A/n: Okay, so this is taken from yet another roleplay. Don't worry, I'll get a story on here soon that is written entirely by me and only me. This one is cowritten by Infestation of Vitality on Gaiaonline.

Title: I'm divorced, not dead

Rating: T - M ; M only due to language.


It had been a long twelve years of pointless fights and making up. But catching her husband in the act of an affair had been the ultimate betrayal. What made things worse was that it had been such a cliche. A man of his mid to late thirties in bed with a twenty something year old who was still wet behind the ears. With her family and friends looking at her like she was the one that did something wrong. Well, technically she did..in their eyes. A divorce was looked down upon, especially at her age. They whispered behind her back who would want her?

Well someone hasn't abandon her, her best friend who has been there through thick and thin. The only thing wrong here? He's been hopelessly in love with her since they first met back in highschool. Sure he did his own dating thing but nothing seemed to stick. Or perhaps he hadn't tried very hard in making things stick since they weren't her. Will she ever see him as anything as a friend? Or when she finally does begin to realize her feelings...will it already be too late?

A/N: The pov will switch between the two characters. Jessica Harper is Infestation of Vitality's original character. Jonathan Reese Farris is my own. As for their appearances, Jessica is a woman of middle age, blond hair, blue/green eyes and a size eight or so. For Jonathan, just imagine Robert Downey Jr. ;]

Forgive me for any spelling or grammar mistakes. And sorry if the french is totally horribly wrong. I don't know french and just got the translation from the internet.

Chapter Two

If anyone told Jessica Harper that Jonathan "Johnny" Farris was in love with her. She'd laugh in their face and ask what they were smoking (and currently probably ask for some herself). It just didn't make sense. There was just no way that Jonathan was in love with her. She wasn't Johnny's type. He was too picky. And he deserved the best and Jessica presently, did not see herself as the best. There was a major reason that she would spout off if told this. If Johnny loved her. He'd trust her. He'd tell her. When she was seventeen, she had seen that scar. She had asked. It had been called an accident. But Jessica wasn't stupid. The way he said it. There was more to that story, but Johnny had never trusted her enough to tell her the truth. Not, that she really pressed the issue. But if Johnny loved her, than he would have trusted her enough with the truth. Love needed trust. Trust and Love came hand in hand. Jessica had always bared her soul with Johnny. He'd seen her at her worse, that night in college. Drugged out until she finally blacked out.

After she had woken up, she freaked out. Waking up in your best friend's room after blacking out was going to be scary even if you trusted that person with your life. Of course, it didn't take Johnny long to calm her down though. And she spent the rest of that day crying in his arms, because that's what a best friend was for, after all. Needless to say, though, after that night she never went to a frat party again. That was probably why she had started dressing conservatively as well. After that incident the only person to see her in any sort of 'sexy' dress had been Johnny, and then Jeff of course. No, she wasn't about to make herself a target again for some drunken frat boy. So, Johnny had saved her life. That didn't mean he loved her though. After all hadn't he dated throughout the years?

When they were in high school, hadn't he taken another girl to Homecoming? Hadn't he asked some other girl to their Junior and Senior Proms?

When they were in college at their first basketball game, hadn't he kissed that random girl in the seat next to him when he could have kissed her instead?

After college graduation hadn't he gone on those dates that she had set him up on.

Yes. He had done all of those things. But, if he really loved her, which of course, he didn't...there was one thing he just didn't do.

Tell her.

That was what Jessica would end with if anyone told her that Johnny was in love with her. Because, Johnny had never been one to keep things in, except for 'the accident' that gave him a a near perfect scar. But really other than that, he never kept things to himself. If he had ever really liked her, let alone loved he would have said something, right? Of course he would. And that's what Jessica Harper would tell someone if they mentioned the fact that Johnny loved her.

After she climbed into the car, she couldn't help but roll her eyes at his previous words. Like any divorced woman would feel, she didn't feel thin, in fact, she felt like a bloated cow, despite the fact that her eating had been as expected. Instead of binging, she hadn't really ate much. It was toss up. Most women were one or the other after a break up. And seeing as the girl that Jeff had left her for was a size two to her size twelve, she didn't really feel like eating most the time.

Except around Johnny. He had her feel better, as always. Yep. Johnny made her feel normal.

" Oh stop, Don't do the feeling sorry for myself thing, it doesn't suit you. We both know I don't care for being a bachelor, let alone a rich one... and my Friday nights are only fun when they're with you. "

"I really don't see why you're single then. You could have any woman that you damn well wanted. Or is it that working from home has made you so lazy you won't tell a girl how you feel? ...Unless under all of that manliness you're actually gay, but still any gay guy would want you too." Her words were true, at least in her mind. He could have anyone he wanted, but not for a second did she actually think he was gay. That was just a small joke from her. The teasing in her voice showed it. Truthfully, she never understood why he was single. He was perfect. Any woman would want him.

