ONESHOT. " ever feel third-wheelish around them?" "Just a bit, yeah." "Do you want to feel third-wheelish together?" "...Wouldn't that just make us a separate pair of wheels?" He smiles, "Exactly."
Review, please.

Third Wheel-ish


"But...but I-I loved him!" she wails, wiping her wet face against my damp sweatshirt sleeve. "H-how could he just break up with me like that?!"

I sigh, "I don't know Megs." I hesitantly rub her back. I should do that right? Right. Yeah. Totally. "He has no idea what he just lost..."

I must admit, I wasn't used to comforting my friends in such situations. I've only known Meagan for a little over a year, and until a couple months ago she was perfectly okay with being boyfriend-less. I mean, she was boyfriend-less then. Hell, I'm perfectly okay with being boyfriend-less. Absolutely.

She sniffed, giving me a watery smile, "You are just so lucky to be single Cam."

"Yeah... Sure."

"I mean look at you! You're so careless! You don't even try to look nice everyday! I remember when I could repeat outfits that many times..." I offhandedly look at my apparel, sniffing the neckline of my hoodie. "And you're even ALLOWED to pull off messy buns... I could barely handle walking outside in pajama pants when I was going out with him! I bet you even eat anything you want!" She pokes at my stomach.


"But," Meg starts tearing up again, biting her lip, "I guess I have to get used to that life style again... because it's not like I have anyone to impress anymore... It's not like I don't have to try to smell nice anymore!...It's not like my boyfriend didn't just dump me!"

Curling up into a ball, she goes back to sobbing hysterically, choking on her own spit in the process before finally excusing herself to go to the bathroom and vomit.

"Poor kid..." I mutter, "I never liked that motherfucker she went out with anyways..."

One Week Ago.

"So explain to me again, why do I have to go?"

Meagan teases her hair, pulling it up into a high pony tail. "I thought you wanted to meet him," she answers, expertly shoving twenty different sized bobby pins into her hair.

"Yeah," I say from her bed, "But I was thinking more of an off-handed 'Oh hey, you're Meg's boyfriend. Don't make me kill you. I'm Cameron, her bestest buddy-buddy, by the way,' sort of thing at the movies or something, and then I could leave and be done with it." I glare at her reflection in her vanity mirror, "I wasn't expecting to be dragged off into a date with you guys..."

"It's the biggest date we've had so far Cam," she sighs dreamily, turning around with her newly made-up face. "We're just going upstate to the new amusement park, and I want you to be there with me. Besides, I said you could invite Ian or something so you wouldn't feel third-wheelish."

I frown thinking of my other best friend. "I told you. Ian, that stupid butt hole, decided to break his toe playing soccer barefoot last week. So no, he can't go. Oh, and guess what? I'm feeling third-wheelish."

Meg changes into a different tank top, tilting her head while debating on which pair of sunglasses to wear. "Why didn't you invite someone else?"

I narrow my eyes. "Because I don't have any other friends."

"Uh, then make some."

"I don't want to," I say stubbornly. "I can barely handle you and Ian."

There's a knock on the front door, and I already know who it is from Meagan's sudden girlish squeals and quick make up check. "It's Adam! He's so punctual! It's exactly 8:30—"

"Just open the door for him Megs..."

Skipping across her apartment, I follow her silently. She has trouble remembering which way the lock on her door has to turn in order to unlock it, but after a few frantic tries, she manages to open the door for him.

"Adam!" She giggles, kissing him on the lips, "You're here!"

"Hey babe," he chuckles, returning the kiss. Adam looks over towards me shortly, "Baby, are you and your friend ready?"

I want to barf. This isn't the first time I've talked to the guy. No; a few nights ago, Meagan was sincere enough to invite me into a three-way conversation via phone. For an entire hour, I listened to coos and "adorable" compliments about each other, while I resorted to talking to myself and reminisced about what I had for breakfast that morning. And not only that, but he straight up said I sound like an eleven year old on crack. The eff with that... But I swear to God, if I ever hear the name "boo" or "hunny bunny" or "babe" one more time, I will sucker punch their faces. I'll let it slide this time though... I mean, Meg is in the room.

But I was never very fond of pet-names. They're mushy. And gross.

I feel a sharp pain in my side from Meagan. "What?" I hiss grumpily.

"This is Cameron, Adam. And she is very happy to meet you." She pointedly glares daggers at me, gritting her teeth. Then reassuring my civility, she nudges my side again.

"Hi, Adam..."

"Oh yeah! Babe talks about you all the time! You guys are pretty close aren't you?" He inquires.

I look over towards Meg, nearly cringing from glancing at her all-too-dreamy look. I sigh, "Yeah. We are. I talked to you on the phone, remember?"

"Right! Right, right, right..." Adam nods, "That was you the other night. Cameron. Like Cameron Diaz."

Blowing a strand of hair out of my face, I cross my arms over my chest. "Not really."

Meg coughs, seemingly out of her earlier trance. "Cam's a very special individual. I doubt anyone is like her!" She leans over and gives Adam a kiss on the cheek.

