[ALEX is sitting at a bench in the park, dressed in a black dress with a large matching hair bow. She's on her lunch break, enjoying a bagel and salad. Her drink, in an open bottle, is sitting next to her.]

VOICE(SIGFRIED)

(off stage) I've got it!

[A frisbee comes crashing onto the bench, right into the bottle.]

VOICE (SIGFRIED)

Or not...I'll get it!

[The contents spill over ALEX's dress. She throws her bagel aside in irritation, getting up and shaking her skirt.]

ALEX

Fucking A!

[SIGFRIED enters in a jog, pausing when he sees the irritated ALEX. He sheepishly approaches.]

SIGFRIED

Shit... sorry about that.

[ALEX just looks up and glares, wiping at her skirt with a napkin.]

SIGFRIED

Oh! Um...here.

[He gets out a bandana from his back pocket and helps her wipe down her skirt.]

SIGFRIED

Is it going to stain?

[ALEX snorts.]

ALEX

Sugarless apple juice on a black skirt? I'll send you the cleaning bill.

[SIGFRIED pauses as if to think about that.]

SIGFRIED

...Oh. Well, I guess that's lucky then? And at least your dress doesn't look

that expensive.

ALEX

(flatly) It's a $230 dollar import from Japan.

[SIGFRIED literally falls over in shock.]

SIGFRIED

Seriously?!

ALEX

Seriously. It's designer.

SIGFRIED

Shit, I don't even pay that much on sneakers! Didn't know the gothic Bo-

Peep look was that pricey.

[SIGFRIED starts to go back to helping, but ALEX glares at him again, tugging her skirt out of his hands.]

ALEX

My "look" has nothing to do with Bo-Peep.

[SIGFRIED moves to try to clean the skirt again. ALEX clearly flinches.]

SIGFRIED

Sorry. My friends and I knock your drink into your dress and I just keep

looking like a douche, offending you and stuff.

[ALEX turns to wipe down the bench quickly and sits back down, picking her bagel up again.]

SIGFRIED(CONT'D)

How about I try this again?

[He holds his hand out to shake.]

Hi. I'm sorry about that. And your name is––?

[ALEX doesn't look at him or acknowledge his hand.]

ALEX

Alex.

SIGFRIED

Alice? Oh, so you're really doing the whole Wonderla–––

ALEX

I said Alice.

[SIGFRIED frowns, seeing that he messed up again. He fidgets, then picks up the frisbee and sits next to her.]

SIGFRIED

(pause) I'm Sigfried.

[He holds his hand out again. ALEX laughs somewhat sharply, putting down her food and finally looking at him.]

ALEX

Your name is Sigfried?

[SIGFRIED pouts, clearly wishing he didn't give his full first name.]

SIGFRIED

My mother was a dancer, ok? She decided to name me after a character

from her favorite show. Just call me Fred.

ALEX

(pause) I honestly like 'Sigfried,' though. Besides, it could be worse. You

could have been named 'Mime'. (note: said "Mim") So many people

mispronounce that as 'mime'.

SIGFRIED

(surprised) You know the Ring Cycle?

ALEX

(shrugs) I minor in literature and thought it was a good follow up to reading

Beowulf. Plus, the operas seem to still be a source of inspiration for some

contemporary painters.

SIGFRIED

(smiles) That's really cool! I love mythology and shit. It's really cool seeing

how it ties into history and all. (sliding a little closer) So, you like art?

ALEX

(inches away again, nodding) I intern at a gallery two blocks from here.

SIGFRIED

Wait, intern? How old are you?

ALEX

I'm turning twenty in a couple of months.

SIGFRIED

No shit! Seriously? I didn't think you'd actually be older than me.

ALEX

How old did you think I would be?

SIGFRIED

(sheepishly) Well, I was honestly nervous that you'd be a high schooler, but I figured that wouldn't be all too likely if you were out here on you own for lunch. I don't think there's a high school that's really near by at least.

ALEX

Not that I know of, no.

[She thinks about that for a bit, not really noticing Sigfried grin as he toys with the frisbee.]

ALEX (Cont'd)

(looking at the frisbee) Aren't you supposed to be going back to your

friends?

SIGFRIED

Huh? (looks) Oh, right! Nah, it looks like they got bored with waiting while

we were talking. Jeff's taken out his stupid hacky sack. They know I don't

really like playing with those.

[He hands ALEX the frisbee as he nods off to the side.]

