five years ago

five years ago,
i hated who i was,
immature and naïve,
stupid and foolish.
but now,
i realize what i
once had.
the simple joys
of being young;
the happiness
of carefree days.
living without the stress,
of college,
and jobs,
and the future,
and independence,
and freedom.
without the fear,
of the unknown,
of the failure,
lingering,
in every corner.
and most importantly,
most important of all-
the friends;
the very best of friends,
close enough to kin,
through thick and thin,
always,
always,
always,
they were by my side.
and five years later,
still they stand,
right beside me.
our history made us strong,
and our ties are stronger,
and i love them still.
i may have forgotten,
how to cherish them.
i might have forgotten,
to tell them
i appreciate them.
but now i remember,
and now i will say,
to my sissy who has always,
been by my side,
through everything we've endured,
the fights we fought together,
the fights against each other,
the fun times, the sad times,
the stressed times, the happy times,
i love you and i cherish you.
and to the boy who fought
so diligently for my honor, my pride,
and my wounded heart.
the boy who has loved me,
flaws and all,
and made me feel beautiful.
the boy who can tease
and poke fun at me,
who has been there for me,
to cry and rave and vent and rant,
to my hearts' content:
i love you.
really and truly.
i've stumbled out of my void,
of feeling loveless and alone,
with a blast from the past.
how could i have forgotten
my love for my best friends
or my best friends love for me?


author's note: dedicated to AY and JM. thank you for always being there for me. i've forgotten just how much i love you guys until tonight when i stumbled upon something really, really old that made tears form in my eyes as i recalled how loyal and unwavering and caring you were to me. i wanted to express myself in the best way that i could, to tell you that i'm grateful to have you in my life. i love you AY and JM, a whole, whole lot.