Sometimes a kiss can lead to so much more. That's a lesson I learned, the hard way.
The wind whipped across my face as I stood there in front of the bench. Her sleeping face was that of an angel's; her lips were moist, and like a magnet pulling mine to her's. When I realized what I was doing, I couldn't stop.
I looked up into the vast sky threw the thin sheet of glass. It was lunch break and I needed to decide what to do. Go out or stay in. I never knew that this would forever change my life, just this one decision.
It was cold outside, making me regret having decided to come outside. I walked into the school garden to look for a place to go have lunch, preferably somewhere where it wasn't that windy. It was then that I saw her. She was lying on the bench sound asleep. My heart rate increased; I moved, not of my own accord; it happened.
She was the idol of the school, the girl every guy wanted. She had them all. The looks, the money, the grades, and she wasn't half bad at sports either. Cold as ice, that was what people said she was like. Me? I never even got close enough to go near her. She's my senior, after all. Now, I'm probably just making excuses for the cowardly old me.
I'll be the fist one to say that I had an unrequited love for her, or at least I thought I did. I was just your average boy who thought they new what it was. After all, she was the one every guy wanted. You wouldn't be a man if you didn't. She was what all the gossip was about; all the drama; everything was about her. There were clubs; there were fan groups; there were hate groups. But, the thing is everyone knew her. There was not person in this school that didn't know her name.
My friends and I would spend hours talking about what we would do in weird perverted situations. "What would you do if, when you were walking up the stairs, she fell on you and her chest was right in your face?" "What would you do if she was wearing a skirt, a breeze came and revealed her underwear?" "What would you do if you walked in on her when she was changing?"
The girl's all hated her. They were jealous that she got all the attention. Spreading rumors was the only thing they could do. Soon it got so bad we couldn't tell what was true or just a rumor. I guess you could say it turned her image into the "bad girl" type.
Though I say I never got close to her, there was many a times I could have. I was just too scared to do anything.
Putting on a mask. That's what I'm like. I put on a mask and fool everyone. I do the 'in' thing. But, I'm really just a coward, too scared to even show my true self to anyone, scared some might judge me and I'll be secluded from everyone, scared people will hate me.
Someone once told me, "It's better to be yourself then to be someone else. People can like you for who you are. Be yourself. I like you just for who you are!"
My childhood is a blurry mess, moving from family to family because no one wanted me. I had 'the bad side of an orphan life' as said by the people at the orphanage. "He was just an unlucky soul, that pour kid."
I stared her down a good long time. Thoughts would pop up, my mask was crumbling. Did I really like her? What did like mean anyways?
I couldn't find an excuse as to why I should do it. I just did it. I did it because I like her? It didn't sound right to me.
I did it because sometimes you just have to kiss someone like that.
That was what I did. That was what I hoped. I said it over and over in my head, convincing myself with lies. Was that all I could do when I did something I couldn't face? Am I really that weak?
It was a mistake what I did. Would I change everything that I did on that day? Well, that's an answer for the future, wouldn't you say?