Ms. Riene gave us a task. I didn't like it, but not because I hate the subject or what. It's because I have to work in a group.
Why, do you ask, I hate to work in a group? Every time my class is divided into a group, I will be the one left over. Well, that's when we were able to choose the people we will work with. When the group is chosen by the teacher and my name is on the list of one group, almost everyone in my class will start to whisper and sometimes got their sight on me. And yes, it was creepy. I really hate it when they start talking about me right behind my back.
And by that, I mean they ARE talking behind my back. They sit behind me; I sit in front of them. It seems that they don't care or don't realize that they were hurting me. And usually, they'll make protests to the teacher and say things like this:
"Let us choose our own group! I don't like the group I am in now!"
Well, that certainly shows you that they want to change groups because they don't like the people or person who was in the same group. Especially when they were seen squealing happily and accepting the group before my name shows up on the list.
And now, I'm facing the same situation. But it's a bit different; I got in one group with my... well, ex best friend. It's the second time we have to work together, the other was for Biology.
Then, everyone start to protest again.
"Miss! It's not fair! Why don't we just choose our own group?" said one of them. I winced. The person who just said that was in the same group as me. I could tell that she doesn't want to work with me.
"Why are you so picky? Everyone in this class is friends, right?" Ms. Riene gave her a confused look. The words strike on her and she got silent. But apparently her friend—who's not in the same group as mine—answers the objection Ms. Riene had given.
"Miss, Kisami's in a bad relationship with Nisha, and..." she trailed off. Thankfully Kisami's not here or she would have glared to whoever she sees first. And the 'bad relationship' Dylia—my friend, well, classmate who pointed out the 'bad relationship'—mentioned before has been occurred in the past six months. That's Kisami for you once you got her really upset.
I clenched my long, dark-blue skirt. If I'm alone, I would have cried. But no, I won't cry in front of these people. I'm an emotional girl they know, who shouts or glares at those who irritated her and not a crybaby. The one they know as an egoistic and stubborn girl.
Who, in fact, is very weak and fragile.
Ms. Riene rolled her eyes. It seems that she's either shocked or confused by the situation. And after a good two minutes, she spoke.
"Why don't we decide it like this: if one doesn't want to be in a group, then the person may find a partner who's willing to change places with him or her. You got it?" she scanned the class. Everyone nodded.
Then the bell rang, meaning it is now break time. Ms. Riene went out of the class, and everyone starting to blab about this and that about the group they're in. I couldn't stand it, so I sneak out of the class and headed to the canteen. Maybe a bar of chocolate wouldn't hurt and could make me calm a bit.
So I went to the canteen alone. Well, it's a normal view. I never got company to go to the canteen. I don't mind it anyway.
After finishing my bar of chocolate, I went back to my class only to find my name has been wiped away and I'm now on the list of the last group, which consists of those who aren't really important in the class.
Yes, my class consists of 29 students, which means if the class is divided into six groups then there will be one group only consists of four students. The last group only consists of four students, so maybe that's the reason why my name is on the group's list.
I gritted my teeth and clenched my fist. I quietly stepped my feet to the whiteboard, and then wiped my name. After that, I left the class—not even bothering to look at my classmate whose faces I don't know in what shape now.
When the bell rang once again, I half-heartedly came back to my class. Everyone's acting like nothing's wrong on me and starts to pull pranks on me. I don't care. I ignored them until the English teacher came to the class
It is now time to go home. I still have to ask one of my classmates something even if I don't want to. So I called her.
"Rusda." I tried to call her again.
I still got no answer. She keeps talking to Sarah like I don't exist. I do believe that she actually heard my voice calling her name, and is just pretending that she doesn't know I'm here.
"Rusda, you're here in front of me, right?" my voice cracked a bit. It sounds like I am going to cry but I'm not. She finally turned her face to look at me.
"Huh? Sorry, I do not realize that you're here. But if you want to ask about something, please do it later. I'm busy talking with Sarah," she grinned innocently, as if she hasn't done anything wrong with me. Oh well. Busy, huh? Yeah, you're busy because you're talking about the new gossip about one of our classmates.
Tired of it, I left her. Taking my backpack with me, I walked out of the class. I'm ignored again.
Yeah. Being ignored is one of my routines in school.
No wonder why I always got the feeling that I'm not accepted in this class.
Well, it seems that my love for angst is the main reason why I wrote this. It didn't turn out so well, though. Please let me know if I made mistakes in grammar or others so I could fix it as fast as I could. Sorry for the creepy-ness, my bad.