Not aesthetically pleasing literature, just thoughts of a blanking mind. I'm thinking far too close to reality.


October 24, 2011

.

Dream Revelation

.

And I crawled back to her,

saying please, take me back,

and she said, you pathetic fool,

you can't choose both.

.

Why, I thought you wanted to be that,

shallow and pathetic creature,

addicted, a thrill-seeker,

do you want to live for the moment?

Or for all eternity?

.

I bowed my head low,

don't speak a useless word,

for you don't know how to use them anymore.

.

I thought of the pain and release,

the work that took me to a better place,

but momentarily,

can I keep chasing that feeling?

Can I keep chasing after something,

like a junkie after drugs?

.

It's all too scarily close to the truth.

.

But can I sit here,

as always, as I was born,

like a silenced monk,

deprived and lowered and

scrubbed clean to the bone.

Just to bow my head and

speak my apologies.

.

Is there another way?

And all the while I sat,

too afraid to stare fate in the eyes.

And so she kicked me back,

without a second to think,

a second for me to take a breath.

And she sent me down the rabbit hole.

.

I woke up to a pale blue sky,

having written my dreams the night before,

but now I saw, that the face of Fate,

was truly that of Death's.