And there had been times when Jessica wanted him too.

Like in high school when he didn't ask her to the Homecoming dance when every guy that she knew did. Like when he didn't ask her to Junior or Senior prom. Especially when he saved her life. But who didn't want their best friend occasionally? It was normal, right? That's what Jessica told herself. And anything she felt now was just because of the divorce. Besides, guys like Johnny were so far out of her league it wasn't funny.

" I made reservations at a fancy little place earlier today. "

He would do that to her. Always when she was just coming from work. When she was wearing the cheap clothes (not that she really had many expensive things) that were occasionally stained with markers, paint, and God knew what else that third graders got into. Sometimes, she didn't even want to know what got on her shirt. However, she wasn't too offended by the fact that he always seemed to do that. In fact, Jessica always found it a bit funny that so many people stared at her when she came in with him.

"You would pick the day that i've got paint on my shirt to go somewhere nice." she could only imagine where he had chosen. Sometimes she wondered if he went to these places just because he could. As would be expected from a middle class elementary school teacher, sometimes Jessica did feel self-conscious in those places. After all, who wouldn't? They were in L.A. The rich and famous lived there.

As they drove, her green eyes wondered over to Johnny. He really did mean the world to her. Perhaps that's why she was so blind when it was so obvious to other people, like her brother Zach or her sister Melissa. They both seemed to ask very probing questions about Johnny, despite the fact that Zach had never even met Johnny. Or maybe he did...once. Years ago when he had come to California for break during his last year of college. She couldn't really remember.

When the restaurant came into view, Jessica rolled her eyes and laughed. "Do you just like bringing me to these places to piss people off? Do millionaires have like an actual distaste for middle class folk and that's why you do this?" It was nice though. Johnny could really give any girl the world. Plus if he ever decided to have kids, he'd have beautiful babies with any woman. Just because they were best friends didn't stop her from noticing how good looking he was.

If Johnny had had any sense, he would of realized how stupid the way his mind thought. Though everytime throughout the years they spent together before she met Jeff.. Every single time he was going to say something about asking her out and taking charge.. She threw out the stupid friend word and he lost all confidence he had. Men had the stupidest thinking mentally sometimes. Believing that if you were called a friend that's all you could ever be in that woman's eyes... But so far it seemed true. After all, it was the twenty first century, women commonly asked men out now and days and made the first move cause Men had grew to be cowards.

So if Jesscia ever felt anything for him, it didn't show.. Just friendship...which isn't all he wanted anymore. Jonathan was growing needy, he couldn't wait any longer, being friends was no longer good enough. Regardless, it wasn't trust issues he had with Jessica... No, it was more like she was shamed of who his birth parents were and how desperate he had gotten for food that he had to steal something. The way he saw it, the scar was a sick punishment he deserved for trying to steal. Still living was giving him a chance at redemption.

" I really don't see why you're single then. You could have any woman that you damn well wanted. Or is it that working from home has made you so lazy you won't tell a girl how you feel? ...Unless under all of that manliness you're actually gay, but still any gay guy would want you too. "

If Johnny had been drinking something, it would of gone down the wrong pipe. He was anything BUT homosexual. Sure, there were times when he found a guy attractive but didn't woman have those moments of 'oh she's so pretty' so it was the same thing.. right? It wasn't like he was thinking of doing anything sick with them or something. No, he liked woman. Johnny had stayed quiet for a couple of seconds before replying when he came across a red light.

" That's not true, The only one I want, I can't seem to have. "

That was the direction where the conversation was going to go. Jessica would find out he did have his eyes set on some mystery woman. The only mystery was that it was her. He'd give her vague details of anything she asked like 'do i know her' or 'Why can't you?' and logically he'd reply with a 'oh you know her' and 'Because she was married but got recently divorced and no there's that stupid rule of how your suppose to wait two years before jumping in the dating pool. Yeah, my life sucks.. at least romantically.' Johnny thought the words in his mind. It was true and it didn't automatically mean her because he had three other friends that were girls who recently got divorced in the last six months. Naturally Jessica had met them all because that's what he did. He wanted her to see who he hung around with when she was busy or off in lala land with Jeff. Nevertheless, he had more guy friends than girls.

" You would pick the day that i've got paint on my shirt to go somewhere nice. Do you just like bringing me to these places to piss people off? Do millionaires have like an actual distaste for middle class folk and that's why you do this? "

" Haha, babe, you look fine as usual no matter what your wearing but I'd figure you'd say that and planned ahead. There's a dress in the trunk for you to wear. "

Truthfully he didn't care if she went to a restaurant in her pajama's and everyone stared at her like she was a freak. Okay so maybe he cared for her sake about the people staring at her. But he'd just get a secluded table away from the dumb snobs. Another reason he took her to these places...was simple. It wasn't just because he had the money to 'throw away'.

