Author's Note: Hey everyone! This is the edited version of Runaway Groom. Read, review and enjoy the story!

Disclaimer: I don't own any brands, names or jokes that are mentioned in the story.

Runaway Groom

They say that my job is absurd and preposterous, that I'm ruining the blossoming foundations of a new couple's life.

I say that the groom paid me to do it.

I had my epiphany while munching on potato chips and watching re-runs of a medical reality show. Personally, I would have opted to watch whatever teen drama was on, but my mood required me to drool over the fine collection of doctors the show had. I would have caused an accident on the highway just so I can see their gorgeous faces. While musing over my plans, my best friend-Rosalyn-barged through the door, as if she was an overweight rhino running after her no saturated fat prey.

I seriously thought there was an earthquake.

She marched toward me, in very high heels, with a smug smile painted on her pretty face. She stopped in front of the television, hands on her hips, blocking the view.

"Ivy! Guess what?" she squeaked, jumping up on the balls of her feet.

I glanced at her black stilettos, wincing at the sharp heels. If I decided to wear those contraptions, I would have died from the first step I took. I shook my head silently, cursing whoever created high heels. Either the person was clueless, or they just wanted to create something that only graceful people can flaunt. Thus, allowing said graceful people to subconsciously mock the clumsy women in the world.

Unfortunately, that includes me.

"You finally got that new car that you wanted?" I guessed.

"No, but I have some very juicy gossip for you," she replied. Moving from her current position, she plopped down on the couch, giving back my view of the television. She took off her shoes, planted her feet on the table, grabbed my potato chips and proceeded to stuff herself with the fatty junk food.

This is the reason why we are best friends.

"Remember Zeus, the guy from the coffee shop?" she started. "I ran into him today while I was grocery shopping. We talked for a while. But, then, he said something really interesting and shocking."

"What?" I grabbed a handful of potato chips.

"He's married! Can you believe it? He got married last month to his high school sweetheart. From the type of person he is, I wouldn't have guessed that he would marry at the age of twenty five."

I raised an eyebrow at her. "Is that you're juiciest gossip ever? Come on Rose, I've heard more interesting gossip than that, and they all came mostly from you."

"Well, I'm not done yet! When he told me, he seemed uncomfortable and anxious. I didn't pay attention to it until he started to change the subject every time I would ask him about his wife. I confronted him about it, but he was so stubborn. I had to threaten him that I would blow up his manly bits if he didn't tell me." She chuckled humorously. "Finally, he told me. He regrets getting married. Apparently, his wife started to become The M."

I gave her a confused look. "What the hell is that?"

She shrugged. "It stands for The Money."

"I don't get it."

She rolled her eyes. "It's some guy code. The wife is called The M because The Money is the root of all evil." She shook her head. "Poor guy, I almost regret threatening to cut his male chichis."

"Yeah," I agreed. To be stuck in an awful matrimony can be both terrifying and horrible. I briefly imagined a male counterpart of Zeus's wife as my husband. I conjured up an image of a fairly obese man, shouting orders at me while chomping on a juicy hot dog, the ketchup and mayonnaise dripping into his shirt.

I quickly threw away the bag of potato chips.

"He joked that he should have gotten a mistress before they got married. Then, he would have made her interrupt their wedding, saying that she was pregnant. That would have stopped him from marrying The M. He said he would rather live with that shame than be stuck in a submissive marriage." Rose laughed at the idea, musing on what would happen if Zeus actually did go through with his plan.

Ding! Click! Chunk! Pop! Elephants!

"Rose, you just gave me an idea," I said, my smile growing.

She frowned. "Uh oh, whatever you're thinking, I'll have nothing to do with it."

"No, wait! Just listen." I proceeded to make wild gestures with both hands.

"Visualize a poor groom standing at the altar, his snotty family to his left and the bride's annoying relatives at the right. He's standing there, wishing at the horrible decorations that a miracle would happen. A miracle, like chocking on a hairball and dying, with him blaming the cat for planning on assasinating him. But, alas, the door opens and in comes the bride.