"Ah." He nods again, and I can't help but think of him as a stupid bobble head. "That's beast."



Throughout the entire two hour long ride, I bitterly note that neither Adam or Meg are even paying attention me. So in an almost suffocating sense of deja vu, I sit still for the entire ride in the back seat. However, I mostly pay attention outside my window, going through the wonders of life like, "Oh. I wonder who mows the grass growing on the sides of highways," or "Whoever painted the road recently did a dashing job..." And when I'm really in need of fun, I let myself listen in on their conversation and count how many times Adam uses "that's beast" or "babe" in a sentence. Boy. What. Fun.

When Adam finally decides on a parking space, I rush outside to stretch my legs, desperately wanting to get out of his godforsaken car.

"Okay ladies," he begins after reaching for his sunglasses, "Baby are you ready? Cam?"


"Ohmigod! I'm so super excited Adam! Aren't you Cam?!"


"That's beast," he smiles toothily.

I start to wonder if he ever really knows what he's talking about.

"Just hold on for a sec girls," he lowers his sunglasses from the bridge of his nose, "I want to make sure we know where we're parked."

Meg and I nod, sitting on the hood of his car. Curiously, I poke Meagan's shoulder, but she just smiles and swats my hand away, going back to texting probably Ian. I can honestly say I've never seen her this happy before, which is unsettling to me because Meg is already the happiest person I've ever met. I don't even think I could last being happy all the time.

" we're parked in section C of the parking lot...and I guess we can remember that because Cameron's here... And her name starts with the letter C..." Hearing my name, I quirk an eyebrow towards Adam, who is busy squinting at the parking labels. "So C72...C for Cameron's name, and seven minus two is five...and when I was five, my hockey jersey's number was twenty-seven...I'm pretty sure at least... And twenty-seven is basically a flipped seventy-two...So Cameron—twenty-seven-but-not-twenty-seven..."

I sigh. Adam looks almost in pain trying to find a quick memorization technique for a letter and two separate numbers.

Running a hand down my face, I fix the messy bun on top of my head, and reach inside Meg's purse for a sharpie. "Hey Adam!"

Surprised, he turns around. "Uh, what?"

"Here," I take the energy to jump off the hood of his car and walk the three feet towards him. Then, taking his hand grudgingly, I write in big fat handwriting C72. "There you go. I didn't want to stay in this parking lot for the remainder of the day. No need to thank me." I innocently pat his back.

Adam pouts, "Well...I already thought my way of remembering was pretty beast..."

"Well..." I mock, rolling my eyes, "You should be glad I didn't write it on your forehead. I'm about a foot shorter than you though, so I decided not to. Lucky you." Walking to the amusement park entrance, I make a large hand gesture in the air, "Hurry up! Come on Meg!"

Stuffing my hands in my shorts' pockets, I pretend I can't hear Meg talk.

"It's okay babe...Cam's only like that sometimes. She, uh, grows on you eventually..."

We reach the line to the park entrance, where I have to patiently wait up front by myself so Meg could check in her purse. That, and because she couldn't possible stay away from Adam for even ten stupid minutes. So I'm waiting alone and fanning myself with a park map until they get in.

It's really hot out, I think offhandedly, increasing the speed of my fanning map. The park is much too crowded for my taste and I know the lines for rides are going to be ridiculously long. Just standing here, there are already too many people pressing and cramping into spaces, while trying to look for their rampaging kids running everyw—

"Oof!" My breath wooshes out of me when someone rams their elbow into my chest.

"Oh my god! I am so sorry!" The elbow-rammer quickly steps back and fumbles with whatever he has in his hands, "Are you okay?"

I hold out my index finger, motioning him to wait a moment and let me breathe. Rubbing the sore spot, I nod, "I'm good..."

He nods back, "Yeah. I really am sorry though. Uh, I'm kind of running late to work, so I was running in and you were just, um, standing there..." He speaks quickly, pulling out a red clip on tie and adjusting it on his tacky yellow shirt. Then, using his other hand to turn on the radio attached to his back belt loop, he pins on his name tag. "Er, not that you're not allowed to stand there. I just didn't see you, well, standing...there." He eyes the spot at my feet comically.

I laugh, "Well..." Leaning towards him, I read his name tag against the glare of the sunlight, "Elliot, I hope you get to work on time. But I should go see if my friend is done checking in her bag." I motion towards a crowd surrounding security.

"Right." He smiles, running a hand through his hair, then flattening it back down again. "Well, enjoy the park!"

I wave back, before looking for Meg's bright blonde hair in the crowd. "Meg and Meg's lover boy! Over here!"

The two said people turn their heads. Meg rolls her eyes, tugging on Adam's hand. "Sorry we took a while Cam. Adam knows a few people who work here and we met one of them working at the information booth aaaand..." She dramatically shoves three rectangular pieces of paper into my face. "Look! We got free fast passes!"

"Isn't it beast?!"

"Cool." Truthfully, I'm actually very grateful. I honestly love roller coasters, but waiting in line for hours isn't worth a thirty second ride. So I'd much prefer waiting in the quick ten to fifteen minute line than the outrageous ninety. "Who did you know at the information booth?"

