It didn't start out this way.

Ha! What a liar. Of course it started out this way.

Look, I'm just trying to tell a story, okay?

Yes, I understand that, but you are telling it wrong. No one wants to hear your lies.

No one wants to hear anything I say, but I don't really care.

There you go, lying again. I'm sure there's someone out there who values your thoughts. What about him?

Him? No. Well… maybe. I'm not sure, but you're getting me off subject! Darn it, where was I?

Maidenhead.

WHAT?! You can't just shout things like that out! You'll get us killed!

Why?

Because they will know we're diseased.

We? You're the only one diseased. They will find YOU strange, not I.

We'll both end up dead, nonetheless.

Whatever. Hey, when does this story start anyway?

When you hush up and let it.

I cannot hush up. I'm the main feature.

Well, let me tell our story. People might listen to me if you would shut up.

Oh, what does it matter? It's just a story, right?