"Suddenly, a girl bursts through the back door and stops the wedding. She exclaims that she can't live a life knowing that her true love would be married to the wrong girl. Then, the groom shouts that he believes he should marry the right girl. Finally, both of them run outside; they get in a car and ride off into the sunset, leaving the devastated bride behind." I smirked. "Then, the guy gives the girl a check, thanks her for her work, and drops her off at the mall and leaves." I smiled at Rosalyn. "Isn't it a wonderful idea?"

She gave me a blank stare. "I think its pretty stupid…"

"In a clever way?" I asked, giving her a kitty cat look.

"Err...sure." A pause. "Getting money for crashing weddings is cliché, but getting paid for helping grooms runaway is kind of unique," she commented. She tapped her chin, pondering on the idea. Finally, she faced me and answered my silent question.

"I like it."

Thus, the UKC, the Untie the Knot Committee, began.

We are the UKC.

Bachelors, husbands and soon-to-be husbands love us. Wives and soon-to-be brides hate us. Children are indifferent, although they managed to make an awesome theme song for us. I swear I feel like I'm in a spy movie whenever I hear them sing it.

We are fearless.

We are professionals.

We are making money.

It was a rough start, but after five months into this gig, we were becoming famous and well-known throughout the world.

Well, in North America, at least.

The operation included me, Rosalyn and Zeus, surprisingly. After overhearing Rosalyn and I talk about it at the coffee shop, he somehow managed to squeeze his way into our business. Sneaky little bastard.

Our whole system revolves around the "Five Step Process".

Step 1: The groom meets the Sky God.

People consider the UKC as a business ran by women. This is far from the truth, as with any other rumors you might hear about us. However, we use this rumor to our advantage. Since people expect the groom to meet with a woman if he's planning on running away, the groom would meet with Zeus to be less suspicious. The groom would fill out a form for Rosalyn to look over. If he meets certain requirements, then Zeus will call and inform him of his accepted application. During this time, we would issue a background check to make sure that the groom is having a wedding. We have really jealous competitors.

Step 2: The groom meets his ladylove.

Upon receiving the call from Zeus, the groom would meet with us in a secure area in order to discuss the plan. He would meet his "mistress" or "ex-girlfriend" who will crash his wedding. It would either be Rosalyn or me. We tend to switch-off for every scheme. We would wear wigs and contacts, dye our hair, and speak in a different tone or accent. In addition, the groom can back out if he wanted to, during this time period.

Step 3: Houston, we have a plan.

A few weeks before the wedding, we would plan out our strategy. Of course, our plan depends on many points, such as the type of person the bride is, where the wedding will take place, the family and so on. The groom also decides on how he wants to execute his escape. He can choose the traditional way, where the "mistress" barges in and he runs away with her. Or, he can come up with a creative way to flee that is both effective and won't expose our identity. Planning takes at least two weeks long.

Step 4: The Main Event.

It's show time! This is where we carry out our task. Depending on the plan, it usually takes five minutes to an hour to perform it. In our past experiences, we've learned to be quick and precise. We can't make any mistakes. If we do, we would go with plan B, although we haven't resorted to such measures.

Step 5: Mission Accomplished.

If everything goes well, the groom would still be a bachelor and our identity would be unknown. In a place far away from the church, the groom would give us the payment for our job. Then, he would jump into his car and drive off into the sunset, single and lovin' it, while we divide our share of the pot.

Cue in kiddy theme song.

Operation Superman: Save Clark from Louise

A loud tap erupted from the window, causing me to look at the intruder. Zeus was standing beside the car door, motioning for me to roll it down. I pressed the button, watching slowly as it descended and revealed his face.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Rosalyn just arrived. I came here to remind you to get ready. We should be out in about five minutes or so," he replied.

I nodded in acknowledgement. I turned on the car engine, hearing it roar to life.

Zeus sighed loudly, catching my attention. "You know, if you came up with this idea a long time ago, I probably wouldn't have married that girl and spend a huge amount of money in our divorce."

I laughed. "Well, if I didn't, you would probably still be begging people for money." I patted his shoulder. "Just be glad you got some."

"I am. It's surprising how much a groom will pay someone to crash his wedding. One more year of college for me and then I'll be getting a real job." He grunted. "This is what I get for starting college late."

"Well, stop your moping, Mr. Bachelor. I still have a paper to do for Mr. Stein's class. The sooner we get this done, the faster I can finish my paper."

