Lucas sat alone under a gazebo as it rained heavily around him… His green eyes peered into the nights sky as if trying to find the answers to the questions that seemed to be stuck in his head. But yet, he still came up empty… He looked down at his thin, boney, wrists, seeing the fresh crimson lines that covered them… He would have to make it a point to cover them, so no questions would be asked…

Pulling down his hoodie sleeve he took I a deep breath…. He just wanted to forget about everything that had happened so far tonight.….

"I swear to god, you are the most useless person in the fucking world!" His mother screamed throwing a lamp at him.

"Mom I'm sorry!" He cried, dodging the lamp. "I've been sick, so my check wasn't all that big."

"Kick his ass ma!" His older step brother Matt yelled throwing down his empty pipe. "He's fucking sorry"

"He IS sorry…" She threw her ash trey at him. "You better fucking go out there, and find me what the FUCK I want or I'll show you just how FUCKING sorry you're going to be!"

"But mom, I, I don't have any money to…"

"Well then… You fucking figure it out!"

He hated when it would come to this… When 'you figure it out' meant anything, even if it meant letting some old cracked out drug dealer have his way with him….

Lucas undid his studded belt as he stood in front of his mother's dealer… His flat, pale stomach soon grew a shadow over it as the large man walked closer to him.

"You know what boy…" He smiled placing his cold sweaty hands on Lucas' hips. "I always hate it when your mother or you has the money… I much rather just have this instead."

With that said, Lucas closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable… Feeling the mans hands, traveling down his flat stomach, to the top of his boxers.

Lucas shivered at the thought of what happened next… He hated himself for it… What made it worst was the fact that he was the only one in his house that didn't do any drugs…Yet he always found himself in that situation when either his check was already spent, or money was tight…. When he did what he had to, he quickly went home to give his mother and brother the drugs, but not before a slew of insults were hurled at him.

"Fucking whore!" His mother screamed snatching the bag from him. "You dirty fucking SLUT!"

"What can you expect from a fucking fruit like Luke huh?" Matt asked. "I can tell you like this though… You better get your faggy ass out my fucking face before I show you something that really fucking hurts…"

That's when Lucas came to the park….. This was his only release from that hell hole he called a home… That was until the meth and crack his mother and brother had just gotten kicked in to effect…. Then that was a wonderland,… No one would have guessed that just a few hours before hand, his mother wanted to stab him, and his brother wanted to out right kill him….

The rain slowly started to ease up, and with it letting up, he decided he'd head home… By now everything should have kicked in… Granted all the hatred that was there before the drug, may have somewhat faded, some of it would still be there, but, he knew that if he didn't at least stay a few hours, the next binge would be 10 times worst, and knowing his brother's strength when he needs a fix, it could mean hospitalization, which meant not being able to go to work, which equals up to no money…

He walked home, hoping that he wouldn't have to deal with too much anger… When he walked through the door he saw his mother sitting on the couch, along with his brother… Both seemed to be pretty euphoric, which meant that at least tonight he could get some sleep…

"Lucas…" His mother looked over at him. "Where have you been?"

He stared back at her, trying to mask all the fear he had. "I… I went for a walk mom…"

"Oh… Okay…. You know I hate you out late…" She lit her cigarette. "Well…" She inhaled. "Go ahead and get to bed…"

"Yes ma'am…"

He walked down the hall and into his room…. What he managed to get from the dealer would be enough for his mother's mood not to change for about a week… Well at least he had hopped….