Meg and Adam share a look. He smiles sheepishly, "Actually, it was one of my ex girlfriends. We're still friends though...she's pretty beast."

"Yeah," Meg adds, rubbing Adam's arm. "Jennifer seemed really nice."

"Ah. I see," I answer curtly, pausing. "...Did you know the name 'Jennifer' comes from the Latin word 'jenefia' which means 'unfortunate female'?"

Adam frowns, "No...?"

I purse my lips together, holding back a smirk. Very unfortunate female. "Of course you didn't." I give Meg a knowing look, then actually smirking when she returns it with a glare. "So...Where do you guys want to go first?" We start moving away from the park entrance.

"Well...lets see." Meagan looks at her watch then takes out her own map of the park, fingering certain spots on its key, "We could ride then eat, or eat then ride...I mean, it's already a quarter to twelve, it's practically lunch time. Are you guys hungry yet?"

I peer over her shoulder to find where we are. Pointing to a cafe close by, I tap against the map. "We could eat at this mermaid themed place, it actually looks really cute... and we can try out all the water rides before we eat," I add thoughtfully, "Y'know, since they're on our way... Then, I guess we can shop around The Pirate's Cove for a bit before going on the bigger roller coasters." I finish, circling my finger around the small picture.

"That sounds like a pretty beast plan to me."

I try not to grind on my teeth too much.



"Ha! I am so soaked!"

"That was so beast man!"


I follow Meg and Adam towards the next water ride. It confuses me though. Why were all these wet rides neighbors? They're practically cramped in one block out of the entire park. It's not very practical, I think. Shouldn't some of them be scattered in different nooks through the whole area? The park is full of hot sweaty people walking around and waiting in lines, I'd figure that some people would want a nice spritz close by rather than having to walk back to the other side of the park.

But a spritz was practically all these rides were. I haven't gotten incredibly wet on any of them. We've been going through short-cut lines and strapping ourselves up in boat-looking things for nearly an hour, and only will it be after this last ride, "Tsunami Splash", have we decided to go eat. Yet the only "un-dry" thing about me seems to be my butt from sitting in a wet seat and a little bit of my sleeve when some kid shot me with a squirt gun. But regardless, no matter what cute word play they use in the ride's name, like—I don't know—"splash" or "rapids", I don't get wet. Disappointed? Yes.

"Come on Cam! This one's supposed to be really wet!" Meg shouts a few yards ahead of me.

I smile, walking just a little bit faster. "Yeah, yeah..."

We get to the end of the fast line, and I'm surprised to find the line unusually long.

"Whoa. Babe, look at this. This ride has to be beast... look how long it is." Adam points, from where he's standing behind Meg and I.

I nod absentmindedly. I feel so bad for people without fast passes. This place is hotter than balls and I'm already impatient waiting at the end of this line. I must say though, Adam, that schmuck, earns at least some brownie points for getting us these passes. If any.

"Ugh," Meg starts, relieving the sudden silence. "Look how drenched I am." She motions towards her tank top and hair, playfully squeezing the damp fabric for a greater effect. "Hurricane Tower was awesome. We HAVE to go back by the end of the day.

Her boyfriend wraps an arm around her, "Totally babe. I'm starving though... I can't wait til we get to that cafe."

I watch awkwardly as they connect hands and make goopy eyes at each other. When they start swapping spit in front of me though, I put my foot down.

"Right." I cough, grateful when the break apart for a bit. "So, uh, Adam...yeah, er, what do you like"

His eyes brighten up, and I swear, if all he's going to say is "Food is so beast", I'm going to snap his throat and never let him eat again. Yeah. That's it.

"I'm actually really psyched to try out the park's turkey legs," he grins, "Everyone seems to be walkin' around eating them. One of my friends say they're pretty beast too." He pulls Meg closer to his side, and she smiles back up to him.

"Oh. That's, uh, cool." I attempt, noticing Meg's strong encouragement from the corner of my eye. "I actually don't eat turkey legs."

Adam's face literally drops. "What?!" He exclaims, nearly flinging Meg over the line's railing. "Are you insane?! You haven't fully experienced a park day without carrying around a turkey leg! I could finish off three and that shit's HUGE! Cam, no offense but—What the hell is wrong with you?! Do you eat your cotton candy sugar free?! PLAIN candiless apples on a stick?! Funnel cakes without the CAKE?!—"

It seems that I've offended the boy. Ha ha.

"Um, hunny bear..." Meg pats his arm reassuringly, "Cam just doesn't eat turkey legs. She's a vegetarian."

"Oh," he flushes, "That's beast..."

"If you say so."

I roll my eyes and tap my fingers against the railing. Meg's shooting me a look I can't understand. Ok. No, that's a lie; I think I do. She's starting to get pissed at me because I keep pwning her lover boy with everything I say. It's not my fault though. She should know that, right? I'm looking out for her. This guy is a douche bag seasoned with dumb ass and kissed on a jerk-faced grill. And I don't like him... What the hell could have attracted her to this thing? He's obviously not that smart, his attempts at humor aren't funny at all, his clothes are tacky with their stupid metallic fabric on his black t-shirts, and...and...well, I bet there's a bunch of other things wrong with him. having a teeny wiener. Ew.