"Aye, captain." He gave me a salute and walked away.

I watched as Zeus jogged his way across the street and into the church. I sighed quietly and closed my eyes, reviewing the plan in my head.

Our customer is Clark Chasee, a 27 year old French business man. Our enemy is Leaa Heikkinen, a 24 year old Finnish doctor, who-in his words-is controlling, manipulative and utterly obsessed with him. The marriage was not his doing; it was planned by his wonderful parents who believed that this pair was a match made in a place better than heaven, specifically the Bahamas.

Poor guy.

We've never really met him in person. He preferred to have his physical identity to remain hidden until the wedding day. The reason...we don't know. Must be some skin condition. We talked to him over the phone and online. During one of our conversations, Clark was able to come up with a new and thrilling way of escaping. We were faced with a new strategy that is both exciting and hard to pull off. His plan was simple, but contained many holes for errors to occur. Somehow, he was able to convince us that it would work out in the end, and we foolishly fell into his trap.

No wonder he's a businessman.

But, I have to admit, the plan isn't as bad as it sounds. The thrill and danger involved is also a plus. The only thing that troubles me is the constant "what ifs" that go through my head. What if everything goes wrong? What if we make a mistake?

After all, I've never really kidnapped someone before, even if it's fake.

The plan was simple. Rosalyn and Zeus are the "kidnappers" while Clark is the "kidnapped victim". At 10 A.M., the two will barge into the men's dressing room, take the tall and brown-haired man, presumably Clark, and bring him to the car. Then, we'll drive off to Clark's cabin in the woods. His best man, Dax, will act as the "witness" and proclaim that the groom was kidnapped, therefore stopping the wedding. By then, we would have gotten the money and be long gone. Clark said that since his "kidnapping" will be in the news, he would be forced to flee to a place where his parents can't find him. As for our identity, he promised that Dax will give the police a fake description of our appearance and our getaway car. If this all goes perfectly well, we would have accomplished our greatest scheme ever.

The side door opened and two figured slipped in, hauling an unconscious man in a suit.

"Drive," said Rosalyn. "But, don't hurt my baby. She's brand new, so drive carefully but fast."

"How the hell do I drive carefully and fast?" I wondered. "No one drives carefully and fast. If they drive fast, they are probably going to be reckless. If they drive carefully, they're probably going twenty five miles per hour." I backed out of the parking spot.

"Just imagine that you're James Bond. He drives fast, doesn't get into any life-threatening accidents and looks hot doing it," she suggested.

I rolled my eyes and drove down the street. "What happened to him?" I asked, glancing at the sleeping man through the rear-view mirror.

Zeus shifted nervously. "Well, I didn't know that someone was behind the dressing room door. When I opened it, I accidentally hit him in the head, knocking him out." He raised his hands. "I didn't mean to. I swear. I just hope he won't have a fit when he wakes up."

I nodded. "How do you know we have the right guy?"

Rosalyn snorted. "Ivy, Clark said he would be in the dressing room at 10 A.M. Plus, he said that he's tall and has brown hair." She pointed to the man next to her. "Coincidence?"

"Alright, I get it." I fixed my attention back onto the road. "So, fast food anyone?"

We were driving for about an hour when Clark woke up. Zeus had taken the wheel earlier, with Rosalyn seating shotgun. This arrangement left me sitting at the back, watching over Clark. He groaned loudly, rubbing his eyes with his hands. He slowly opened them, squinting at the sunlight.

It took him about five seconds before he screamed bloody murder.

"What the hell!" Rosalyn shouted. She glared at the man.

"Where the hell am I!" he hollered, glaring at everyone with his cerulean eyes.

"We're about five miles away from your cabin. It will probably take us another five minutes to get there," replied Zeus, unfazed from the screaming.

"What?" he asked.

"He said we will arrive at your cabin in five minutes," I repeated.

"Cabin? What are you talking about?"

"We are talking about your private cabin in the middle of the woods, where we were suppose to go after we kidnapped you," said Rose.

