For anyone who bothered to click the link and... read this, this will be a compilation of drabbles from my characters, some already having stories of their own story and some who may only have this time to shine. Most likely, it will never be marked 'complete' because there will always be someone with something they need to tell me and thus, you. Mainly they will stand alone but there may be some cases where they connect or characters speak to each other within the series and breaking of the forth wall may occur. Please ignore my insanity, and of course, enjoy.
This time around will be Davie. His story is currently untitled [NN1, as I have many], and he is one of the male leads.
I don't think I want to do this anymore.
I mean, honestly, I don't think I can.
I have watched for years as my best friend has grown up. I have grown beside her. I have vowed to protect her, help her, love her.
And I have. I've done all that and more.
But I can't do it anymore. Not because I don't want to. Never that.
But because in doing everything that I have done, I have hurt her. Multiple times, in multiple ways, but most of all, I have stunted her growth as a person.
I don't know what to do to make it right. I don't know if I can.
Sabotage, threats, assault, murder... nothing is beneath me, if it's for her sake.
Lila is everything to me. For my mother, her mother to tell me that I can't do anything about it yet, I've been pushed too far.
Stretched too tight and I am snapping.
I've never been able to sit back and watch another male approach her. No, it fills me with incredible jealousy.
Insecure? Maybe I am. Mm, I definitely am.
I know that right now I am a constant in her life. Her buddy. Her best friend.
She doesn't see the way I look at her as different because I have always looked at her this way and always will.
But Lila doesn't look at me the way I look at her. Lila does not want me - she doesn't want anyone! And that is my folly.
She's well aware of love, of romance, of relationships - we are teens after all. I have thoroughly squashed anyone who even showed a passing interest in her.
Even after I transfered schools, the ghost of my ah, my overprotectiveness remains. She was never able to escape me.
And yes, I am well aware I sound crazy. Obsessed. I'm not.
If I were, I wouldn't be able to let her go. I don't want to, sure, but my faults, my flaws, mistakes.
I can't stay here and hurt her this way. It hurts me too.
It hurts me that she's never desired anything - anyone.
Sure, it's possible that she'll never want me. I know that.
Will it kill me? Yes. And I honestly mean that. One day she just may break my heart and end my life. You might think I'm being a stupid teenager, over indulging in angst, but I'm not.
I love her. It's my purpose in life, my only purpose. I have known this from the moment her parents brought her home from the hospital. Sure I was only two or three, but I knew that this was it for me, even I didn't quite know what it was. I remember demanding to hold the crying, screaming bundle, upset because she was upset and because I didn't have her yet. Carefully, cautiously, she was placed in my arms and she stopped. The feeling of completion I felt then remains every time I get to hold her, stronger then ever. It's all I'm surviving on and that's just barely enough.
Take that away from me and I die.
Maybe I'm already dead and just reliving all my time with her in a constant loop.
No. Lila is too real. This emotion is too real.
And as long as I have to stand by her in silence, in this guise - I will not be able to do it.
They won't all be pure narration, I hope. Already, I've got several ideas. Minor, secondary, supporting characters: they all want their moment in the spotlight. I'll try my best to get them their 15 minutes. The main characters want a place to complain as well.
Only time will tell.