Sorry, this isn't a (direct) flame/bash/massive hate attack on Twilight and sequels or its fans. It isn't even on the author, publisher, directors, actors or actresses affiliated with the films. But it's not a heartwarming song of unending love and loyalty to it either. This is simply my opinion, unedited.(mostly)……… So, begin at the beginning. Hate messages will be printed and fed to the shredding machine.


"I $(&*#(*& Twilight!!" to "OMGEE I LURVE TWILGHT!!" I've heard it all. And as a semi-aspiring writer, I was motivated to write this:

My writing. It's missing something. See, I find myself in the middle. I'm not awesome writer, but I don't completely suck. I'm still missing that something. My plotlines are all right… I don't know. Though I guess if I knew what it was—I wouldn't be missing that something. I'd be awesome. "Awesome" while an opinion—I find that some writers are just on a higher level than me. They have that awesome quality that seems to enthrall everyone. Though some authors seem to be more popular than their writing level.

Take Stephenie Meyer. I'm not going to hardcore bash her or anything. I will say, I went through my phase of loving her books. It was way, way before the hoop-la of movies—the beginning years of Twilight. My phase ended about when the scandal of Midnight Sun popped up. (If you don't know the story—it was pretty much going to be Edward's version of Twilight. It got leaked on the net, Meyer was all pissed and threatened to have it not published. I don't know if she's going to publish it and I dont care.) Not that the whole scandal thing was what ended my love—I was outraged. But my passion for the quadrilogy died out sometime [soonish] after that.

Do I hate Twilight with a fiery passion that would bend all heaven and earth in my raging path of hatred? No. Sorry, but A) I don't have enough energy to hate something that much. B) I used to like it, now I don't. Why? It could be the raging fandom, it could be the fact that my shoes are too tight or my heart's a couple sizes too small. But it's probably because like 80% of the hobbies in my life, I got bored of it. Moved on, got interested in something else. You know what happened to the books that I did own? I use it to keep my bed level, along with the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants and the last season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

The movies are a straight-up money-sucking farce. That is what I think. But at the same time, some things you can't transfer from pages to a screen. So of course the movies are going to be different than the book. The one thing the movies did do for me—I appreciated Jacob—the werewolf—more. In the book I thought of him as the annoying side character who butted into the main romance. I felt a connection with him in the movie. He gets stuck in the friend zone by the woman he loves only to be cock-blocked by a dead guy. What male that's ever been in love can't empathize with that?

So why do I like Twilight—why did I ever like it? Pretty much all my friends hate Twilight with a passion, claimed to have never liked it or because of the raging fandom theirs just seems minuscule when compared. Honestly? Because that's what I like. Supernatural romance—it's got its own genre at your local library/Barnes and nobles/borders/internets. See? I didn't even use a lame cop out like "Because I'm a chick". Some girls hate twilight with a scorching passion that would have the sun putting on a layer of lotion.

The way that it's written is just all right. It's not fantastic but I have seen much, much worse. If you like supernatural romance; underfunded schools/libraries/old bookstores have some novels that look like they were written the day after Marti Gras—that the author was still mostly drunk and half-assed so much it left enough plot holes to make Swiss cheese jealous. (Or a redneck whistle with pride, pick your analogy.) Some pages are even printed in books upside down—I shit you not.

So if Meyer's writing is only so-so, why the hell is it so damn popular? I don't know. Maybe it's all a subconscious intergalactic plot to integrate strange things in society so by the time we're invaded by aliens we'll be so bored of vampires and the like we'll be begging to be enslaved. There's a hell of a lot of "maybe's" that I'm too lazy to come up with.

So, this is the first and last installment of "Confessions of a (Maybe) Ex-Twilighter". I hope you at least got something out of this—had it been even something to do for ten seconds while you're waiting for your mac and cheese to be done in the microwave or a something to laugh at. Kindly review.

Maybe this will totally be ignored and absolutely nothing will come of this. Ha, we can only hope.

XOXOXO