All my life, I believed that truth triumphs over everything else.
Every story, every book, every movie, said the same.
And now here I am, surrounded by people, who hate me,
Who love to make me cry, love to play mind games.
I'm standing face to face with my enemies,
The people who turned my world upside down
And ripped my soul out of me.
I see them, smiling, laughing, having fun.
I see they are everything they ever wanted to be!
And here I am, standing all alone in a dark room,
Waiting for someone to tell me the truth.
Here I am, feeling hopeless, surrounded by gloom.
I always believed in justice for everyone.
I always believed in fairy tales, in happy ending.
But every day, those heartless beasts go away
And further away from punishment,
They keep taunting me; make sure that my heart isn't mending.
I just cry, cry and pray.
Hoping that maybe today,
God will listen to me and do something about my misery.
I keep telling myself that I will never lose my faith
Even when I stand face to face with death.
And now that nothing has changed,
I have some questions for you, dear God.
One. Are you testing my faith?
I survived two blows.
Betrayal, lies, cheating, blames,
People looking down at me, all the shame.
Yet, every day, my faith continues to glow.
Every day I bow my head in prayer.
I never accuse you to be my emotional slayer.
I never revenge my enemies myself,
I leave it to you and instead opt for the right thing to do.
So tell me God, do you think I don't have faith in you?
Two. Are you testing my strength?
I picked up the broken pieces of my heart by myself.
I shoved my past away, stored it in my heart's furthest shelf.
I keep going on, no matter what.
I took each heart break as a lesson,
And remembered the things it taught.
The smile never faded from my face.
So tell me God, can you accuse me of weakness?
Three. Are you really as just as people say?
I keep praying to you every day.
I don't want you to hurt them like they hurt me.
I just want you to take away my pain.
I don't want to cry again-
Not for them.
I want to forget their names.
I want to forget everything about my past.
So tell me God, are you going to answer my prayer at last?
Four. Am I a bad person?
People say sinners suffer.
In that case, I have my humble life to offer.
But let me remind you,
I am the girl that goes on caring for others.
I try to be as nice and kind as possible,
I never want to hurt my mother and father.
I am the teen that wants to do something for the world.
I am the person who never takes shelter in lies.
And I'm the person who ends each day crying.
So, tell me God, am I not good enough?
There's just one answer I can find.
And that's what I keep telling myself.
I keep thinking that you love me,
That I am special to you.
That you are hurting me,
So that I become a better person,
And think of things to do
To help those who need my help.
You stab me in the heart,
So that I learn to be stronger and stronger,
So that I stay silent, I never yelp.
Well, this is not the way.
I'm gonna say it today.
I've given enough tests.
I always believed you'd decide the rest.
But the more I suffer silently,
The more I get tortured.
I can clearly see there's no end!
I didn't break down when I lost everything,
When my world shook
And everything ended in one swing.
You took away all the things I cared about.
Now you'll have to hear me scream and shout.
I know what you want me to do,
And I'm doing it, for me, for you,
For everyone out there.
By now you should know that I CARE.
I refuse to be treated like this.
Don't you think I deserve a bit of bliss?
I am sorry for raising my voice.
But you left me no choice.
I am your servant, yes,
But sometimes this pain gets too much.
I am a human, after all.
I can't just survive fall after fall.
And as your servant,
I do have a right to ask you questions.
Think over them.
And let me know your answer.
I NEED TO KNOW WHY THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME.
Why me? What did I do?
I need answers from you.