There are some things even death can't prepare you for.

It wasn't an easy one, either. Fell asleep at the wheel, crashed into a semi. Quite the wake-up call, let me tell you. I'd been in such a rush all day, to work and to school and even to the bar, and for what? To end up crumpled between the steering wheel and the driver's seat, far closer now than they ought to be. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. There was no escaping this.

The worst of it was that I'd never gotten to tell Rachel goodbye.

Oh, we'd kissed, but it was a quick peck of a thing, hardly even worth mentioning, and instead of saying "Love you, bye," I'd said "Got to run, I'm already late". And she'd smiled and she'd waved but I could tell she was disappointed, and that left me more numb than shock ever could.

I found myself aching for one more chance, one more opportunity to see those vivid blue eyes and caress her flushed cheeks. (She was shy and quick to embarrass, always had been, but she was so cute when she was nervous that I couldn't help but take advantage of it from time to time. No one blushes quite like a redhead.)

The world faded into monotone shades of gray, then black.

I woke up gasping.

I couldn't work out where I was, at first. It was dark, ominously so. All I knew was that I was naked and tangled in fabric. I sat up in a whirl, clutching at my stomach, my chest, and then at the bed as I realized I wasn't trapped in that horrid little car, I was... I was home. In my own room, in my own bed. Rachel lay there beside me.

She rolled over, only half-conscious, and mumbled, "Bad dream?"

I ran a hand through my hair, then over my face. It didn't make sense, none of it made any sense, and it had happened, hadn't it? It had felt so real.... She wrapped an arm around me and pulled close, and all I could do was mutter, "Yeah. Very." My voice sounded strange in my ears, deeper, more resonant. Then I realized that Rachel was naked under the sheets as well, and the tone and timbre of my voice suddenly seemed far less important.

"Relax. It was just a nightmare." She pulled me back down so that I was lying beside her and rubbed one of her hands against my chest, soothing and warm. "I'm here. You're safe." I pulled her close and kissed her deeply once, then again, and our legs intertwined as I moved from her lips to her ear to her neck. She gave a happy little moan and curled her toes. "Frisky tonight, are we?"

"I missed you."

"What are you on about? We've been together all day."

I buried my face in her hair and nuzzled her shoulder. "Aren't I allowed to miss my fiance?"

She pulled away then, hints of a frown tugging at her face. "Girlfriend."

"What?"

"Girlfriend, Alex. We've been over this. I'm just not ready to commit at that level."

...That wasn't my name.

Alex was, in fact, the name of my best friend since third grade. I'd introduced him to Rachel the week after we started dating, and had been pleased that the two of them hit it off so well. I'd devoted so much time to Rachel, I'd thought we were meant for each other, and now... this.

I pushed Rachel away and stood up, then fumbled for the lamp's switch. My hands were shaking so violently it took four tries to activate it. Our clothes were lying in a heap on the floor, presumably discarded in the throes of passion. I lunged for my pants and pulled them on hastily. Rachel followed me as I stormed out of the bedroom, confusion clearly evident on her features.

"Wait, where are you going, what's the matter?"

I turned and glared down at her, my expression a mask of calculated rage. "How long?"

"What?"

"How long have you been seeing him?"

"I don't know what you're--"

"Answer me, Rachel!"

Tears burst unbidden to her eyes. "You're the only one I'm seeing, I promise! There isn't anybody else, Alex!"

"Stop calling me that!" She tried to touch me, but I pulled away. "I thought you loved me. I thought you were special. And here you are, cheating on me with my best friend like a cheap two-dollar whore--"

Rachel's tears stopped. Her gaze turned to ice. "Get out."

The swiftness of the change caught me off-guard. "Rachel, I--"

"Get out of my house!" She ushered me to the front door, unlocked it, and jabbed a finger into my chest. "You have no right to treat me like this! Not after what I've lost." She shoved me out onto the front porch. "Don't ever talk to me that way again." She punctuated her statement with the door's slam. I stood there for a full minute, shell-shocked by the intensity of Rachel's declaration and the discovery that the wan reflection in the curtained window was not my own.

My breath caught in Alex's throat. A single tear trickled down his cheek.

The world faded into monotone shades of gray, then black.

"...I love you, Rachel. Goodbye."