Title: The Best Laid Plans of Vampyre and Songbirds Often Lead to Sex (1/1)
Romance/Humor/NC-17 (for oral sex, foul language, and a dash of exhibitionism.)
A normal day for Sin is suddenly turned upside-down when his lover's raging libido strikes… again.
Time Line:
Late summer of 2530 A.S. 30 years after Reaching Souls and Joined Hands.
Sin - 530 years; Draca - 175 years; Kira - 63 years; Gwen - 90 years; Kyris - 114 years

And so the FABULOUS yaoi god said: "Let there be super-awesome man-on-man sex!" And so there was. And it was good. Unless slash/yaoi isn't your cup of tea. Then please press the back button. ^ ^

ANT-chan has fallen behind on her review replies again. As always, I'd like to first thank my muse/beta/best friend/most awesome person EVER, Seira_Kuragari. I'd secondly like to give a giant thank you (complete with a series of fangirl GLOMPS) to The Thirteenth Floor, who has kept me inspired and engaged with tons of art, RPs, and story ideas. Thank you so much, Artie! I'd like to thank my regular readers bookaholic13, StoicCrying, littleteajar, ireadtoomanybooks, Princess of Lies, Imogen Afterglow, and WalkthingThroughDreams. Thanks so much, all of you! You guys always brighten my day! I'd also like to thank my new readers XoxoSarang, Rhiwiel, yirico92, boxer, Iluv2eat, Cristallia, Sasuky4774, and Mell8. I hope you continue to enjoy my stories. Oh, before I forget: bookaholic13 asks me every once in a while if I'll be ending this series anytime soon. My answer: no. As long as this ficverse continues to amuse me, I'll keep writing. And if it hasn't faded in the six years since I started, it's not going to fade for a while. ^ ^

The Best Laid Plans of Vampyres and Songbirds Often Lead to Sex

"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."

The quiet scratching of his pen was the only sound that filled the study. It was late summer in the Haven, and the humid air was, as per usual for the season, just shy of suffocating. The Master Alchemist, Sin, had opened the wide window in order to ward off the stuffy atmosphere in the room. He had forgone his usual clothes in light of the weather, choosing a pair of light pants and a thin, sleeveless shirt instead. But despite the heat, he still worked diligently at his desk. The day was a calm and quiet one.

It set him on edge.

There was no such thing as a quiet day in his flat – not with a certain Vampyre taking residence there. The concept of silence was absolutely unheard of around Draca. The only time things got this quiet was when the infuriating idiot was planning something.

This was why Sin was working, hurrying to finish anything of importance before all hell broke loose. Said Vampyre was catching up on some much needed sleep at the moment – though how he could do it in this heat was beyond the seraph.

He had just set aside the last bit of paperwork when it happened. A speck of vivid black and violet materializing at the edge of his desk was the only warning Sin had. There was just barely a moment for him to react, shoving his chair back from the desk, before the speck became a smoky cloud before his eyes. The wisps solidified in the next instant, the familiar form of his lover appearing in the space.

Draca sat lazily on the edge of his desk, legs spread and feet balanced on the arms of Sin's chair. The seraph merely blinked up at him, vaguely wary and thoroughly unsurprised by the man's sudden appearance. The Vampyre's hand came up to smother a yawn, his spirit shifting lethargically. Sin's face was tipped up by a hand at his chin, the other man leaning forward to kiss him sleepily. Their lips slid together softly – a mere greeting – before the thief pulled away. Another brush of lips against the bridge of Sin's scarred nose and a mumbled, "Morning," followed in its wake.

Normally the half awake greeting signaled the official start of Draca's day, but today that didn't seem to be the case. Instead of vacating his perch, the man laid his head onto the Fallen One's shoulder – nuzzling into his shirt as if he were returning to slumber once more.

Sin didn't buy the charade for even a second.

"Afternoon, actually," he deadpanned.

"Shit, really? I didn't even sleep 'til sunset?" Draca's reply was muffled.


There was a brief silence.

"That can't be comfortable." The man was nearly bent double in order to sit cuddled up to the assassin like he was.

"It's not."

More silence.

An exasperated sigh left his lips. "What do you want, Vampyre?"

There was a wicked grin suddenly being pressed into his shoulder. "I thought you'd never ask." The Vampyre shifted, setting his feet back onto the floor and drawing back. Those smirking lips crashed with his, drawing him into a heated, probing kiss. A hand threaded through Sin's hair, pulling him insistently closer. The seraph inwardly rolled his eyes, though he returned the kiss with vigor.

His lover's libido was acting up… again.

And there would be no stopping him, if the heated kisses being pressed into his throat were any indication. But he didn't fight it. Sin watched with mounting lust as Draca's spirit began to twist and swirl – awash with lustful reds and mischievous gunmetal silver.