"Cam, stop being a bitch..." Meg hisses in my ear, pulling me away for a moment with a hand on her hip. "Adam thinks you hate him."

"Hey now," I hold up my hands innocently, "I didn't say anything about hating him. Am I getting close to it? Almost... But if he pretends not to be himself for the rest of the day, I might mellow out for a bit."

I smile bitterly at her. She's barely even talked to me today. What's her problem? Why is she blaming me for being cranky about this? Meg's practically ignoring me on this day trip after she forced me to come with her. She can't possibly be mad at me. Brushing her off, we end up waiting for another ten minutes or so before we get to the front of the line.

"How many?"

"Two..." Meagan sneers.

Fine. Be that way Megs. "THREE," I cough.

The man in charge of managing the line gives us a confused look, but he points to the specific marks on the ground where he wants us to stand and tells us to wait for the next open raft anyways.

We lead ourselves into another tragedy-themed room, touched with little "tsunami warning" signs. Cute, I think absentmindedly. The rest of the line meshes with the original line, and the three of us have to squeeze behind a group of probably middle school girls.

Leaning over the railing, I count how many rafts it would probably take before we could go on. I sigh, this damn ride better be good. Meagan is already too distracted with Adam wanting to stick his hands in her shorts, which I pretend not to notice. I do, however, appreciate the line moving, and very soon we're only two rafts away from the front.

"Omigosh! He is so totally cute!" I catch one of the girls whispering in front of us, "I wonder if he's noticed that we've been on this ride more than six times Kelly..." Another one of them snickers and nudges her in the side.

"Shut's barely lunch time, and my mom's picking us up at eight—"

"Hi girls."

One of the makes a strange gurgling noise after the other shuts up. "Um. Sup."

I barely notice Meg and Adam sucking faces. Barely. So instead, I opt to laugh with myself at their situation. Poor girls. I bet out of all four of them, one of them is bound to be a Jennifer...

"So... do you suddenly have another friend? Or did I miscount the other times and there's actually five at you?"

I notice he—this middle school attracting man—is pointing at me, but my lips twitch upward after seeing such a familiar face. "Oh hey! You got to work on time!"

The younger girls are shrinking away when Elliot seems to recognize me as well and waves back at me. He laughs, "Pfft. Nah. I actually didn't...I got here ten minutes late, but someone covered for me, so it's all good." He opens the safety gate into an open raft and lets the group of girls inside. "...Are you with them?"

I chuckle dryly, just because I wasn't even friends with these sort of girls when I was in school. "No. I'm stuck with these two..." I motion behind me with my thumb to Meg and her lover boy, probably whispering sweet nothings into each other's ears. Blech

"Adam? Meg?"

"Hold on—you know Meg and lover boy?!"

He thins his lips, "Yeah...Did you just call Adam—"

"Ellie! I totally forgot you work here!"

I groan, maybe I do need to start making new friends for myself. Instinctively, I look over at Elliot who's being hugged by my best friend. Adam, however, quickly butts himself in and they bump fists and exchange other forms of greeting. I suddenly feel left out.

"Meg, I told you that you are never to call me that stupid nickname..."

But like the gosh darn wonderful friend I know her as, she rolls her eyes and says in a thickly sweet voice, "Ellie, this is Cameron. She's a good friend of mine."

"Cool," he offers a mock salute, "We've already met though. I ran into her on my way to work."

"Literally," I add, but it seems that it ended up being pointless effort seeing as Meg and Adam are suddenly re-distracting themselves in each other's presence. Damn.

"Don't you think they're gross sometimes?" Elliot's making a disgusted face and turns away from the kiddies.

I'm glowing, "YES! I totally want to barf!" I feel comfortable as he laughs for good measure. "I've been walking around and going on ride after water ride with these two, and I'm not even kidding! We seriously went on all of them..."

"Really? You went on all of them?" Elliot looks surprised.

"Yeah. It took forever."

"Wait." He looks down at my clothes suspiciously, "But you're not wet."

I follow, fully noticing my dry attire compared to Meagan's and Adam's. "Oh. Yeah. I must be lucky... I didn't bring a bathing suit or any clothes to change into."

Elliot flashes me a cheeky smile and pats my back. "Well then," he begins, "I'll make sure you get very wet on this ride then..."

I'm not sure whether it's from hearing Ian say too many "That's what she said" jokes in front of Meg and I, or if I just have no idea what else to say...or maybe I'm suddenly very embarrassed for not getting soaked compared to everyone else. Yeah. That' it. Because I'm suddenly stuttering and trying to find a good come back from the hallows of my mind. Which is odd to me because I've never even reached the hallows of my mind. Hell, it wasn't even that great of a comeback...

"Have fun Cameron." He's still smiling when he opens the little gate to our ride.

I blush, grinning back sheepishly. Then, stepping into the raft and strapping myself into the seat, I wait, waving back until he's out of our sight and nudge Meagan's shin with my foot. "How do you guys know Elliot?... And why did I not?"

