The Recordings of Tye J. Jacks
"-Haha, dude, seriously. I could've fucked that girl into the fucking ground if her pa didn't come home."
"Oh, whatever Jason." Cough cough… "Pass the joint."
"Mm, who is sitting on your door step?"
"Wha- Holy fuck…"
Door opening, sound of someone tripping then a rush of air
"Jane? Jane Peterson?"
I was once told that writing down my feelings would help me deal with the situation better and let me have a clearer mind or whatever that shit means. I thought that they were just talking some shit but whatever. Though, here I am writing down my feelings in my order to help me deal with a situation. Though really this journal is like a really big letter to you. Since you are going to be the only one to read it, at least I am hoping you are going to be the only one to read it but I would understand if you would want to share some stuff in here with your college roommate or your mother or maybe even John Doe but I have to warn you now, I am going to go into detail.
I told myself when I thought of this, when I started to edit my recordings, when I bought this fucking journal that I am not going to leave anything out. Nothing.
So right now, as you are reading this in your dorm room, or maybe even your bedroom, I hope you have the first CD I put in this package in your CD player or your computer and have just finished listening to the first track of the CD then paused because that is what I had said to do on the package, to listen then read.
This first recording is of me and my friend Jason, yes we were high but the main point of that recording is that you came back. You were gone for an entire year, just up and left without so much of a letter. I was pissed at you, so fucking mad that you did that. I wasn't just mad that you left me but that you were strong enough to leave me. I was so fucking mad when I went to your house and your parents told me that you were going to be gone for a while. I was pissed. I remember pushing your father aside and running up the stairs thinking that they were just hiding you but nope, all of your shit was gone. Just a bed and a dresser left in your room. I was so mad.
I think I broke your mail box but what can I say I was mad.
I hated that you were given a way out. That when the shit had hit the fan and you were scared that you had a way out and you took it then left me by myself to sink or swim.
"Jane." "When did you get back?"
"Today. I got back an hour ago."
"Where have you been?"
"You look clean…"
"In more than one way. I got clean after… you know."
"No, I fucking don't know. I just remember you leaving. You skipping out. YOU FUCKING LEAVING ME!"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!"
"NO! Jesus, what the hell do you think you can just walk back into my life like this!" smashing noise "Fucking hell."
"Tye… I have missed you… Every day… all day. I missed you Tyler."