Long were the nights when my days once revolved around you
Counting my footsteps, praying the floor won't fall through, again
My mother accused me of losing my mind, but I swore I was fine
You paint me a blue sky and go back and turn it to rain
And I lived in your chess game, but you changed the rules every day
Wondering which version of you I might get on the phone, tonight
Well, I stopped picking up and this song is to let you know why

Leilani sighed as she continued to shove various articles of clothing into her suitcase. She needed to go... to get away for a while. She knew leaving like this was cowardly and perhaps even a little wrong, but she was sick of the games and the lying and the cheating. Her heart couldn't take much more before it exploded. She'd had enough.

She loved Johnathan with her whole heart. They'd been together since she was sixteen. They were fine for the first couple of years. Perfect, even, but something changed. He changed. She'd been told to stay away from him, to avoid him because he was bad news and in the end, he'd only break her heart, but she hadn't listened. She'd seen the side of him that none of them had seen, the side of him that, for some reason, he hid from the world.

He'd told her she was special and he'd promised her forever, but he'd gone and fucked it up. On her nineteenth birthday, no less.

Her birthday a few months ago had started out wonderfully. She'd been happy- all her friends and family had been there, but the one person that hadn't been there was the one person she wanted to be there the most. She'd called him plenty of times throughout the night and not once had he answered. She'd found out the next morning that he'd cheated on her- on the night of her birthday, her boyfriend of nearly three years had cheated on her.

He'd tried explaining himself to her, saying that he was sorry and he'd been drunk and that he'd do anything to do that night over if he could. She'd said him being drunk was no excuse, and he'd gone on to say that he knew that, but he loved her and he'd do anything to get her to trust him again. She'd said that she needed time and he'd given her that- a week, that was all the time she'd needed before she called him and told him that he was forgiven.

What she hadn't known was that he'd still been cheating and that he hadn't even been drunk the first time he cheated. Nor had he been drunk the other times.

She'd learned of all of that this morning. Tucker, a mutual friend of Leilani's and Johnathan's had been keeping John's secret since that first night, and apparently, he'd told John a couple of weeks ago that if he didn't tell Leilani he was cheating on her, than he would.

Tucker came to see her earlier that morning, telling her all of John's indiscretions the second he stepped through the doors. He'd apologized for not telling her sooner, saying that he hadn't thought it was his place and that he'd hoped John would tell her the truth, and after calming herself down, Leilani told him that she understood but that he needed to go so she could collect herself.

She spent nearly an hour crying before deciding what exactly it was she had to do. There would be no forgiving John this time. No third chances. She was leaving.

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone

Don't you think I was too young to be messed with
The girl in the dress cried the whole way home
I should've known

She'd just finished packing her things when she heard the front door open. Her heart rate sped up, but she tried to stay calm. She hadn't prepared herself for this. Yes, she'd been planning on letting him know that she was leaving, but she hadn't expected to do it so soon.

Within moments, he was up the stairs and in the room, glancing at her with an expression of confusion after he'd spotted her packed suitcase.

"You talked to Tuck, didn't you?" he asked, catching on a lot quicker than she'd expected. She should have known that he'd guess that so easily, though. He'd always been intelligent... that was one of the things she loved about him. Something she still did love about him. It was just, she couldn't stay with him.

Seeing him was hurting her a lot more than she would have liked, and part of her was screaming at her to stay, to work things out with him, but she couldn't do that. Not this time, because this time, he'd gone too far. He'd lied to her for months and she couldn't deal with it anymore.

"Butterfly, I don't know what to say..."

Leilani shook her head, a sigh leaving her lips the second he referred to her as 'Butterfly.' She'd always loved that nickname. He'd started calling her that because she had an obsession with butterflies- it was something he'd called her the first time he'd met her.

They'd met at one of her best friend's parties during the summer before her junior year. Her brother, Tucker, had invited some of his older friends, and one of those friends just so happened to be Johnathan. She'd been sixteen at the time and he'd been twenty-one, but the age difference hadn't mattered to either one of them. They clicked the minute Tucker introduced them and it was all uphill from there. They'd had their fair share of arguments, of course, but they'd always found their way back to each other, and they never went more than a week without speaking to each other.

But this time was different. This wasn't some silly argument that could be fixed with an 'I'm sorry' and a bouquet of white roses. There was nothing that could fix this.

"Don't say anything," she said, finally gathering enough courage to speak. She tried so hard to keep her voice from cracking, but it wasn't easy because her heart was breaking. "You lied to me. Not just once. I can't stay with someone like you."

"I'll change," Johnathan pleaded. He didn't want to lose her. He wasn't cheating anymore. He'd stopped when Tucker threatened him. He'd hoped that would be enough, but he should have known that it wasn't; his best friend was too good of a man to not let someone he cared about know that they were being lied to. He wanted to be angry, but he couldn't. He had no right to be. His friend had just done what he'd been too afraid to do.

"But, you won't," Leilani countered, choking on her words as tears began forming in her eyes for the second time that day, but she refused to let them fall again.

Well, maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame
Or maybe it's you and your sick need to give love then take it away
And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors who don't understand
And I'll look back in regret, how I ignored when they said 'run as fast as you can'

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with
The girl in the dress cried the whole way home
Dear John, I see it all now it was wrong
Don't you think nineteen's too young
To be played by your dark, twisted games
When I loved you so
I should've known

"I will, for you." He meant it. He would change. For her. He'd do anything for her, anything to keep her in his life. He'd been stupid and wrong and he wished he could take it all back because seeing her so hurt killed him. And what hurt even worse was knowing that he'd caused it.