Meg looks thoughtful biting her lip, but her eyes suddenly grow big and her lips part. "Oh. My. God."

"Uh," Adam's looking at her as well, and I can tell that he's not used to her spacing out either. Hm. "Elliot's one of my buds. I've known him since we were tiny. He normally works at the three-point basketball game though... The one on the other side of the park... but he did say he was getting a promotion."

My eyebrows fly above my hair line. Sniffing the air in the dark tunnel we are still floating in, I scrunch up my face and point to the little bits of chewed soggy food left unceremoniously on the other side of our raft and the murky water we are floating on. " a promotion?"

"Well, yeah..." He trails off. "We haven't gotten to the carnival game section of the park though... but this is pretty beast compared to his last job. Elliot can't shoot a three pointer to save his life either. Isn't that right babe?" he leans towards Meg.

"Oh. My. God." She repeats again, ignoring him. Meg starts making weird hand motions and opening and closing her mouth, making her look very much like a fish. "You made nice, Cam! You got along with Ellie!"

"Huh? How do you know? You were too busy—" And then our raft swoops itself into a steep plunge, hitting the water and going under a huge wave. And I am thoroughly soaked all the way into my underpants in the least perverse way possible.

Present Time.

Meg, in her dramatically tragic state, chooses to migrate all of her stuffed animals from her bedroom to the couch on the other side of her apartment. Insisting that the extra company will make her feel better in the long run since she is feeling lonelier by the minute. Why thanks Meg, it's great to know that me being here is very productive. That's just great.

"So you know what he says?!" she sniffs, clutching onto an overly stuffed panda. "H-he says that...that we were spending t-too much time together! And I just don't GET IT because I totally th-thought that—" Then the rest of her monologue I can't understand since she decides to explode into another fit of tears.

I try rubbing her back again, since, y'know, that works... God I suck. "Meg...Meg? It's, uh, okay...It's going to be okay..." I bite my lip wondering what I should say. "Just tell me what you want me to do Megs. Do you want me to get you some more ice cream? Cause I can do that. Do you want to list all the dumb ass things he did? Cause I can really do that..."

"N-no, I'm fine." She pats away my hand and attempts a watery smile, before giving up and breathing heavily. "I-it's just...WHY AM I SUCH A LOSER CAM?! WHY? WHY? WHY?"

I decide to leave her alone for another few minutes, hesitantly inching towards the bathroom. Sighing, I pull out my phone and press speed dial number five, hoping that moron picks up.


"Ian!" I bark into the receiver, "You've left me here all alone with her! You promised me you wouldn't leave me alone with her while she's a maniac!"

"Oh...It's just you," is his groggy reply. "Look Cam, I'm really tired...and my leg is aching..."

"Oh shut it Ian," I'm almost growling. Damn. I've been listening to her go on and on about Adam, and it's almost more agonizing than having to listen to her go on and on when Adam's here. "You totally left me on their stupid 'date' last week with the same reason. It's NOT my fault that you're a dumbass and decided to break your toe, then play soccer WITH your cast on the other day. And it's not like I'm going to push you down the stairs! I just need your help!" I lower my voice, cradling the phone to my ear, "Meg's starting to scare me..."

"Cam...I really don't think—"


I'm nearly snarling into the phone. That bum. He knows that neither of us are good at comforting or breakups. The two of us combined would at least be acceptable.

"Cam?!" Meg's crying from the living room, "Don't leave me Cam! WHERE DID YOU GO?!"

I sigh, "Thanks for being a total loser Ian. I'll call you back in a little..." Biting my lip, I press the end button to my call and sit on the bathroom floor for a moment. Hesitantly, I have another thought in mind. After a minute passes, I flip open my phone again and hastily text a quick message and press send.

It's not that I don't want to be here for Meagan. I love her. She's like my little sister, and she deserves better then the crappy friend scenario I've been giving her all day. She's supposed to be the most compassionate out of the three of us, and it sucks when I have to see her so sad. Man, when I first met her, I thought she could shit rainbows with how nice she was to everyone. Now, all she seems to be doing today is stuffing her face in ramen noodles.

Getting up, I brush off my jeans and open the door, only to be thrown back by a tight hug. "Cam! Please don't leave yet!"

"I won't..." I hug her in return. "I think Ian might come around later though..." Douche. He better.

"Okay..." she heaves, "You're the best Cam..."

I nod and lead her back to the couch, where I let her continue on her rant about how unfairly Adam crushed her heart and soul. In the middle of a very detailed explanation of a certain escapade that she insists "might have lead up to their breakup", I have to interrupt her when there's soft zzzzzzzuzzing sounds coming from my pants.

Fingering the buttons of my phone to unlock, my lips twitch upwards looking at the home screen.

1 New Message from Elliot

One Week Ago continued...

Stupid long line, being all huge and twisty. Stupid eighth grade boys behind me, thinking they're the shit and they own the place. Stupid couple making out in front of me. Wait. No. That's Adam and Meagan. Damn.

"It'll be totally fine Adam..."

