The Book... of Dooooooooooom

A/N Just something I randomly thought of when my friend said 'a paper cut is a trees last chance at revenge'. She laughed when I told her the summary, so I might as well give it a go on here, and see how many other people laugh at this horror/ humour.

Oh, and parts of this are true, and parts aren't. You'll just have to try and separate the fact from the fiction.


Books hold many secrets. Who knows what kind of discussions have been held across its yellowed pages? Who knows how many people have stolen it, particularly if it's got monetary value?

This is the story of a book. The name of the book is The Book Of Secrets, ironically enough. And this story, like most horror stories, begins with a murder.


I ran down the street. God knows how fast I would have to run to escape this monstrosity. From behind me, I could hear screams. I resisted the urge to look around. My only thought was that if I died, would the others know what to do? I wasn't sure of the answer.

I hadn't noticed that the screams had stopped. Until I turned a corner and thundered straight into a wall of paper.

No one realises how heavy paper is. At least, not until there's the equivalent of a man crushing down on you...