"It's too late," Leilani managed to choke out while still forcing back those tears that were threatening to fall at any moment.

"It can't be. I love you," John said. He knew his words were a wasted effort. She'd already made up her mind, but he couldn't not fight for her. He was too damn stubborn to let her go that easily.

"You don't play games with the ones you love," was her only response. She didn't even know why she was still there. She could leave. He wouldn't try to stop her, she knew that. He'd want to, but she knew he'd let her go despite that because he did love her. She didn't doubt that, no matter how stupid that sounded after everything he'd done that probably should have made her think otherwise. But, the thing was, people hurt the ones they love. So, she did believe that he loved her. She just didn't believe that he loved her enough to stay faithful.

Perhaps she'd always known that, known that he was the type of guy who would eventually stray from the commitment he'd made because he was scared. She just hadn't wanted to believe it, because she'd loved him so much. She still did. She always would.

"I never meant to hurt you." He felt stupid for saying that. It made him feel like more a jerk because he knew his words weren't helping her any. He knew he wasn't making walking away any easier for her, and though he didn't want her to walk away, what he wanted even less was to hurt her more than he already had.

"You should have thought of that before you cheated that first time... before you cheated all those other times," she said, finally allowing her tears to fall because she was so sick of fighting them, of fighting how she felt. She wanted him to see how much he hurt her, and how much he was still hurting her by feeding her that false promise that he could change, because they both knew he couldn't.

You are an expert at sorry, and keeping lines blurry
Never impressed by me acing your tests
All the girls that you run dry with tired, lifeless eyes cause you burned them out
But I took your matches before fire could catch me, so don't look now:
I'm shining like fireworks over your sad, empty town

After stepping forward, Johnathan enveloped Leilani in his arms, letting her cry into his chest, not caring that she was staining his favorite t-shirt. She was crying because she was hurting and she was hurting because of him, and holding her was the least he could do.

He'd loved this girl since she was sixteen and he was twenty-one. Everyone had warned her to stay away from him, even Tucker, his own best friend, but she hadn't listened. She'd taken a chance on him, looked past that facade of his that hid his true self from the world and fallen in love with the man that he truly was underneath all that. She'd put her trust in him, relied on him to always be there for her, and he had been, at first. He'd loved her, so much, and he would have done anything to make her happy, but she was nineteen now and he was twenty-four, and they'd been living together for eighteen months and marriage had been brought up more than once... he just got scared, so he did what any other idiot would have done and cheated. Then he lied about it.

He'd never forgive himself for hurting her, for taking her trust away and being the cause for those tears that were now falling and probably plenty of tears that had fallen before the ones that were currently staining his t-shirt.

"Don't go," he whispered into her hair.

Leilani shivered, forcing herself to pull away from him. She wiped at her eyes before grabbing her suitcase.

"You'll never stop cheating, John," Leilani said, her voice less shaky than it had been before. She had to be strong. She was strong. She wouldn't let him break her anymore.

He opened his mouth to protest, but she cut him off before he could get a word in. "You can deny it all you want, but you know it's the truth. I'm sick of playing this game. I'm sick of feeling like you're always lying to me. I can't stay with someone that I don't trust."

Dear John, I see it all now that you're gone
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with
The girl in the dress cried the whole way home

I see it all now that you're gone
Don't you think I was too young to be messed with
The girl in the dress wrote you a song, you should've known

With a sigh, she made her way out of the bedroom, only looking back once she was standing in the hallway.

"You'll always have a piece of my heart, but I can't let you control me anymore. You broke me. You broke my heart. I gave you my trust and you threw it away. You're not good for me and you won't be good for anyone else until you learn to stop being so scared," she said, cutting in again before he could say anything. She was done listening to him talk. She was tired of the excuses. It was done. This was their final goodbye. "I was so young when I fell for you, so stupid. I let myself believe that you weren't who they said you were, and though that guy isn't everything you are, he's still a part of you and I don't like him. That's why I have to do this. I have to leave. I'm not going to say I'm sorry, because I'm not. I shouldn't have to be.

"I'll always love you, but you'll never see me again. Goodbye, John." Those were the last words she spoke before racing down the stairs and out the front door of what used to be their house, but was now part of her past. Johnathan was her past, and as she got in her car and drove off, she decided that was where he and their relationship would stay. Like she told him, she would always love him, but she deserved better. Johnathan may have loved her, but not enough. He took her for granted. She wouldn't let that happen again. She'd be more careful next time because she never wanted to feel this way again. She'd learned her lesson. She didn't think John had, as much as she wished that weren't true. That was why she'd left, because she knew he'd never change.

She just hoped the next girl that came into his life saw him for who he was and listened to her friends and family before it was too late and he became her everything.

You should've known
Don't you think I was too young
You should've known


I don't know where these are coming from, I really don't. Taylor Swift is seriously starting to become my muse. Y'know, I might have to like send something through fan mail or whatever telling her that, lulz.

Again, I don't own Taylor Swift or her music.

Also, I kind of love Leilani and Johnathan. I wish I would have thought of them before this angsty fic. I might write other one-shots with them. Like, maybe their relationship before this heartbreaking ending.

I tried to go easy on Johnathan, to make the reader see things from his point of view. I know 'Dear John' was written for John Mayer, who actually is quite a player, which is why Johnathan was such a cheater, but I didn't want him to be made out as a bad guy. An asshole, yes, but an asshole that just has some serious issues with commitment.

I despise cheaters. More than anything. I'm just saying that, even if it is no excuse, some people do get scared. It's called being human, yeah?