(A/n: Limericks rank low in the Poetry Hall of Fame because most of them tend to be risqué. But I tried to come up with some fairly clean ones for your pleasure.)
Leprechauns were Ireland's ancient joke,
long before Saint Patrick here spoke.
So he gave us the Cross
of our Heavenly Boss,
and let us keep the playful wee folk.
To Dublin I came from County Kerry,
leaving behind the girl I'll marry.
When I've made enough money,
I'll wed my sweet honey;
and with her happily ever after I'll tarry.
There was an Irish playboy named Ryan.
Said a pretty colleen to his amorous lyin':
"I'm not one of your easy flings.
When I'm wearing angel's wings,
in Hell you'll be fryin'.
A teacher who liked students a lot,
said: "This you must be taught;
dropping out of school
is not cool.
Nor will ignorance make you hot."
Good habit's the Church taught me.
But see where sinning has brought me.
I was living highly
the life of Riley,
until Riley came home and caught me.
A Chinese martial artist named Woo
was a master of Kung-fu.
But when he saw a brawl,
he ran from it all.
'Cause he didn't want to get a boo-boo.
There was an aging lady named Sadie Fox
whose beauty and spirits were on the rocks.
Until at her friend's urgin',
she saw a cosmetic surgeon,
and he perked her up with lots of Botox.
A shapely cheerleader named Skipper
back-flipped and broke her zipper.
The Coach gave a scream
to his losing team:
"Let's win one for the stripper!"
Yes, I've lived much too fast,
thinking youth would always last.
Loving, partying, gambling.
Now I'm finished rambling.
I have no future, but what a past!
A wonderful people are the Irish.
To be with them is my wish.
They'll give you a beer,
with much good cheer.
And wearing the green is stylish.