Luck

By: Cassandra Freiborg

3/17/10

Through the darkness you lean in close.

I can taste the tequila on your breath.

Through squinted eyes you smile at me;

Ruffle my hair and chuckle to yourself.

Inebriation always did look good on you.

You toy with my scarf, mumbling.

I can barely hear the comment:

"This is a very cute scarf by the way…"

Over the sound of my heart beating recklessly.

I'm sure you've heard it by now…

And the chuckle is just your way of saying so.

I tried not to shake as you drew me closer;

Showing me those 'army moves' they taught you.

Your legs wrap around me and your arms…

Your arms wrap around my throat.

Deadly but so gently you show me how to choke a man to death.

"So you can protect yourself."

A friendly remark slurred in a whisper across my neck.

You poise yourself on my stomach, leaning in close.

Dangerously close…can you taste my anxiety?

Surely you can feel the wretched twisting in my gut.

The lights are out so you can't see my face.

I'm scarlet with the heat of being so close after so long.

A simple challenge would bridge the gap…

Bring your lips crashing down.

I only hesitate because,

Men are so simple…and intricate.

And I am afraid.

Eyes drooping you pulled me close.

The soft noise of your dog tags drawn my interest and I fiddle with them.

Whispered words in the dark…

In your arms I feel so safe and terrified.

With my palm pressed against your racing heart all I can think is…

4 am comes too soon.