I didn't miss much. Chatter amongst
technical difficulties. My head pivots
left and right and I see them, laughing
during an unknown conversation.
Smiles like the smell of warm cider on
a chilly autumn night invite me over.
The only bachelor undoubtedly
the most loved. Awkward as a goose
flying south solo but just as strong
as one that could make that flight.
Problem solved, music reaches
the hundred ninety-fourth decibel.
Voices drowned by a loud beat
felt like a stomp on one's chest.
Homecoming's cliché appearance
leaves me observing my friends,
carefree with their partners but
I exist. Offering their partners
with their agreement that I may
dance. I decline with a smile.
A slow song, they dance close
I lean up against a pole, alone.
My eyes lock with a freshman girl
dressed modestly in a smooth
baby blue dress down to her knees
and a cream colored shawl over
the upper section of it. Her eyes
lock with me; a junior boy
in black dress pants and shoes
a lavender shirt and a tie to match.
My brown unkempt hair to her long
dark curls like glistening decorations.
She shrugs and I step forward.
She meets my advance and raises
her arms to my shoulders and mine
slightly above the small of her back.
Two acquaintances, strangers
of a bond, enjoy the company
of each other. Our friends smile
at us. The song ends, we separate.
Another slow song another dance.
This time she pulls me closer
in her arms; leading me as we
go along. Never have I been closer
to any girl than I was to her at
that moment. The night was
still young. Two acquaintances
dancing in circles among friends
as the night carries on. The song ends
as an upbeat tempo changes the mood
like the sudden overthrow of a dictator
the crowd jumps. For a second time
we separate the excited crowd dominates.
A third slow love song plays and
we dance again. She pulls me even
closer than the last time. More like
a hug with my head on her shoulder
and hers in my chest spinning around
in circles I wished would never end.
The smell of her hair like a rose garden
I shut my eyes and let her lead. But
like the former two, this had to end.
Parting slowly as I slid my hands and
crept back upward I stared long at her
knowing very well that neither of us knew
what was happening. We just hoped
for one more chance to feel the comfort
of each other's arms before the nights end.
Half an hour left with nothing but fast paced
rhythms excite the room. Wanting comfort
we find each other's arms and dare to quicken
our pace. We share company to rid the night
of our mutual loneliness. It has been too long
that we have been on our own that we could
not enjoy even the company of someone
we barely know. Right or wrong it happened
for a reason. Never had we been so close
to another. Call it love, call it lust, call it
anything. Not a word was spoken between
us. There was no need to say what we showed.
The night drew to a close too early like
a Monday morning rest. It was the first
time and maybe the last. Memories like
lessons from our favorite book will stay
forever. No insecurity was had that night.
We reassured each other that our beauty
was unmatched by anything. It shined
for us and maybe it will continue to shine
for us. But if not, it can shine for someone
else. My eyes met hers, and her eyes mine
for one final time knowing what happened
but not how. We thanked each other by
drawing us into one final embrace to feel
the arms of comfort warm us like a bowl of
soup to sickened child. Not saying a word
we parted for the final time. I walked with
knees bending backwards, stumbling, like
a drunken flamingo but as joyous as I'd
ever been. The night I was held for the
first time, the night a girl and a boy found
the courage to rid their loneliness if only
for a minute.