The man stared at us, scrunching his eyebrows. He opened his mouth to speak, but suddenly closed it before he can utter a word. His eyes brightened, realization dawning. His mouth formed a perfect "O" and he stared at us with an amused expression. He barked out laughing, clutching his stomach. Rosalyn and I glanced at each other, clearly thinking that this guy was crazy. He pounded on the car door, causing me to jump up from my seat. Clearly, luck wasn't with me at the moment for he saw my movement, causing him to play another round of "laughing dolt". I blushed and glared at him.

I hated him already.

"You guys, the infamous UKC, have managed to fail your first 'kidnap' scheme," he exclaimed, chuckling in between words.

"What are you talking about?" asked Rosalyn.

"The famous UKC, an organization that boasts flawless plans, has finally made an error. The tragedy!" he continued, ignoring her question.

"Hey-," I began.

"The horror! This should be-"

"He-"

"-in the news. News flash! UKC-"

"H-"

"-has finally reached its lowest point-"

"HEY!" I poked his chest with my finger. "Listen here, you interrupt me again and I'll throw you out the window!" I screamed, irritated and frustrated.

He grinned, slowly inched up toward me and whispered quietly, "Are you willing to follow through with that offer, princess?"

He was rolling across the road, clumsily and stupidly, thirty seconds later.

"He is going to chop us and sell our livers to teenage delinquents," Rosalyn exclaimed, twiddling her thumbs.

I nodded, too irked and balked to answer her. We were driving back to the church. After I threw the man out of the car and retrieved him, we finally learned that we "kidnapped" the best man instead of Clark. Apparently, Clark spoke to him on the phone, telling him that he was going to be late and to inform us on his tardiness. However, that message never reached us since Zeus knocked Dax out before he can tell us.

We are so screwed.

I peeked over at our passenger, who was busily patching up a cut with a small bandage. He must have felt my heated glance for he looked up and met my eyes. I looked at him, observing his sculpted facial features and his piercing ocean eyes. He remained expressionless before giving me a scowl.

I smirked menacingly.

"You guys are so screwed for 'kidnapping' the best man instead of the groom. And, for hurting said best man to the point where his beautiful face might be so bruised up, that the ladies will be unable to recognize his stunning features," he said, fixing his twig infested hair.

"Oh, her ye, her ye, let thy kingdom know that His Majesty has suffered a terrible illness, known commonly as 'Thy monstrous ego syndrome.' Let us sing a song by famous medieval rapper Snup Doug called 'Drop thee like thy hot' to make thy illness disappear," I mocked.

"Oh, how thoughtful of you. I didn't know you cared about me so much that you are willing to sing for me, princess."

"Whatever. Just please stay a good feet away from me so I won't be infected from your…dirtyness and egoness." I'm not sure if they are even real words.

"What makes you think that I'm the sick and dirty one here?"

"Well, for starters, you are covered in dirt. Second, you smell like dried mud and leaves."

"And whose fault is that?"

"It sure isn't mine. I mean, you were the one invading my personal space. My actions were just part of my natural self-defense mechanism."

"Your natural reaction is to open the car door and shove people out? Interesting."

"Okay, love birds, you guys can stop arguing now," interrupted Zeus.

"Well, we wouldn't be having this argument if she hadn't pushed me out of a moving car," cried Dax.

"Enough!" yelled Rose. She turned around in her chair, facing both of us. She gave us a reprimanding look, as if we were children fighting over a doll. "Would you two please be quiet? I am using my brain power here to figure out another plan. By now, the wedding should be done, so we can't use our traditional plan. I need to think of something that we can do during the reception." She pointed at Dax. "Where will the reception be?"

"Cherry Blossom Buffet. 6354 Hayfield Avenue. Just off the 98 Highway. Exit at Thorn Boulevard, make a right at Hayfield and the restaurant should be on your left."

"Thanks, but we just needed the address." She patted the car's dashboard. "This baby has a GPS," she bragged, watching Zeus as he typed in the address.

I rolled my eyes. "We can see that Rose, no need to make other people feel so poor that their car doesn't have such advanced technology."

She stuck out her tongue. I copied her action. It only took us a few seconds before we burst out laughing. Dax raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow, which was returned by my casual shrug.

"Ladies, I believe that we should continue on planning," said Zeus, listening to the GPS while its monotonous voice directed him. Rosalyn and I nodded in agreement, and both of us returned to our thoughts.

