I currently have one week left of my tafe holidays and I haven't even looked at any of my homework. Ugh.
I also haven't got my bedroom back. And most likely won't for a long time.
At least I have my new laptop now, it's amazing.
Last Sunday was Easter, and I had to work. I had no problem with that though. I'm not religious and I'm not really an overly people-person so I was happy to have an excuse to avoid all that smug family get-togetherness. Although after work I did go to my grandma's house, I thought it would make her feel happy, seeing as my grandad only passed away two months ago. I also saw Anthony later in the day.
Anthony kept mentioning how he went to church with his family and how great it is, and how he prayed etc. All I could do was roll my eyes. Sometimes I hate being such an opinionated person because all I wanted to do was smack him over the head and tell him to stop being so fucking naive, when we die we go underground to rot, there will be no man with a long white beard and golden gates waiting for you. But I do love him, so I chose to forget about it. As long as he knows there's no way in hell I am ever converting or will ever be foolish enough to believe in something so overly positive.
Also last Sunday I decide I am going to stop taking my heart medication tablets. Over the past number of days I have been lowering my dosages dramatically. At first it was really scary, my heart was going crazy but now it's not too bad and I actually have more energy (or maybe I just think I do?) It was a spontaneous decision but I think it's for the best. I mean, it can't honestly be healthy taking these god forsaken pills for the rest of my life, can it? Especially when they cause such horrid side effects. No I'll just have to sit and suffer with my ectopic heart beat, can't be too bad.
I need to go winter clothes shopping, but I'm lazy.
I'm continously feeling more and more annoyed with people lately. Not a particular person, just people in general. I hate. Nothing in particular, I just hate.
I hate how people think they're so important, they all put themselves on some high pedestal. People wonder why so many problems are going on in the world, are they fucking blind? Maybe stop being so selfish, and stop eating so many dead animals, if you want to reduce the green house effect, stop blaming it all on cars and vehicles. My cousin said the most stupidest thing I have ever heard the other week - "Animals create greenhouse gases, and I eat the animals which cause these gases. You don't eat animals, you eat the plants which are good for the environment and protect greenhouse gases". I could have died it was so stupid. Um hello, it's called mass production of animals, that's the problem you fuck. Anyway I'm talking about the greenhouse effect right now, which is more than a little boring.
I don't particularly like anything any more. This era is the most pointless and boring era yet. And it's only going to get worse. On Monday night I had to stay at Anthony's house. Well I didn't HAVE to, but his parents were having an Easter party so I went. Guests started arriving and I wanted nothing more than to lock myself away in his bedroom for the night and only emerge when his mum served her tuna/vegetable bake. I didn't get to hide away, but at least I got plenty of the tuna bake. I kind of just stood around tediously, sticking 'troppo' stickers that I had swiped from work on random stranger's backs. There was this weird man with a red bandana, he was the easiest target, got something like 20 stickers on his back and his bandana. Anthony's family friend's came, two girls, one girl is our age, the other one is a year younger. They're nice, but they're really loud and out there, I guess you could kind of say. At the dinner table they decided to mix coke with raw meat, a long with mustard and a mix of other rank thinks into a glass. I actually felt like yacking, I'm not sure if it's because meat disgusts me or because it was just gross in general. They wanted to play games next, this game called spotlight which is pretty much the same as hide and seek. I kind of just rolled my eyes and laid in Anthony's bed and listened to music. I checked my phone half an hour later and Anthony is messaging me that he's literally locked himself in the boot of his car. Apparently winning meant that much to him.
Anthony will be here in just over two hours. I'm cooking dinner again tonight, but I like it that way. It's a good excuse to not have to put dead animals into his food. We have to go late night grocery shopping though, which is fun (I guess you could say) because Maddington centro is so dead, it's amazingly peaceful. I think I'll make something with pasta. And maybe a side of greek salad.
The feeling of nostalgia never goes away though. I sometimes wonder if everyone else in the world feels the same. It feels as though my childhood was so much better than now and I took it all for granted. It feels like the schools I went to, my teenage life, wasn't as bad as I had made it out to be, and I wasted it all away. It feels like I was so stupid back then I did ridiculously stupid things, I've lost so many friendships over the years that I'll never get back, even though most of those people I don't find appealing what so ever, it doesn't matter.
There's one girl in particular, my cousin, who I've started to miss. When we were kids we were best friends, I guess because we were related, our genetics being so similar, we had such similar personalities and everything was one big hilarious joke. We don't talk any more and haven't in what seems like a number of years now. I'm not even sure why. I don't even know where she lives any more. I have her on my facebook but she never talks to me. The only one of my cousins, who are around my age that talks to me is Scott, and that's only when he breaks up with one of his girlfriends and no longer has a place to live, so he comes running to me for comfort. He's been living with his fat seventeen year old girlfriend who takes shockingly horrendous facebook photos of herself titled "me sexy", so obviously I haven't heard from him at all in the past 4 weeks they've been together. I'm over sticking up for him when his bohemoth girlfriends 'break his heart' after a 4 day relationship.
The other week when I stayed at Anthony's house, I was driving down his road, which is kind of on a hill slightly, and I was looking at his front yard to decide the best place to park. During this event, I didn't notice the house from his up the road had a massive white pipe sticking out onto the road, which was suppose to be used for retic or something. My car was fine, the pipe not so much. The worst part was the people who own the pipe were out the front of their house, with shocked looks on their faces. I didn't want to get out of my car, I mean, I literally just butchered their pipe. They didn't dare say anything though.
I originally started writing because I had so much more to say. So many things are irritating me about people right now. I need to create some kind of force-field, or bubble, so people and their shitness can't invade my personal space. I want to go on, but I won't.