At least you knew

I got a text from your sister
the shocking news was painfully clear
it said you had died in a car wreck
No one could hold back a tear
Of course it was true
But in the end, my love, at least you knew

You discovered my feelings by accident
I apologized all over asking forgiveness
But you said it was not significant
We will still be friends no matter what
It's killing me inside because I still love you
But in the end, my love, at least you knew

We had known each other for years
I didn't admire you until lately
Knowing I cannot see you again
It hurts me greatly
Although I wish you had felt it too
My darling, my love, at least you knew

It wasn't easy moving on
You had brought in my life
A new element of fun
But now all the smiles are gone
At least as you died, you knew
You knew how much I truly loved you

In retrospect, I'm glad we met one another
despite the fact we live in different counties
I will treasure the time we had forever
You gave me reasons to laugh in plentiful bounties
That smile of yours was genuine too
I thank my stars that at least you knew

If there is anything I've learned from this
besides that solely driving can seize your life
you must treasure each day with pure bliss
Life can end in a flash and you hate to hear it
We only kissed in my dreams about you
But I'm relieved that at least you knew

I can't say that I regret much
Discovering you figured me out was scary, yes
It gave our relationship an awkward touch
But we lasted through it until you left us
I never got to have you as mineā€”it's true
It comforted me to know at least you knew

We always seemed to get corresponding roles
Where you were always my leader, my rock
When you were Linus, I was your blanket to hold
When I was a Brainiac, you were my mighty Jock
When you were a Chimney Sweep, I was your sweeping broom
And when I was Babbette, you were my Lumiere candelabra*

As I bring this hurting tale to a close
I look back and smile at the memories we shared
Because now I must prove to others
Just how much I truly cared
They will probably be shocked to hear the news
But all that matters is at least you knew

This is only partially true. A good friend of mine did get in a car wreck the day after Halloween and even though his car flipped four times, he survived. So don't say "Sorry for your loss" or something. I do constantly think about what my life would be if he did die. Yes, I do love him, and yes he does know.

Hope you liked it.

*That whole stanza is basically like all the plays I did with him (because we were in a lot of plays together) and how our roles we were cast as were always related somehow, as if it was fate.