Silence filled the car, the hum of the air conditioner lulling us down. I gazed out of the window, appreciating the beautiful scenery. The sun's rippling reflection glinted on the ocean waters. Birds flew above the humongous clouds and the cool, summer breeze blew at the tall coconut tress.

"Is this your fist time seeing the ocean?" guessed a voice.

I turned around and faced Dax, who was giving me a small grin. Surprised, I returned it before gazing back out at the sea.

"Well, this is the first time I saw it this way. I've lived in the country all my life. The only time I left was when I started going to college. After two years of being here, this is probably my second time seeing it."

He nodded and quietly returned back to his thoughts. I stared at him, wondering how he can be so tame after seeing his wild side. On the contrary, the same thing can be said about me, shouting accusations one minute and sitting like an angel the next. A small smile grew on my face. I watched the scene fly by, fully aware of a young man staring at me.

The car screeched to a stop in front of the Cherry Blossom Buffet at exactly 12:03 P.M.

We got out of the car and marched toward the entrance, hostage in hand. A waiter stood a few feet from the door, a stack of menus in his hand and a hostile expression on his face. With Zeus leading, we walked past the man, clearly ignoring his rants. He caught up with us before Zeus can open the door.

"Sir, I'm going to have to get your names and invitations," said the waiter, wrinkling his nose in disgust. I glanced at our appearances, noting Dax's dirty suit.

"I don't think that is necessary," replied Dax, moving Zeus aside.

"Sir, it's our protocol." The waiter pointed to an elder gentleman, who was conversing with a young man. "If you want to complain, talk to the manager."

Rolling his eyes, Dax searched his pocket, pulling out a crumpled wedding invitation. He gave it to the man, who promptly checked its credibility. Nodding in satisfaction, the waiter gave it back to Dax and pulled out a clipboard, a list of names written on a sheet of paper.

Oh, sugar cookies.

"Names?" he asked, monotonously.

"Dax Richards, Evelyn Halifax, Reynard Brown, and Andrea King," Dax answered, without stuttering.

I shot Rosalyn a confused stare. She simply shrugged and focused her attention on the waiter, who was currently crossing out the given names. I glanced at Zeus, his arms crossed and his foot tapping impatiently at the ground. He noticed my gaze, and turned to face me. Detecting my expression, he motioned to the men's room inside the restaurant, gazing at it longingly as if it was beckoning him. I scoffed and shook my head.

Only Zeus would need to use the bathroom at a time like this.

Finally, the waiter finished, motioning for us to enter the restaurant. Giving him a small thank you, Dax led the way inside. Upon opening the door, Zeus rushed in, passed a few customers, and entered the restroom. I could picture him pumping his fist in the air in victory.

What can I say, he has his blonde moments.

"Well…follow me, I guess," Dax said, focusing on the privy door.

"Don't worry, he'll find us," reassured Rose.

Nodding, he proceeded to make his way through the restaurant. Waving through the crowd, we made our way to the groom, who was currently in the hands of the enemy. Leaa was dressed in a pastel dress, having changed out of her wedding gown. She was clutching Clark's arm tightly, to the point where it seemed it would break. I winced, unconsciously rubbing my right arm.

"Clark!" cried Dax, waving his hand in the air.

Hearing his name, he turned to face us. He was a gorgeous man, his tall frame and brown hair catching my attention. I turned to Dax, noting his tall frame and brown hair. I slapped my forehead, wondering why Clark didn't give us a more vivid description of him. If he had, we wouldn't have kidnapped the wrong man, and he wouldn't be stalking toward us with a murderous expression.

Dear God, please let me enter the gates of heaven. I'll bring cookies.

He stopped right in front us, carefully observing our appearance. He took a deep breath.

"Tell me, why wasn't I kidnapped and taken away from my wedding?" he calmly asked.

"Well…" Rosalyn started.

"Don't well me!" he shouted quietly. "I had to suffer under the hands of the she-devil for the past few hours! Now tell me, how did the plan backfire?"

I was about to answer him, but Dax beat me to it.

"Long story, but the revised version is that I was knocked unconscious before I could tell them that you were going to be late," Dax started. "They thought 'I' was 'you', therefore kidnapping me."

