He's inside me, and he's slapping me in the face again and again, and I am feeling about a thousand things at once.
"Why do I do this, slut?" He asks. Then He hits me again.
I cannot possibly begin to answer, all I can do is moan.
"Because I can. I can do anything I want, right bitch?"
I gasp a shaky, "Yes sir."
"Does it matter what you want?"
"N-no sir," I manage to stutter.
"That's right, because I know what you need, I'm the only one who knows what you need." He hits me again. "Nobody else has the balls to slap you in the face, do they, whore?"
The full parade of my past sexual partners dances through my head and He's right – none of them could make me feel like this, not even for a second.
I hate that. I don't want Him to be right.
But its hard to be too worried about that now as he's slamming into me and pleasure and pain mix in their strange way to create an absolutely overwhelming feeling.
He grabs a fistful of my hair and holds my head up, so I can see him entering me. "Watch, bitch. Nobody else makes you watch, do they?"
Words have left me, He's still talking but I'm not really paying attention to the language, just the sound of His voice, feeling it cut through me. I'm at once very present in this moment and very much some place else entirely.
A little while later, I'm lying on my back on the bed, breathing, eyes shut, pretty much unable to move.
"Are you okay?" He asks.
"Amazing," I whisper. Not really an answer, but I think He will get the idea.
He pats my leg. "Good."
"Thank you sir." I know He loves when I say that.
"You sure are shaking." I open my eyes and look down at my own body, and sure enough, I can see myself shaking. "Its okay. Relax. Catch your breath." He opens his arms to me and I happily cuddle up to Him.
I think about what He said earlier, about telling Shani He "enjoys her company." I asked him why such a comment was a bad thing. He told me, "I feel great when I'm with you. That's how I want to feel. That's a whole different thing than enjoying somebody's company. If you told me you enjoyed my company, I would be showing you to the door. You don't enjoy my company – that's so fucking tame and boring."
Lying against Him, still fairly out of breath, I whisper, "I don't enjoy your company one bit."
"You need this, don't you bitch?"
I am on my hands and knees and He's spanking me again and again.
"Yes sir, I need it." He's right, that is the only way to describe it, I need it.
"You need more, don't you?"
"Yes sir, I need more."
"Of course you do."
I hear Him moving things around, opening a drawer. I concentrate on breathing, resisting the urge to turn around and see what He is doing.
I feel something whip against my ass, so hard, it curls all the way around to the front of my thing, pain shoots through me and I collapse forward onto my elbows, face buried in the pillow. It hurt so much more than the belt, so much more than anything.
I do not have much time to process, He whips me again. Stop, stop, no more, I scream in my head. I feel like wimp. I concentrate on breathing.
Three. Four Five. I count in my head each time He hits me with….what? I want to ask but I am too scared. Six. I feel the pillow wet with my tears. Seven.
"Tell me you want more."
No no. No more. I can't take any more. Please no more.
I'm quiet for too long. He repeats his command.
"More please, sir."
Its nice waking up next to Him. Watching Him lie there, so peacefully asleep. Its funny how He doesn't really look like much of anything, just young and innocent. I shift my weight, and suddenly everything hurts. He did that? The idea seems laughable right now. I consider the possibility of waking him up with a blowjob, but decide against it – I know better than to act without His permission..
He wakes up soon enough, greeting me with, "Good morning slut, give me a blowjob." I'm all too happy to comply. He continues to lie in bed afterwards, and I head to the bathroom to wash my face.
As I move past Him, He glances my body over and chuckles. "I really did a number on you last night."
When I get to the bathroom, I look in the mirror, and can't help but smile perversely as I see all the fresh bruises on my body. Fuck, that's hot.