Week One.


Uh…right. Hi.

So anyway, I guess I have to start writing in you now, you know; because it's an assignment for English. My teacher, Miss Ryan, decided that we had to write at least twice a week in these books that she gave us until the end of term. Coz you know, we won't be here next year so she can get away with reading all our dirty little secrets and not have to face us and stuff. If that makes sense. Which it probably doesn't. And yes, Miss Ryan, I am fully aware that you are probably reading this right now. Oh well, I'm probably gone by now, so I don't have to worry about you anymore. Bleh.

Right, anyway, um…so, my name is Ellen Schroeder, I'm 17 and my birthday is June 21st. Uh…I have shoulder length brown hair and brown eyes. My mum says they look like melted chocolate, I say they look like shit, literally. Uh…you didn't read that Miss, I swear. Wait…why the hell am I describing myself to a book? You don't need it, and Miss Ryan knows what I look like, so I am seriously confused. Maybe I've gone crazy, just like my dad says? Ehem.

Anyways um…this assignment seriously sucks. What the hell are we meant to write in these things? 'Oh my gosh, I am soooo in love with the school jock, Luke'? As if! He's not even that hot, seriously. And yet my best friend, Catherine is like, completely obsessed with him. But then, she also talks to guys that have dumped her, hurt her, and then jumped up and down on her heart using a spiked pogo stick. She's crazy.

Ooh! Dinner! Well, whatever. I reckon this is enough for one day. See you later, book. Diary. Whatever.

That's it. The next time I write in you, you are getting a name.

See you.




Well, technically afternoon, but hey. I can say whatever I want as a greeting. And who knows, Miss Ryan might read this entry in the morning, so it works dammit! And I'm fully aware that's not how you spell it, but it's my diary/assignment thingy, so I will spell things how I want.

I have a name for you, book! I have decided to call you Alex, because it can be either a male or female name and, well, you're a book. You don't have a gender.

So. I have decided when I'm going to write in you. I'm going to write in you…(dramatic pause lol)…whenever I have English! Well, on the days I have English, after school and work and stuff, because I seriously don't want anyone to read what I write in here. Other than Miss Ryan, obviously. Though I'm a bit iffy about letting her read it too. Why are we doing this assignment again?

Oh, here it is. My task sheet. Uh… 'to explore yourselves and the world around you'…blah blah blah. Boring!

So, I told Catherine that I have to keep a diary for my English assignment today and you know what she did? She laughed at me! And then she went on to talk about how her class was doing marketing and ad stuff. Like, she gets to make these posters that deal with a social issue like drunk driving or teenage pregnancy. That sounds a lot more fun than doing a diary! I hope you change the course next year, Miss Ryan. And I know you're reading this, dammit!

So uh…oh yeah! Today I just got asked out by this guy I know, Jordan. He is so funny and cool! And we're like, totally going on a date this Saturday, to see a movie. SQUEAL! I am sooo excited, I can't wait! Just two more days, and then I get to go out with Jordan, and it's going to be so much fun! I think Jordan might be 'the one'. You know…the ONE one. V-wise. I am not going to write it because well, that's just weird. Hello! Teacher reading this? Uh-uh. No way.

Have your own fantasies.

…Whoops. Why do I write in pen? And we were specifically forbidden from using whiteout, or ripping pages out, or scribbling words out unless they were spelt wrong, which means that even if I did scribble that sentence out I would have to write another one which looked similar and I totally can't think of one right now and, oh my god, she is going to kill me.

Calm down Ellen. Breathe. Breathing is of the good.

So, this is a long entry. But then, we do have an entire book to try and fill.

You know, I just realised something. She gave us out such really nice books, covered in fake leather and with pretty stuff and everything. We even got to choose our own design and latches and stuff! I wonder why she did that though – it would have cost HEAPS more than she should technically be giving out to students. And mine has a proper buckle and neat stitching, and cream pages (I love cream pages, they are so cool) and everything.


Hmm…I dunno. Hah! Another word that is spelt wrong! Eat that, Miss Ryan! Uh…please don't kill me.

I have work tomorrow so I won't be writing until I'm about to go to bed. Stupid late shifts. And, I'm going to go now. See you later, Alex. And Miss Ryan. Um…




Work was a bitch. I'm not apologising for that one.

I work at McDonalds. Okay, lame, I know, but it was available when I went for it last year, and I can't be bothered going for a new job just yet. But yeah, I spent most of my time running around, cleaning, cooking and serving people. I barely got any rest! Not to mention that today at school I had PE, where we played tennis, Drama, where we played a whole bunch of games, English, where we read books and talked a lot, and then Art where I was running around getting materials and stuff for my sculpture that I'm making. Some of those things were heavy! It's going to weigh a TON when I'm done with it.

Anyway, now I'm really tired, so I'm just going to take a shower and crash. Night.



Okay, I know today is Saturday and therefore I don't have school and stuff, but I totally need to write this!

I went on my date with Jordan, you know, funny cool guy, the One. Well, we saw the movie The Sorcerers Apprentice, which was totally awesome and had some really cool scenes and funny moments in it. Then we went and had lunch downstairs at (surprise surprise) McDonalds. That was cool though, coz my friends at work could totally tell I was on a date and were like really happy for me (or as happy as they could be coughMichellecough). And we had fun eating and laughing and talking with each other. Then we were walking around Grand Central, and suddenly this girl appears!

Turns out Jordan's a royal Bastard. He was going out with this chick, Amanda, from St Ursula's, but because she wasn't 'giving him any' he decided to go for another girl, AT THE SAME TIME! Guess who the Lucky girl was? You guessed it, me. So then I turned on him and joined Amanda's side, and then he totally just snaps and says that we're probably lesbian with each other! What the Hell? Needless to say, he stomped off, thoroughly dumped by the both of us, and I spent the rest of the afternoon talking with Amanda about how much of a jerk he is and stuff.

It also turns out that Amanda is really cool. Once we got off the topic of Jordan and onto other stuff, we found out that we have tons in common. Like, she loves romance books and 'forbidden love' as much as I do! And she gets fuzzy whenever she drinks to much orange soft drink, like me. Luckily, we both stuck to coke and donuts. And she loved the movie Inception as much as I did, along with Sherlock Holmes, and Valentines Day, and all those other ones! And she loves listening to love songs and country. I love them too, but I also love heavy metal, which she hates, while she loves rap, which I hate. So we're not complete clones of each other, personality-wise.

So yeah. I found out that Jordan's a jerk, Amanda's really cool, and Sorcerers Apprentice is a really good movie. Amanda and I decided to get together and go bowling some day with a few of her friends and a few of my friends, to see if we can all hang out and stuff later on. Maybe during the Christmas holidays, coz school looks like it'll be really busy and stuff.

Well, that's my day. Uh…I'd ask how yours was but, well, you're a book. You don't have any bad days or good days. Are you even conscious? Like, do you have your own feelings like a plant and stuff, or are you just these bits of dead stuff that I use more dead stuff to write in and stuff? And I use the word stuff WAY too much.

Wow. Another long entry. At this rate, I'll have this book filled in no time.

I'll write later, Alex.