursed existence-
marked and alone.

January- nine years since
your death (which never happened-
how can you die when you never lived?)
Christina, would you have been proud of me?
Would you have looked up to me?

Tonight, I walked through different woods
then where you were finally laid to rest
and placed a rose on the snow.
Rest in peace, love- goodbye.


A.N: Well, she would have been my half-sister, because we had different fathers. I don't think it matters, it wouldn't have changed a thing.