I told this story to my two-and-a-half-year-old sister tonight, and if anyone is wondering who on Earth tells stories like this, just keep in mind that young children enjoy stories of just about any subject matter, as long as it flows and contains elements they like. As for my sister, she likes the planets, bunnies, paintings, and has a habit of memorising names that she hears regularly (say, politicians perhaps).

If you think this is ridiculous, well, just think of it as a very serious postmodern stream-of-consiousness piece.

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You know how Mercury is a rocky ball? well it's very small, so small in fact that it was carried by a bunny. The bunny and Mercury decided to journey to Saturn where they met a television who told them that a bird was going to land on Pluto. And then another bunny joined them, so the two bunnies, the television, and Mercury went to Pluto, where they found the bird that was landing and it was an eagle. They also found a Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny and a Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator.

And then the two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the Eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, and the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator decided to come back to Earth. And on Earth they met the seventh daughter of a cricket bat who wanted to find a purple ribbon. So they decided to look for the purple ribbon on Venus.

The two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat went to Venus, but the atmosphere of Venus is very smelly, so they decided to put their noses away to stop them from smelling the atmosphere. The two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat put their noses into Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, the eagle put his nose into Van Gogh's Sunflower, and the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator put his nose into Michelangelo's painting on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.

When the two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat who now had their noses in Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, Van Gogh's Sunflower, and Michelangelo's painting on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, got to Venus, they found it covered with colourful worms and green caterpillars. And then the seventh daughter of a cricket bat decided that she didn't want her nose in Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, so she put it in the green caterpillars. The green caterpillars were very hungry so they ate lots of leaves, then made a cocoon around themselves and stayed in there for more than two weeks, and then when they came out, they were beautiful butterflies!

The worms then said that a purple ribbon was inside a volcano, so the two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat who now had their noses in Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, Van Gogh's Sunflower, Michelangelo's painting on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, and the green caterpillars, went into the volcano where they found Axel from Journey to the centre of the Earth who was now journeying to the centre of Venus, and he had a purple ribbon!

So the two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat who now had their noses in Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, Van Gogh's Sunflower, Michelangelo's painting of the Sistine Chapel, and the green caterpillars, took the purple ribbon from Axel from Journey to the centre of the Earth who was now journeying to the centre of Venus, thanked him, then took their noses back from Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, Van Gogh's Sunflower, Michelangelo's painting on the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, and the green caterpillars, and decided to go to Uranus.

Now Uranus was all lopsided, so the two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat decided to hit Uranus with a really really big Chinese cabbage with eyes that looked like telephones to make Uranus not lopsided anymore. So they asked the really really big Chinese cabbage with eyes that looked like telephones if they could use it to hit Uranus to make it not lopsided any more, and it said yes, but only if the two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat could get a three headed concrete Arnold Schwarzenegger and an eight eyed jumping donkey from your bedroom!

So the two bunnies, the television, Mercury, the eagle, the Kevin Rudd Memorial Bunny, the Tony Abbott Tennis Ball Emulator, and the seventh daughter of a cricket bat came to your bedroom, got a three headed concrete Arnold Schwarzenegger and an eight eyed jumping donkey from your bedroom, and told you to go to sleep.

Goodnight :-)