He swallowed a gasp as Draca slipped from his perch, sliding onto his knees between the chair and the desk. Sin's knees were nudged apart, the Vampyre moving to kneel between them. The hem oh his shirt was pushed up by questing hands, grinning lips doing a sinful dance down his abdomen.

"I-Impatient today, are we?" he rasped as hands moved to the waistband of his pants.

"Mmm," Draca purred up at him. "Maybe." Nimble, thieving fingers made quick work of the drawstrings, dipping inside to eagerly fondle him. Sin sank farther down into the chair, hands clenching on the arms and breath coming fast and shallow as Draca drew him out and worked him to full hardness.

The situation was – well, certainly nothing new. The thief was often prone to ambushing him (at the most opportune moments) and ravishing him breathless. But this was slightly different. He could feel Draca's calculating stare; he could sense the devious smirk being sent his way, evident in the mercurial silver Color dancing about the thief's soul. The bastard had something planned, and was obviously trying to distract him-

"Hn!" Sin barely choked back a loud moan as the Vampyre abruptly enveloped his cock with those smirking lips. He hissed instead, clenching his teeth against the needy moans building in his throat. With that wicked mouth on him – tongue roving over the head, wet heat applying the barest of teasing suction – the assassin lost his will to be suspicious. He could afford to give in…

The slamming of the front door sent a subtle vibration through the walls and floor of the study, immediately followed by the sound of someone rushing upstairs in a veritable hurricane of motion. "Heya, Sin!"

He lashed out on reflex, foot catching Draca squarely in the stomach and propelling the man away from him. There was a sharp thud and a hissed curse and the Vampyre's head collided with his desk. The lithe man's form started to blur into escaping shadows, and Sin scooted his chair forward, enough that his current state of disheveled arousal was hidden from view.

'The door, the door… how do we always forget to lock the damned door?'

That was all the time he had. Kira came bounding into his study not a moment later.

She was now age sixty-three and well into adulthood – though for a Fayth, she was still quite young. Kira had grown from an unruly, gangly teenage girl to an uncontrollable, unstoppable force of nature. She was always in motion, both physically and spiritually – her soul constantly flooding past its boundaries to touch those near her. Sin had nicknamed her Songbird many years ago, in his amusement over her ceaseless movement and curiosity.

But those who thought the young Fire Fayth to be a flighty, air-headed woman because of her ever-shifting focus were dead wrong. The quicksilver that was inherent in her very soul told the real story. Kira was a trickster, through and through. She played by no one's rules but her own, and took the greatest of pleasures in crushing those rules beneath her steal-plated boots.

She was also oddly observant for someone that was so distracted.

Sin could only pray that his face wasn't as flushed as he thought it was.

Kira turned to him in a fast, flickering movement – like the flames from which she drew power. "Hi!" she chirped with a brightly devious chuckle.

Sin forced a welcoming quirk to his lips, struggling to calm his pounding heart and the adrenaline rushing through his veins. "Good afternoon, Songbird." True to form, her soul lit up with all-consuming gold joy. Kira never did anything by halves, and it was the same when it came to her emotions.

"Sorry t'barge in like this, but I was wonderin' if I could borrow a book?" She was already making her way over to the shelves on the far side of the room. It was hard to follow her, she moved so quickly, and it was only by the grace that came with years of her martial arts training that Kira didn't run into anything.

"Sure," he replied, "take whatever you need." Truthfully, he'd rather she just leave. This situation was too embarrassing and too risky. Especially risky. His leg twitched, brushing against the too-tall man currently wedged beneath his desk.

'That fucking hurt, you know,' Draca's annoyed snarl hissed inside his mind – courtesy of his shadows.

Sin glanced down at his desk, sending a glare to the man beneath it. 'Why the hell are you still here?' he growled back mentally.

'You try manipulating shadows just after receiving a concussion, and see how well it works, yeah? I'm pretty sure the desk is cracked!'

'It's not my fault your skull is so dense.'

'You kicked me into it, you bastard!'

'Oops.' It was astounding how sarcastic that one word sounded.

A low growl echoed through his mind. 'Is it wise to mock me when I'm within easy reach of your dick?' A strangled squeak clawed up his throat as a single fingertip brushed the head of his cock in a butterfly's caress.

"Uh… Sin?" The Fallen Angel snapped back to reality. Kira had obviously heard the shameful noise he'd made, and had turned to look at him – confusion rippling through her. "You… okay?"

Oh, he was going to kill Draca. "Y-Yeah, I'm fine."

'Heh heh. Sure you are.'

The seraph didn't answer until Kira had returned to her search. 'You bastard…'

'Such an interesting sound you made!' Chills assaulted him as a finger trailed up the underside of his arousal. 'Hmmm…' A breath blown gently over his hardened flesh made it perfectly clear what the Vampyre was thinking.