It wasn't because he wanted to flaunt his wealth or embrass her. Oh no, it was just because he wanted her to go someplace nice.. fancy. He wanted her to go to a place she deserved to go. Sure, a little burger joint was cool, but he just didn't know how to tell her these things. Jonathan knew she wouldn't care if they did eat at a normal place. Sometimes he just didn't know how to explain himself well enough so she'd understand him. Regardless they were at the restaurant now. The vallet was going to take his car, but he shook his head and said he'd park it himself.

He was touchy when it came to his cars. No one drove them besides himself... and of course occasionally Jessica. Another sign of his secret love, he seriously wouldn't let any other friend touch his cars let alone drive them. After he parked, he got out of the car, closed the door behind him, and then opened the trunk. There it was, the dress covered in a dry cleaning sheef to perserve it's ironed fresh look. It was newly bought just for her. Yes, he knew her dress size and whatnot just like she knew his. It was weird but when you were as close as they were, occasions arised where you needed to know these things.. Don't ask. He took the dressed wrapped up and gave it to her, then closed the trunk and locked the car. Then he lead her to the doors of the restaurant, she could change in the bathroom and he'd wait before they found their table.

" That's not true, The only one I want, I can't seem to have. "

Oh, yeah. Jessica could believe that. Sometimes she wondered if he just liked being melodramatic, but well...maybe that just sounded a little too Hollywood. However, she couldn't help but wonder about the seriousness in his voice and it bothered her. Usually when she teased him like that he would run off with it and use his usually witty tone. But now he was serious. The deeper it sank the more it bothered her. Who wouldn't want him? He was too perfect. The idea of someone not wanting her best friend was almost enough, well it did make her angry. After all, Johnny was so perfect!

"Oh? Really, now?"

Though, she knew that if she asked about who this person was, well, she'd hear the same cliche answers. But still, she couldn't help but try and piece the words together in her mind as they drove through the red light. She'd have to phrase it in a way that made him give her a name. But knowing Johnny and how smart he was,well, even though they went to the same college, he was able to outsmart her any day. Not that she was stupid. He was just...coy and tricky when he wanted to be. Definitely evasive about certain things. However, her mind was distracted when he said that he had a dress in the back of the car.

Why wasn't she surprised? Most of the dresses that were in her closet were because Johnny had bought them for her. They were beautiful and so....well, they were just perfect dresses. Hell, Jeff had complained about the way she dressed but never once bought her anything. In fact the only dress that she had that Johnny hadn't bought was her wedding dress. The idea of that made her wonder.

A lot of things made her wonder. Like how she was the only person that Johnny ever let drive his cars. Always, Jessica had shrugged it off because she assumed that it was because she was a careful, to an extent paranoid, driver and was exceptionally careful driver. That's what she always thought was the reason behind it. And maybe the divorce was just fucking with her brain. Making things out of nothing. Johnny was just her best friend in the entire world. That was it. Man, did she need a glass of wine or something. Maybe she would take her sister's advice and start seeing a shrink. Did her health insurance cover that? Eh. She'd have to check. Otherwise, a shrink in California probably made more than a damn heart surgeon.

As Johnny opened the trunk and she saw the dress, her eyes widened at the short, but classy cocktail dress. When Johnny handed it to her, she gave him a soft look of appreciation. "Oh, Johnny, it's so...It's beautiful..." she told him, feeling some tears well up in her eyes. If only Jeff had done things like this, maybe she wouldn't have been so dependent on Johnny for things like this. Things that made her feel good about herself. Why did her best friend make her feel things her husband never did?

Once inside the bathroom, she quickly changed into the dress and rejoined Johnny outside. Of course, she had run her fingers through her hair and made sure that her make-up didn't look that bad before she did. And once he told his name to the guy with the list, they were seated in a cozy little corner away from the eyes of any one of the rich and famous of Los Angelos. Mostly the professional elite like Johnny was. It was such an amazing restaurant. The lights were low so everyone looked better. The plants were real, but quite classy rather than tacky.

Of course the cheapest thing on the menu was the salad and that was still thirty bucks because the vegetables were organically grown and all natural. Whatever. Though, she was hardly paying attention to her surroundings as she was lost in thought, even has the waiter talked about the specials and what not. No. Her thoughts were elsewhere, particularly on the man that was sitting across from her now. When she heard the waiter stop talking and walk away, she smiled inside as her eyes wandered over the man before her.

