For the past five years, we have all been through some freaky shit. How this happens, we dont know and we dont care to explain. It just does. But this one tops the cake for us all. Or least for me and some of the guys.
This little event began late one summer night in August. There wasnt much to do at the time. So, Richard, Kurotio, and I just hung around near the woods, sipping beer. Nothing special, really. (Hey, not like Noiz would care. Shes got paperwork, grades, and her family to deal with. That cats not going to care if a teacher and two students are going to be out in the woods, drinking beers. Get off me!) Anyway, the boys and I were drinking beers when we heard a low moan in the grass. Richard paused for a moment. I looked over at the ronin.
What is it, Rich? I asked.
I thought I heard something in the grass, he said. I chuckled a bit at him.
You must have been drinking too much, I brushed up. Richard shook his head.
No, he said. Listen. Kurotio and I listened closely. Another low groan flooded our ears. This time, we all took notice.
What is that? Kurotio asked.
Dont know, I whispered. We listened on closely. A third moan followed close behind. I looked over to the thick trees.
Its coming from that way, I whispered. I stood up and walked in that direction with the guys following behind me. We ended up going down a steep hill to a stream. We all looked around for the source of the sounds. Just inches below us, lied what looked like a young girl on an abandoned futon. Fifteen to seventeen years old, give or take. Skinny little thing in a snow white kimono. The blood red obi kept her clothes held together. No shoes and her hair was loose all around her. She looked drunk in her own pleasure. Kurotio looked on in hunger. Richard and I tried to look away due to the fact that we could see through kimono. With no underwear, no less. This girl happened to look up and see us. She had a stoned like a hyena look on her face.
Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! this child called up to us. The three of us just stared at her looking as if we had just walked in on an old lady about to take a shower. (Well, Richard and I did. Kurotio was just hungry for her. Man-whore demon! He just wants to screw anything with tits.) The girl pouted at us.
Im lonely and bored! she complained in a horny way. Play with me! Kurotio grinned at that offer.
Yes maam! he yelled. That demon just leapt down to her and climbed on top. Richard and I just stayed there, watching. The girl looked up at us.
What about your friends, daddy? she asked the man-whore. Kurotio grinned at her.
Ask them, he said. Rich and I looked on in discomfort. Nice going, genius. The little whore directed her eyes up at us.
Come and play with us! she pleaded. Rich and I shook our heads.
No, were good! Rich said. I shook my head. Im not going to jail for rape. Hell to the no! The girl pouted at us.
Aw come on, she whimpered. Itll be fun! Kurotio kissed her on the lips hard.
Nah, forget about them, he said. Im going to take you to another dimension. This little whore smirked at the demon man-whore.
Oh really? she challenged him.
Yeah, he said.
Okay, this little whore said. Show me! The demon grinned at her. He looked out to the stream ahead of her. Kurotio looked down at his one-night wife.
Wait here, he said. She and we watched as he flew over to the water and reached inside. Rich leaned in to my ear.
Whats he doing? he whispered. I only shrugged at my drinking buddy. Kurotio turned back to the girl with a wiggling fish in his hand. This was no little fish, either. That crazy bastard had somehow pulled out a mud shark. Or was it an eel? I didnt know; I didnt get a good view of that that thing he was holding. The girl didnt seem to mind. She was just up for anything. Kurotio licked his lips at her.
Up for a little seafood? he asked.
Uh-huh, the girl said.
Good, the randy demon replied. Because Ive got the catch of the day for you right here! Richard turned to me with a glue white face. I didnt even blink at him.
Yes Rich? I asked. The poor guy couldnt even part his lips to utter a word at first.
Dont tell me hes going to he yelped. Rich and I turned back to view below. He whipped around back to me.
Oh god, he is! he yelled. For Richards sake, I wont go into heavy detail. But, just Google in Led Zeppelin shark episode. Yeah, that bad.
Now, details about this incident vary, depending on who you ask in the academy. Noiz does not believe any of it.
Uh-huh, she told us in fact. Were you guys drunk?
We have some drinks, I explained. But we werent drunk. Our charming boss didnt seem to buy it.
Right she mumbled. But, it did happen. Really, it did! I swear, I swear. Theres evil video tape of the whole event. I dont know what happened to the tape. Maybe, its on EBay or something. I dont know. Thats all about my freaky-ass adventure for that night.
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