'Don't. You. Dare!'

Draca wasn't listening. 'Let's see if I can get you to make any more.' A hand wrapped around him, that wicked tongue laving the head. His entire body tensed, and for a few moments Sin didn't breathe for fear of the shocked sounds he'd make. 'Stop it!' he snarled silently. There was no response from the other man. Sin fought to keep his expression neutral as devious licks traced his length – trying to focus on anything but the torture his lover was putting him through.

And then Draca took him into his mouth, and Sin had to bite the inside of his cheek to restrain the moan bubbling up his throat. He tasted blood.

'Careful, baby. Just imagine what Kira would say…' The sly telepathic message was accompanied by a gentle suck.

'B-Bastard…!' Sin struggled to keep his breathing quiet – to make it appear as if nothing was happening.

"…yeah, so, Gwen's working on some new medicine over in the Eastern Forest, but she has t'use Alchemy to enhance the plants or… something. Herbology… botany… whatever. It's not my specialty. Ya got a book she could borrow?"

In an attempt to make himself appear preoccupied with something that wasn't the Vampyre's mouth, Sin pulled his paperwork towards him and pretended to read it. "One shelf over, I think,"he murmured in reply, to ensure the strained pleasure in his voice would go unnoticed.

"Oooo, thanks!" Kira twirled over a few feet, grabbing a book at random. She flipped through the pages idly, all the while speaking to him in fast, flowing sentences. "Wow, you've got quite th' collection, doncha? Not that I understand half of what's in the fuckin' things… You're too smart for your own good, man. Huh, what's this weird diagram? Looks like a deformed anatomy of a werecat or somethin'."

Kira was always the type to carry on her own conversations. So he felt very little remorse in tuning her out. The mouth moving oh-so-teasingly over his erection was impossible to ignore. The seraph allowed a shaky breath to escape, sure that the Fire Fayth wasn't paying attention. Draca was drawing his mouth slowly along his arousal, applying just enough suction to wrack his body with shudders.

"-and you shoulda seen it! Kyris was this close to frying the bastard! His face was priceless! He was so scared he almost pissed himself. Actually, I think he might've. Draca was laughing his ass off-"

"Damned annoying idiot," the tense mutter was out of his mouth before he could stop it. A barely audible yelp followed after it as the barest scrape of fangs brushed his flesh, making him think better of the insult.


"Er, n-nothing."

'Watch it!' he growled mentally.

'No,' was Draca's smug response, 'you watch it.' The Vampyre's mouth never paused in its work, gradually teasing him closer and closer to insanity.

"Y'know, Kyris said somethin' pretty interesting this morning. Apparently, on this day exactly a century ago you came storming into her bar cursing this thief you'd met on commission – Draca. So this is kinda like yours and Draca's 100th anniversary. Cool, huh?"

His and…?

"Really?" Sin hissed through gritted teeth.

'You sneaky, conniving-'

The seraph felt Draca's lips stretch into a smirk around his cock (a thought that was much more arousing than it should have been). Silent chuckles sent the most delicious of vibrations along his length, and he was unable to completely suppress his groan. Luckily, it was quiet enough that Kira didn't hear it over her own voice.

"Yeah, crazy. And neither of you remembered? Tch. Lame." Whatever she said next, Sin didn't catch. Draca had begun trailing his mouth back up his hardness, and the smug sly air he sensed spelled nothing but trouble. Kira turned completely towards the bookshelf for a moment, allowing him to act. The assassin darted a hand below the desk to grasp Draca's head and force it back down his length before his lover let loose the loud, obscene slurp Sin knew he was about to create.

Of course, this didn't help the situation in the slightest, as Draca's startled sputters around his cock sent a spike of pleasure through him. It took all of his will not to collapse onto the desk. He wasn't going to last if this kept up.

"Oh, hey! I think I found it!"


Kira closed her long-searched for tome, tucking it under one arm. She bounded out the door and down the hall with a shouted, "Thanks a lot, Sin!" over her shoulder.

It wasn't until he heard the slamming of the front door that Sin let go.

The Fallen Angel's head hit the polished wood, letting loose the panting breaths and needy whimpers he'd been restraining. "Oh hell," he hissed as Draca's movements became bolder. His chair was pushed back, allowing the Vampyre enough room to kneel comfortably between his legs. Sin fell back in his chair, back arching and fingers tangling in Draca's wild hair.

"Finish it! Ah… god – fuck!"

The thief hummed around him, drawing another hoarse cry from his lips. His entire body was tense and trembling in pleasure – he couldn't last. And then Draca relaxed his throat, taking him in to the root and swallowing around him repeatedly.

"Ah!" White sparks clouded his vision as Sin was forced over the brink, his grip tightening (probably painfully) in the thief's hair. But Draca continued to swallow around him, milking him dry and pushing his pleasure to even higher heights.

