it bubbles on my lips, a phrase
i made myself promise i'd never say again,
but

every time i look in his eyes, every day
i watch this develop

i feel it more strongly, fighting
inside my skin, screaming
to be let out, forcing
me to feel things i haven't felt

before.

my favorite four-letter lie
froths on my tongue, waiting for its chance
to escape from the prison
my ribs hold it in, held tight
next to my beating heart.

painful as it is, i hold it in.