"Babe, you know I really don't like roller coasters..."

"But Cam loves them, and she really wants to try them out."

"...Can she even get on these rides babe? She is kind of short."

"I'm pretty sure she can..."

There are more awkward smacking noises coming from the two of them, and all I can do is give them my best stink eye. Screw it. I hate this loser and I hope he falls off the highest fucking hill on this roller coaster.

Still feeling rather uncomfortable, I shift my weight between my feet and urge myself not to pick the wedgie forming in my shorts. I can't believe I'm still drenched from that last ride. It figures too, during lunch, Meg insisted that we eat outside so that I could dry off. It's not like they weren't wet either! So Adam gets his stupid turkey leg—which is a ridiculous size for one person, by the way. Meg gets to giggle her head away with the milkshake that she and Adam shared. Me? Well, I lost my appetite a while back.

Anyways, we're all standing in a new line, and I'm trying to tame a monster wedgie and my damp hair at the same time. I'm hungry now, and I'm trying to see if there's a way to kill Adam without Meg knowing. Hell, we aren't even in the fast pass lane! We're actually in the flippin' two-hour-wait line! So instead of standing for ten minutes as I've planned to do all day, Adam insists that we should stay the entire wait.

I ask Meg why he chooses to do so. I really did.

She replies, "Well, Adam-buns was kind of nervous to get on this ride... so I thought it'd be best to give him enough time to collect himself."

So this is really all your fault Meg. All. Your. Fault.

"Die." I mutter other profanities to myself, while therapeutically clenching my fists and occasionally punching my open palm. Yeah. That'll teach them.

"Hey Cameron! ...Uh...You okay?"

I look towards my right and find Elliot standing a few yards away. I wave immediately, happy to see him. He's dressed differently and no longer wearing that clip on tie or name tag of the sorts, but either way, I find him jogging towards my direction and finally ducking underneath the railing and at my side.

"Um," I glance behind me, rediscovering the group of pubescent boys behind me making loud farting noises, "Wasn't that cheating?"

"Cameron," Elliot smiles cheekily, "I work here. I'm allowed to butt in line, and here I thought you'd be happy to see me." He pauses thoughtfully. "I mean, you are kind of alone with...them." Elliot waggles his eyebrows and motions over to where Meg and Adam have resumed their works of PDA.

I make a disgusted face, which Elliot mirrors. "Right... Uh, I thought you were working?"

"Lunch break."

"Cool." Curious, I twiddle my thumbs, "...For how long?"

He grins, "An hour." Elliot pats the back pocket of his shorts for his phone and explains how he texted Meg earlier and asked her where we were. "...So I figured I could catch up to you guys."

I notice he smiles a lot, and it's hard for me not to smile myself. So I do.

"You have a nice smile."

I raise an eyebrow while holding back a blush. He's lying. I know this. Whenever I smile, my eyes squint, making them look like curved slits, and my nose widens across my face. I have a suckish smile. It's true.

I recollect myself after a second and keep a straight face. "Er, If you say so."

Fortunately, the line starts moving again, and I have time to recover from sudden compliment giving. Was I supposed to tell him he has a nice smile too? He does. I guess. Damn. It's too late now though, I've waited too long.

"So, um, you're friends with Adam?" Good. This is good Cam. Pep talk it up.

He nods, "Oh yeah. Since forever. I'm kind of glad that he's going out with Meg though. Even though the two of them are horny enough to fill a co-ed gym class, but you gotta do what you gotta do I suppose." He crosses his eyebrows, almost as if he wants to reword his sentence. Aw. He ignores it nevertheless. "I mean she's smart and she's pretty. And she's nice. His last few girlfriends were a pain in the ass." Elliot pauses, looking directly at me, "She also has pretty friends."

I turn away briefly to hide the blush tinting my cheeks. "Um. Yeah." Silence follows after, and once again, I mentally punch myself in the face for my lack of flirting skills.

Elliot seems to notice this as well, and decides to continue on with his own story. "I actually met them on their first date."

Curious, I ask, "Do you work somewhere else too?"

He chuckles bitterly, "Ha. No." Elliot rolls his eyes, "It was so awful. Adam invited me on their date last minute. I couldn't find anyone else to go with me though, and man, you really should have seen him. I mean, I know he's not great with first impressions—" Really. "—but Adam was so insanely nervous that night, and it came to the point where I just wanted him to stop bouncing on his heels. So I went. And I have no idea why Meg stuck around, but I'm glad that she did."

Another moment passes before he lets out another dry laugh, "But it seriously was the worst date ever. I ended up leaving about halfway into the movie we were watching."

I sigh, "I know what you mean. I so wish I could leave right now. My friend Ian bailed to be my park buddy for the day, and Meg really wanted me to come. The only reason I can't drive home is because Adam's actually my ride back..."

He smiles, "They're very good at making people feel like third wheels."

"Yes." I groan, leaning over the railing, we just reached the very front of the line. "Just a bit. Yeah."