"How the hell-"

"We don't have time for explanations." I interrupted. I jerked my head towards Leaa, who was marching towards us. "You want her out of your life? Let me take care of it. Just think of this as repayment for our mistake."

I nodded at Rosalyn, who caught the mischievous gleam in my eye. I walked away from them, heading towards a stage at the end of the restaurant. A hand reached out and pulled my arm, stopping me. Dax gripped it tightly, strong enough to stop me from escaping. He raised an eyebrow, giving me a curious expression.

"What are you planning?" he asked, excitement dripping from his voice.

I grinned at him innocently. "Just a little gimmick that will lighten up this party." I leaned towards him, my face inches away from his. "Whatever happens, just go along with it." I leaned away, smirking at his dazed expression, before sauntering my way to my destination.

I stepped onto the platform and strolled towards the microphone. I tapped it, grimacing from the loud screech that emitted from the speakers. I looked at the audience, their eyes trained at me. I cleared my throat.

"Hello? Hello," I said into the microphone, testing it.

I looked back at Dax, who was beside Clark, and gave him a wink. Leaa was right next to her husband, looking at me suspiciously. I tapped the microphone once more, making sure that it was working. Satisfied, from both the audience's attention and the microphone's function, I began to speak.

"Ladies and gentlemen, let me tell you a story. There once was a little bunny rabbit named er…Bunny and his girlfriend named… Buns. Bunny didn't like Buns, but his parents did, which was the reason why they're together in the first place. Then, out of nowhere, his parents decided to make Bunny marry Buns. You see, his parents were like a jack-in-a-box. They're all square and stiff in the outside, but sooner or later they want to burst out and get silly. It was during their 'silly time' that they decided to make their child marry his girlfriend.

"Obviously, Bunny was unhappy. He was going to be married to a horrible bunny rabbit and he didn't like it. There was no damsel in distress to rescue him now, probably because it was her day off. He was so depressed that he decided to be friends with Barney and overdosed himself with Nesquick and Trix."

I pointed to Clark, a twisted expression on his face, as if he can't decide whether to laugh or cry.

"Look at that poor man! Do you think he wanted to marry that banshee?" I pointed to a fuming Leaa. "Do you think he wants to spend the rest of his life with her? No, he doesn't!"

I jumped off the stage and landed on the table in front of it. "If you don't want Clark to end up like Bunny, let him divorce that woman! Let him take back his vows and his dignity! Let him have his freedom to choose whomever he wants to marry!" I raised a fist in the air. "Let him live the crazy life! Livin' la vida loca!"

The audience roared in applause, both amused and disturbed from my speech.

"Who do you think you are!" cried a screeching voice.

I searched for the voice's owner, inwardly grimacing as Leaa stalked her way towards me. She was livid, her eyes burning in anger and her mouth snarling at me. I gulped, silently praying that she won't murder me. I looked at my friends, who were accompanied by Clark and Dax. Rose and Dax gave me a reassuring smile, while Clark simply stared at me in shock. Zeus, having returned from the bathroom, waved at me, as if these were my last moments on Earth.

What an idiot.

Leaa finally reached me, with her hands on her hips. She glared viciously, twitching her eye.

"Who do you think you are," she repeated, more firmly.

"I am a girl," I retorted, a few chuckles coming from the crowd.

"I'm not dumb! How dare you suggest that Clark didn't want to marry me!"

"Well, he didn't really."

"No, he does! He loves me and only me! He will never leave me and runaway with you!"

I let out a long sigh. "Lady, you have it all wrong. I don't want to be with him nor does he want to be with me. I am merely stating that he didn't want to marry you, therefore giving him the right to divorce you."

She screeched in frustration. "That's absurd! He wanted to marry me. He will never file for a divorce!"

I shook my head, irritated from her thick-headedness. "He has many reasons to divorce you."

"Oh, please. Give me one reason why he should divorce me," she cried.

I smirked at her, confident in my answer. "Because Chuck Norris said so."

Cue in kiddy theme song.