SIGFRIED (Cont'd)

You know what? I'm gonna get you a new drink at that cart since I spilled

your last one on your dress.

[He gets up and ALEX's head follows him.]

ALEX

Oh, no, that's fine. Really.

SIGFRIED

Nah, it's cool. I want to.

[He smiles and EXITS. ALEX is left on the bench and she curiously picks up the frisbee, toying with it a bit. She stands and throws it off stage, then winces after a moment. SIGFRIED returns with a couple of drinks.]

SIGFRIED

Woah. Did you just bean Joe?

ALEX

(trying to be nonchalant) If Joe is the one in the hipster glasses, then yes.

Yes, I did.

SIGFRIED

(whistles low) Nice aim.

ALEX

Yeah, if you ignore the fact that I wasn't really aiming.

[They look at each other and laugh. SIGFRIED hands ALEX her drink as they sit back down.]

SIGFRIED

You look good laughing. I mean, like... really laughing and not at my

expense. Kinda cute.

ALEX

(stops and raises her brow) Are you coming on to me?

SIGFRIED

(shrinks a little and tries to joke) At least I bought you a drink? (pause) Ok,

yeah, maybe a bit.

ALEX

Why?

SIGFRIED

Well, why not?

ALEX

(shrugs) I just never seriously think about dating. (thinks) Is that why you

said you were nervous that I might be in high school?

SIGFRIED

(pauses, then nods) I actually noticed you earlier before the frisbee ended

up here. Like, a week ago. I just didn't know how to approach you.

ALEX

You didn't just let that thing crash in my drink to talk to me, did you?

SIGFRIED

Hey! I'm not that much of a jerk. That was just chance. 'Sides, I totally

could have caught that.

ALEX

Hm. How serendipitous for you. At least it didn't stain.

SIGFRIED

And I bought you a drink. Why do you seem to uncomfortable with me

admitting that I noticed you and wanted to talk?

ALEX

Like I said, I'm not really used to this.

SIGFRIED

Nah, you said that you never thought about dating. No one's approached you thinkin' you're pretty?

ALEX

(shakes her head) Not that I've noticed at least. I was always either considered too bitchy or too weird. (pause) You think I'm pretty?

SIGFRIED

Yeah. I think your hair is pretty and it's interesting that you wear such big bows in it.

ALEX

Well, it is part of the look.

SIGFRIED

It's cute. Eye catching, but not flashy or slutty.

ALEX

(laughs) This is an outfit for work. Trust me, it can get flashy. I don't do slutty, though.

SIGFRIED

I like that. Too many girls on campus just go in sweat pants or fucking bare it all. It's like... Damn, save it for later!

ALEX

That's why I like this style. It's feminine, but not provocative. It's sort of

why I'm not used being approached by boys.

SIGFRIED

Guess I'm just the smart one then?

ALEX

Ok, now you're over doing it.

SIGFRIED

Sorry.

ALEX

It's cool. Just keep it to small talk. It's not like this is a date. I'm just on my

lunch break.

[SIGFRIED looks aside.]

ALEX (cont'd)

So, you go to uni? What's your major?

SIGFRIED

(turning back) Uh, I haven't really decided yet... I'm thinking history,

though.

ALEX

It's fitting, given your name. Plus, it's more interesting than people give it

credit. People tend to act like art history is better, but if we didn't talk about

the lives of the people involved with art movements, it'd just be a load of

boring technical crap I'd sleep through.

SIGFRIED

(smiles) That's really coo––

ALEX

(looks up at a clock tower) Oh shit, my break ended three minutes ago! I

gotta go.

[She picks up her things and gets off the bench. SIGFRIED catches her arm.]

SIGFRIED

Woah, hold on! I know I'll likely see you here next week, but... Can I at

least have your number in case I wanna talk before then?

[ALEX hesitates, then digs into her purse and pulls out a card.]

ALEX

I feel so pretentious giving you this.

SIGFRIED

Woah, professional.

ALEX

(pause) You know... I never really thought about dating before, but if you

want to––

SIGFRIED

(grins) I'll call you.

[ALEX smiles and runs to EXIT. SIGFRIED is left on the bench, still smiling as he turns the card over in his hand. The frisbee comes flying back on stage and hits him in the head.]

SIGFRIED

Ow! (pause) Oh, you fucking shits––

[He gets up, with the frisbee in hand, and throws it back, running to EXIT, opposite from ALEX's direction.]