"Well then," Elliot takes me by the hand and leads us to the very back row of the roller coaster. I grin because the back row is the best seat in the house. The idea of being whipped around as the caboose on a roller coaster is just the ultimate park thrill, no matter what those lame front-row worshipers want to think. "I guess we'll just have to feel third-wheelish together."

Buckling myself into my seat, I laugh, "Wouldn't that just make us a separate pair of wheels?"

The roller coaster has a count down; it's the kind where there isn't a climb up a steep hill, but more of a similar process to yanking back a rubber band and letting it soar. As the last few numbers reach the board, Elliot takes my hand and lifts it up in the air.


Present Time.

The two of us actually ended up abandoning Adam and Meagan for the day, or at least until Elliot had to clock back into work. After our roller coaster ride, Meg insisted we go have fun on our own because Adam needed to buy a new pair of shorts.

He peed in his pants. I still laugh about it.

But Elliot and I have been talking nonstop since last week, and he's visited Meg and I once or twice in the past few days. He's just so wonderfully adorable.

1 New Message From Elliot

I smile and press view.

You're lovely Cam, I mean it. Stop worrying, I'm already driving down. Day off. See you in 10.

Now I think I could pee in my pants.

Elliot's coming, Meagan's throwing up again, Ian's most likely coming if he still WANTS that leg healed, Elliots COMING, and apparently I'm lovely. Aw.

What had I texted him again? Oh. That's right...



I cringe, scooting closer towards Meagan. "Do you need anything Meg?"

"...Can we go out tonight? To a club maybe?" Meg sniffs and wipes her face with her sleeve.

I really don't feel like going out tonight, and I especially don't feel like going out tonight with a desperate Meg. She's not a very nice drunk and will actually claw at people's eyes when angry enough. "Um, I don't think that's such a good idea Meg," I say slowly, "What if... Well, what if we see Adam there? Uh, doesn't he like, er, clubbing?"

She frowns, flinching a bit, "Why doesn't anybody love me, Cam?"

"I love you."

"You don't count!" She snaps, burying her head in a pillow.

There's a knock on the front door as my hand hovers over Meagan's back, wondering whether or not I should touch her. Sighing, I get up from the couch and dash towards the door, flinging it open.

"Ian! Oh! And you brought—" I smile, wanting to hug him. Ian scoots a little to the left of the doorway using his crutches, and immediately my face falls. I glare, pointing menacingly at him, "You." Tugging Ian inside so fast he nearly falls over, I snarl, "This is all your fault," and slam the door.

"Cam? Is someone here?" Meagan calls from the living room.

"Ian!" I hiss, pulling on his shirt so he could get down to my height, "What the fuck are you thinking, bringing him over here?!"

"I can explain—"

"NO. Y'can't. Because you're a bumtard who decides to do the exact OPPOSITE of anything anyone tells you!"

"I needed a ride over here!"


"Well MAYBE if SOMEONE didn't pressure me to come over here so fast I wouldn't have asked him!—"

"Shut up Ian!" I poke at his chest, "What were you thinking?!—"

"YOU shut up!"


"Look," he sighs, "The guy had been wandering around the perimeter of my apartment building for hours and—"

"Moron. I also live in that apartment building. Maybe the fucktard just wanted to talk to me! Why would you let him drive you over here?!—"

"Would you LISTEN to me woman?!" Ian groans, rubbing his temple with one hand and leaning against his crutches, "And actually, he says you're quite scary."

"Cam? Is that Ian?" Meg calls again.

Cursing, I push Ian towards the living room, ignoring his protests and excuses about his broken leg. Wimp.

"Ow! C'mon Cam!" he whines, nearly tripping over his crutches. "I needed a ride and he wanted to talk to her!" Ian winces as his broken leg hits the couch, "And isn't it a law or something that you shouldn't drive in an unsafe manner?!"

"Shut up, before I drive you into an unsafe manner."

I push Ian onto the couch next to Meg who was curled up into a fetal position."Now, COMFORT HER."

"Ian!" she cheers, reaching her arms out to him, asking for a hug.

He obliges and scoots towards her, cradling her head, "Hey Megs, how've you been?"


"Ah." Rubbing her back, he watches as she gives him a watery smile, "It'll be okay. I know he feels awful about it probably wants to talk to you." Ian turns and gives me a pointed look that Meg doesn't catch. "He's probably just waiting outside your front door somewhere. Wondering if he could get a chance. Because I KNOW he's a decent guy."

"Psh." I snort, "How do you even know him?"

"I met him a few months ago when Meg invited me to go ice skating."

I pause, "WHAT? Why did EVERYONE get to physically meet your lamo boyfriend before me?! I'm the girl best friend!"

I turn towards Meg and realize that her eyes just grew ten times their normal size. She stutters before pushing herself off of Ian's chest, "A-Adam's here?! WAIT. Don't let him come in yet! I need to put on some makeup!"

"Aw, fuck."

Ian smirks, putting his hands up, "Hey, it's not like I said anything."

"Oh just be quiet."

What's the point anymore? Defeated, I make my way through Meg's apartment and reopen the door. Adam is slumped against the wall outside, his head in his hands, and looking quite hopeless. Was it bad that looking at him kind of made me smile? I've realized I'm somewhat malicious. Somewhat.