The crowd erupted in laughter, adding fuel to Leaa's anger. She promptly left and approached her husband, punching his chest in frustration. He held her hands, stopped her attacks and dragged her through the crowd. He briefly stopped in front of an older couple, who followed him as they made their way out of the restaurant. I watched as their silhouettes disappeared behind the entrance door and out of my view.

"Wait! I have another reason why he should divorce you!" I pointed to the blue-eyed best man. "Dax is his lover!"

A loud growl was heard. "IVY!"

Dear God, I'll bring ice cream, too.

A couple months later...

"Where is he?" I cried, gazing longingly at the delicious food.

"He'll be here in a minute," replied Rosalyn, checking her phone again.

I grunted impatiently. "If your boyfriend isn't here in ten seconds, I am going to eat all that food. I can't wait any longer!"

The door bell rang, a squeal escaping Rosalyn's mouth. "Well, you don't need to start your countdown anymore."

I raced to the table. I grabbed a chicken leg, not wasting my time munching on it. The juicy meat satisfied my taste buds, making my appetite stronger. After finishing it, I continued to stuff my mouth with any food I could reach. I was about to bite down on a piece of garlic bread when it was snatched out of my hand. I watched as the thief's mouth took a bite from it, chomping on the food until it all disappeared. I glared at the man, and took another piece from the plate, only for it to be stolen again.

"Hey! You already ate one," I protested.

"Well, I wanted another one," replied Dax, smirking at my expression.

"You could have grabbed one from the plate instead of stealing it from me."

He shrugged. "I didn't feel like it."

I scoffed. "You're so lazy. No wonder you're getting fat."

"I am not fat!" He pulled his shirt up, showing his toned stomach.

"Hey love birds! It's only lunch and you're fighting already? Save that for later, because it's time to celebrate," said Zeus, who was taking out sodas from the fridge.

I marched toward Zeus, leaving Dax by himself, and grabbed a soda from his hand. I opened it and gulped down its contents, holding it tightly. I pulled a chair from the table and sat down, with everyone else following suit. Rosalyn sat right across from me, with Clark holding her hand. Zeus sat to my left and started to eat from his plate. Dax plopped down on my right, grabbing a soda for himself.

Clark stood up from his chair, grabbed a plastic knife and tapped the side of his soda.

"Attention, fellow men and women," he started. "Today marks an important part of history, specifically mine. Today we celebrate my freedom from the witch." He held his soda can up high. "Let us raise our cans in victory, for the successful crashing of my wedding to my divorce!"

"Let's toast for Chuck Norris!" cried Zeus.

We laughed in unison, tapped our sodas together and finished them. I placed my soda on the table, wincing as Zeus burped aloud. I slapped his head, lecturing him on his manners. Of course, he retorted that he didn't say 'Excuse me' yet. Our argument continued on until he finally gave up, mumbled an 'Excuse me', and started eating again.

I felt Dax elbow my stomach softly. I glanced at him, an impatient expression on my face. "Well, isn't that sweet," he whispered, motioning towards Clark and Rosalyn, who were currently looking at each other lovingly and fondly.

I wrinkled my nose. "Eww… they look like my parents."

"Really? I didn't know your parents were Ken and Barbie." He grabbed my hand and held it beneath the table, his attention focused on the couple in front of us. "When do you think we're going to be like them? I mean, they've been dating for a short time, and yet they are all so... lovey-dovey."

I stared at him in shock. "Are you saying that you want to be all googly-eyed and lovey-dovey?" I gave him a menacing glare. "Who are you?"

He gave a small chuckle and brushed the hair out of my face. "I'm your boyfriend," he replied.

"Unfortunately," I mumbled.

He gave me a reprimanding look. "I'm not saying that I want to," he continued. "It's just…I heard that all couples go through it, and I just want to know when it will catch on us so that I can prepare for it."

"And what makes you think that it will catch us?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. It's just a feeling that I have, probably my man instinct. Besides, I'm curious as to how you would act when you're all lovey-dovey on me."

"Please, that will never happen to me. I'm too mature to act on such childish actions."

"But what if it does happen?"

"The only time it will happen is in your dreams…or when the world ends because of flying cows."

He smirked at me. "Well then, I guess that I'll have to keep on dreaming, right?"

I mirrored his expression flawlessly. "Right."

Then, I stared at him with loving eyes and gave him a kiss.