A Life Update

Also please, dear god, don't get mad at me. I forgot I had left you on a cliffhanger.

So this is long overdue and I figured I would give you an explanation first. If you don't care about the life update and just want to see what's going to happen to this story, feel free to just skip to the bottom. This is pretty much a blog post.

Two years is ridiculous to not tell you anything, but there's a lot going on and at a certain point when the time since an update has grown well past what it should have been, it becomes a knot in your stomach to even do an update. But you all deserve one and the continuous about of emails, messages, and reviews I still get warrant a response. Rather than message back to each one like I had been doing, I'm just putting this up.

Life is crazy and we grow up. I was sixteen years old when I started this series. It shows. My main character is twenty-two. I'm now twenty-five going on twenty-six and the reality of how naïve I was with some of these characters is so harsh that it makes me want to scrap the whole thing and start over. The problem with writing a book chapter by chapter and putting them up for the world is that 1) It takes forever to actually write, 2) the time in between means you have time to change your mind about directions you want the story and world to go, and 3) you sometimes end up hating something you previously wrote but can't change it because it's out there. There's only so many edits you can slip in and base world facts are not them.

And there's where I'm at. Trying to figure out how to get this thing I love back on track in the direction I want, but also trying to figure out how to backtrack on things without screwing up the flow of continuity.

Then there's life.

Two years ago, we had a major death in the family and honestly, we've all been trying to deal with it since. It derailed everything. A lot of things I had written about, I now had to handle in real life. I don't handle well and as someone with anxiety and depression, that means everything gets all screwed up.

Then there's the fact that I started my first actual serious, long term relationship (all grown up now, huh). When you do that, you have to figure out how to fit someone else in your schedule, your world, pretty much everything. I moved twice and went from living with my best friend to having my own apartment again to having a house with my boyfriend. And then we got a puppy which is basically like having a small child so that was crazy.

I think I had just started my new position at work when I left. Still there in my lame office job, working 8-5 like an adult in business casual. But the biggest change has been with the other stuff. I got involved pretty heavily with our local geek/art community. I've always been a painter but I started doing more. I pretty much made my own little art business. I have art prints and paintings and jewelry I make out of my designs and go to comic conventions to sell and do local events and sell on Etsy. That takes up so much time (I actually have a convention this weekend so stress to the max).

I started up a Ladies Night event at our local comic book store and have been running those 3 times a year for over the past year. Also started up a local Geek Girl Brunch chapter, been working and helping with one of the local comic conventions in town, and then started planning art events in the community because I obviously don't have enough to do.

All in all, what I'm trying to say is I'm busy. So busy I want to cry from stress and frustration but also joy because this is working towards my career of being my own boss and being able to do what I love, make art in whatever form.

But also I'm incredibly exasperated because I can't turn this part off of my brain and I don't want to. I haven't forgotten because I live with Viola and all the characters every day of my life. I have a weird thing with music where I don't listen to the music and relate it to me, I think of it as soundtrack and always plug it into scenes in my stories, whether it's scenes I've written already or haven't. I think of Viola in different stories, scenarios, future situations, other fictional worlds, everything.

She hasn't gone anywhere for me.

So this story isn't going to die. I know these characters inside and out, which is a problem sometimes because you don't. I have to show and teach you about these characters when in my head they're concrete. And the plot details may be fluid right now and the world is still shifting around, but I'll get that straightened eventually. Though I'm giving you a heads up, rewriting Sweet Miseria is on my list. It needs a lot, lot of work before I can be proud of it again and I want it to get there. Just know there's gonna be a lot of differences between the original and newer version if I put it up here.

And I don't know when, but there will be an update to this story. I have the comic convention this weekend and then only one major event I have to run and then it's just little stuff. I can work with little stuff. Little stuff means I have time to write, hopefully. Just keep in mind, I don't know how often updates are going to come. I'm still trying to balance everything in my life so I won't make any promises.

Tl;dr Life is super duper crazy busy, I'm stupid to not tell you all anything, but I'm going to update.

I can't thank all of you enough for sticking this out, for messaging me and telling me what this story means to you and for wanting more. Honestly, I probably wouldn't have had the motivation to continue (online at least) without you.

We'll get through this hiccup, I promise.

P.S. If you want to know what I'm up to, I've got a Facebook page, website, Instagram (Business and Personal because I'm fancy), and Snapchat. All the social medias. Check the profile if you wanna follow those. When I start writing, I'll put it somewhere.

Love you.