Standing over him was a confused Elliot, holding a small bouquet of flowers and trying to comfort his friend. Ha. I know the feeling.

"Elliot, hey! You're here" I smile cheerfully, waving at him and letting him inside.



"Uh," I scratch the back of my head, "Adam, I think you can come in. Meg definitely won't kill you, Ian's got a broken leg and I think he's quite fond of you or something..." I notice he's lifted up his head and is watching me carefully through bloodshot eyes, "And I won't try to kill you either. Jeeze."

Slowly, he gets up from the floor and does some weird dance to try and get through the door without touching me or Elliot. What a bumtard.

Turning on my heel, I try to lighten up. "Hey. Thanks for coming."

"No prob," Elliot grins, fingering his bouquet, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I guess," I sigh, leaning against the door. "It's been... odd. Today's just been odd. I think Meg has a higher level of emotions than the average woman."

Chuckling, Elliot offers me a hug which I happily agree to. "You look exhausted."

That's awesome. "Thanks."

"I got you these," he suddenly says very quickly, shoving his flowers in between us.

Laughing, I say sarcastically, "Really? I thought they were for Adam." Taking the flowers towards the kitchen to give them a vase, I motion for Elliot to follow. "They're really pretty though. Thank you."

"You're welcome. I came up the elevator though and found Adam like that outside," he bit his lower lip, "He looked really shitty. I've never seem him act like that over a girl."

I have trouble reaching for a glass vase on the upper shelf, and Elliot smirks, easily grabbing it for me. "Thanks," I mutter.

"Does Meg look shitty?"

"Only the shittiest."

"I'm really tired just listening to them," he explains, watching me arrange the flowers into the vase. "It's either something so awesome about the other, or something really terrible. I'm sick of it. Aren't you?" Elliot doesn't wait for a reply, "I'm either dragged onto a date and ignored that entire night, or ranted to. I just want to forget them and their problems for once, y'know?"

I nod.

"And then there's you," His mouth curves upwards. "We should go out tonight."

Uh. What? I wipe my palms against my jeans. "I don't know... Do you really think that's a good idea? I just haven't had a boyfriend in forever. I'm too aggressive, too blunt, too judgmental, too sarcastic..."

"Cam, I've known you for a week and I already know that you go way past all those things. You're funny, and smart, and you're really cute when you're angry. You're lovely."

"See, now I just think you're desperate for a positive answer."

"It's merely the truth Cam." He grins nervously, "So, o lovely one, is this a yes?"

I blush, "Okay." He's suddenly very close to me and I can hear his heart beating. Or maybe it's mine. Closing my eyes, I feel his warm breath and wrapping my arms around his neck. For a near perfect second his lips brush against mine.

Suddenly there's a crash in the other room. "I didn't do it! I promise!"

Groaning, I grab onto Elliot's hand. "Who's that?"

"Ian." Turning around the corner, I find Ian innocently watching tv with his leg propped on some pillows. Huh. "What happened?"

"How am I supposed to know?" Ian pouts, "You practically broke my leg again after I tripped over Meg's couch and—Who are you?"

"That's Elliot. We're going out later."

"Ooh. Can I come?"

"Definitely not."

Ian starts to get up using one of his crutches. He wobbles a bit and Elliot helps him up. He's way too nice. I feel antsy noticing that Meagan's room is closed and there's another crashing noise coming from the inside. Hesitantly, my fist hovers over the door, wondering whether or not I should knock. Deciding against it, I twist the knob and fling the door open. Oh god. This is gross.

"Well... take a gander at that," Ian's smirking and waggling his eyebrows suggestively. Dick. I punch him lightly in the arm and snicker as he loses his balance.

A chair is toppled over, a lamp's broken, and a few clothing items are not where they're supposed to be. Adam's lifting Meg, holding her butt, and her legs are wrapped around his waist. Her shirt's off, revealing her pink and green froggy bra, and Adam's buckle was undone. Her arms were snaked around his neck, fingers tangled in his hair, and their tongues were making too many slurping noises. They're just so... intertwined.

"That deserves a good vomiting," I say, shutting the door.

"They reminded me of pretzels..." Ian, you're a tard.

Elliot's making an equally disgusted face, "That was... disturbing. I think I lost some of my innocence seeing that. Just. Ugh. Ew."

I laugh. Ian's chuckling as well, probably not for the same reason, but he makes his way back to whatever he was watching in the living room. "I feel like that was way too anticlimactic. I thought Meg was going to overfeed herself with ice cream and kill me with her stuffed animals today."

"Yeah... And I almost thought Adam was going to kill himself. Huh. It's funny how that works."

I make another face. "Maybe we should seek revenge and invite them to one of our dates..." I suggest jokingly. Almost immediately, I start to have sudden flashes of Elliot and I silently eating pizza and avoiding any eye contact, while Meg and Adam feed each other with their mouths and play footsie.

He gives me a knowing smirk, and I chuckle awkwardly, "Maybe not..."

"Yeah. We really shouldn't."

No offense to any Jennifers in the world. I promise :)