When his lover finally released his softening length, Sin collapsed into a boneless, shivering heap in his chair. He watched through half-lidded eyes as Draca wiped the remains of his seed from his undoubtedly smirking lips with his thumb and licked it clean.

Sin's eyes narrowed into a glare. "I hate you." But despite the harsh words, his breathy voice lacked the venom to make it truthful.

Draca called him on it. "Uh-huh, sure."

"I'm going to kill you." Good, that sounded a bit more menacing.

The Vampyre barely managed to contain his snicker. "You gotta catch me first." The man leapt from the floor, sprinting for the door at top speed.

Sin chucked his pen at him. He missed, unfortunately, by mere inches. His only reward was the sound of his pen splintering against the wall, and Draca's wicked laughter fading into the distance.

"…Damn it." The seraph sighed in exasperation, hitching up his pants and leaning back to cast a brooding glare at the far wall.

His body was still trembling – both from sex and restrained fury.

"Damn it." He reached for the drawer on his right, where he kept extra pens and ink. He might as well find some more work to do until the idiotic Vampyre deemed to show his face again.

Best to strike when the man least expected it.

The assassin only got as far as pulling the drawer open, before halting. The compartment was empty.

Empty, save for a single scrap of paper, with a glowing message written in flamboyant, slanting runes and magic-infused ink:

'You work too much, baby. Take a day off for once!

Oh, and happy anniversary!


P.S.: Don't try looking for your stuff. They're probably halfway across Viranus by now. You'll get them back tomorrow.'

He… was going to fucking kill that man.

The Vampyre Draca was still snickering as he skidded from the flat, eager to take full advantage of his head start. (Really, since when did he not take full advantage of anything he was given?) The thrill of the chase and sex flooded his veins, evident in his wide, cavalier grin.

He was forced to stumble to a stop, however, when he came face-to-face with a rather annoyed Kira. Still, his grin never faltered as he took in the sight of her – rather it morphed into a wicked smirk. The two of them got along very well. Their personalities were eerily similar, after all.

Kira had grown up well. She had transformed from a gangly, awkward teen into a strong, toned woman with legs that seemed to go on for miles. She was undeniably attractive, but far from the traditional sense. Her appeal was that of a sleek animal in the wild – modest curves, long legs, skin darkened from hours of training in the sun – rather than the dainty beauty that most men sought in a woman. And her rose-hued eyes and silver hair pulled back into a messy bun gave her a hint of the exotic.

A single silver brow had developed a tick, lips drawn into a scowl, and rose eyes glaring fire at him.

Draca loved it. "Yes…?" he drawled, barely able to contain his chuckles.

Kira wordlessly thrust an old leather-bound book into his chest, momentarily winding him. It was the book she'd just taken from Sin's study. From her pocket, the martial artist drew a container of homemade lava-dust cigarettes and placed one between her lips. With a snap of her fingers, a spark of flames lit the end, and Kira inhaled deeply.

"I was asked," she began, exhaling a stream of red-tinted smoke, "to walk in and distract him so you could steal the stuff and plant the note. Not so you could test the caliber of his poker face."

The thief laughed delightedly. "True, but it was fun. How was the show, by the way?"

Kira's annoyed expression shattered, replaced with a predatory, shark-like grin that only meant trouble. "Priceless. I gotta admit, Mr. Exhibitionist, Sin's got a damned good poker face. I was almost fooled."


"Just almost. Apparently when they say you've got a talented mouth, they aren't talkin' about your ability to bullshit your way outta trouble." Rose eyes twinkles mischievously at him, sending Draca into a fit of wicked laughter.

"Crude," he managed to gasp, "but flattering."

Kira's loud, boisterous laughter joined his own.


Both went abruptly silent at the enraged howl echoing through the flat and out the open door behind them. The thief and the martial artist glanced up to the large second story window above – the study window.

"Hoo boy…" Draca whistled lowly before turning to the woman. "If a berserker assassin comes barreling past, you didn't see me. Got it?"

The Fire Fayth blinked at him in pseudo-innocence. "Vampyre? What Vampyre? Oh, Draca? Nope, sorry, haven't seen 'im since yesterday."

Draca gave her a wide grin before dissipating into shadow. "That's my girl."

Now alone and only seconds away from a run-in with a certain seraph bent on murder, Kira ran a hand through her silver hair. "Hmm… I wonder if Gwen'll wanna hear about this… heh, probably. She'll be pissed I used her as an excuse though." With another snap of her fingers, the woman, like the Vampyre, disappeared in a burst of flame.

Women need a reason to have sex. Men only need a place.

Walk on, Traveler of Worlds.

And this my friends, is the end of my smutty little oneshot. I hope you had as much fun reading it as I had writing it. X3 Drop me a line!