"Johnny...is there anything I can do for you? I mean...it just seems that lately, you're doing all these amazing things for me and I just...I don't know how to thank you for it all." It was the truth. She didn't know how to thank him, or even if she could.

"In just one hour you've managed to make me reconsider sulking about for the next two years." How could anyone even consider waiting two years to date? Jeff had already ruined twelve years of her life. Why did she have to wait another two years? That wasn't to say she wanted to date right away, but...really? Two years? And with a friend like Johnny, he certainly wasn't going to let her do such a thing. But did she even want to date anymore? God. She didn't know.

What did she know these days, though?

Jonathan had invisioned how the dress would wrap around her body when he had bought it. But visioning something and actually seeing it...well let's just say there was no comparison. At first he was going to get black, but then he bought a red classy cocktail dress instead. Why? Because everyone wore black, he wanted her to shine and to stand out compared to the rest. Though he had to say when he gave his name to the host, he noticed the appreciative gleam in his eye that he gave to Jessica when his eyes had trailed over her body with hunger. Then the waiter had come and rattled off all the specials they had. Johnny let him finish before ordering one of the red wines he usually ordered to go with their meals when they came to places like this.

" Johnny...is there anything I can do for you? I mean...it just seems that lately, you're doing all these amazing things for me and I just...I don't know how to thank you for it all.
In just one hour you've managed to make me reconsider sulking about for the next two years. "

Holy fucking mother of fuck. You had to be kidding. Jonathan just couldn't catch a break could he? Hearing that she wasn't going to wait two years to start dating just felt like a kick in the groin. She was already going to start seeing other guys? Sure maybe not this month, but whatever the one after that? Did God have something against him wanting to be truly happy? If not, it sure seemed like it. Everytime he was working up the nerve to make a move, something like this happened. Jonathan was starting to think maybe it was best to just... not think about her in that way anymore. No, he couldn't think that way... He couldn't give up so fast after all these years.

" How about you go to my place and you spend the night like old times staying up watching movies. "

What the hell right? If he was going to torture himself, why not go all the way. He seriously had to be a masochist or something. Nevertheless, when he said that it brought up a few old memories. She had spent the night at his house several times over the years after an argument had broke out between her and Jeff. Whenever she got back, Jeff would of course accuse her of having an affair and then they'd fight again and it turned into an endless cycle sometimes she had to stay at his house for a week until everything returned to normal. Nevertheless, the last time she had stayed the night had been a good three months ago.

Another thing that made him such an upstanding guy friend was the fact he didn't act all macho and would say hell no to a chick flick. Nope, he was a push over when it came to movies. Wether they sat back and watched classic old movies, action, scary, and the romantic comedy ones. The funny thing about his house was that despite it's size it WAS made for a bachelor and only had one master bedroom. His bed was big enough, a little too big he thought. A king size and all, it had other rooms but he had those for his office, his gym and the home theatre. Though if he ever managed to settle down and have kids, he'd sacrifice everything for a baby's room.

Going into the details of his not so humble home, he also had a large four car garage that held a classic mint condition black chevelle, his Audi R8 which they had taken today, his ninja motorcycle and of course the Tesla. Not to mention the large pool and jacuzi. The outside of the house was impressive as well though he didn't bother with decorating. No, he had someone do that for him cause if he had his way, he'd buy stuff at the anitque store. Why? Who really wanted to sit on something modern looking but it felt like crap. When they could have something that looked like it lived, looked interesting and overall felt comfy? though he did specifically want a red sofa, a comfortable one at that.

The outside of his house wasn't one of those omg that is seven million dollars worth of land. No, he wasn't that kind of guy. Sure, he liked flashy sometimes but he didn't want to live in something flashy...especially since he was alone and didn't really have someone to share all that space with. Sometimes, it was funny, but sometimes when ever she kissed him on the cheek or he kissed her on hers... He felt like losing control and enveloping her in his arms and kissing her everywhere. Of course during this process she would probably freak out and bat him away. Not to mention the thought of losing his best friend over losing control.. it just wasn't a pleasent thought, so he remained in control... for the most part at least. Regardless, the waiter came around again and asked if they were ready.. in french. Glancing towards the waiter he replied without hesitation.

" Nous aurons Coq dans le vin pour deux et une salade pour deux. "

The waiter nodded and walked away taking their menus. Johnny had taken her to certain places before like this and he usually stuck to the basic classic dishes that were traditional in whatever type of place they would go. Like the one they were in was a fench restaurant and he ordered basically salad and rooster in wine for two. Jonathan had learned a few other languages besides english at his father's suggestion since it made doing business over seas easier. Currently his business was running in France, Japan and Germany. Though he'll admit his japanese wasn't the best it could be.

Please review and let me know what you guys think!