I have this feeling,
Deep within my mind,
That the numbness that I seek
I will soon find.

People say that loving another brings forth happiness,
But, so far, all it has brought me is pain.
People look at me and think me to be happy and carefree,
But, on the inside, my tears, they never cease to rain.

I have this hope,
Deep within my mind,
That the numbness that I need
I will soon find.

It makes me see red,
When I get out of bed,
And people expect me to be all smiles and hugs
When all I want is for all my feelings to be dead.

I have this question,
Deep within my mind.
The numbness for which I so desperately seek,
Will it I ever find?

Day after day,
I fight a constant battle,
To keep my love for him hidden from all but I,
But on my heart will my mouth tattle?

I have given up on numbness,
Deep within my mind,
But maybe, just maybe,
Numbness may my heart still find.