Any sort of plot is going to be put on temporary hold as I pummel you with epic fighting scenes, comedy, and slice-of-life moments. Maybe. I'm trying to go Gurren Lagan for this but I'm not too sure I'm going to pull it off.


ITEM War

Prologue

"Have you ever felt bored by the world? I don't mean something like simple things like lying around the house just because your TV is broken. I mean genuinely bored of everything. In fact, one could call it a disillusionment rather than mere boredom. Day in, day out, same things over and over. Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever felt the emotions literally slipping out of your shell you call a body? Well, have you? Of course you have. That is the nature of you beings after all. You all either get so run down in that rut that you no longer care, or you see that rut and realize, you can't get out. So, in a fit of rebellion, you stay still. However, you and I both know how absolutely boring that is. Now don't deny it. Being in a rut isn't anything bad, if you like that sort of thing. But you and I both know that you hate it. It is an absolute bore. In a fit of desperation, you try to go out of the rut. Unfortunately, you just made another rut to fall into. I don't blame you really. I mean, you are only human. You are only capable of so much. Up until you fail of course.

"Now don't get me wrong. I am not here to tell you how much your life sucks. I am not here to tell you that your life is better off rotting in some ditch. I am not telling you that you are already rotting in some ditch. Oh perish the thought. I'm merely offering you perspective. I know how fickle humans are, denying everything. Sure you thought of these thoughts before, but how do I know you actually voiced them? What's the difference? Well for one thing, you can't hear them without a sound. You need to hear it. You need to hear that monotonous life grinding out. So, do you hear those dull gears? Of course you do.

"But like I said, this is not me saying how much of a loser you are. This is me saying, I have a way out. All you do to obtain it is to say yes. Oh, but maybe you're worried that this might be dangerous. It isn't, normally. Admittedly, things can go terribly wrong, and by terribly wrong, I mean you die. However, you shouldn't be worried about that, it's a rare thing. Furthermore, if you get really good, you probably won't die. Maybe. Possibly. But anyways, the point is, are you in? Yes? Good then. Well, now just calm down. Next, you need to choose something, let me show you what I mean. Take a look at my wares kid, you got a sword, a piece of ice, a small flame, a little tree, a slip of paper. Choose what? Oh, it doesn't matter, choose anything. Ok, you got something? Good. Now don't panic, but I'm going to need to do THIS! Oh, see, that wasn't so bad. It hurt's a bit? Well yeah I mean I just plunged my hand down into your soul. Oh don't be in such a panic. It's not as if I hurt it. You don't even know what your soul looks like. All I just did was put something there. You'll be up and at it eventually. Now here's a little pamphlet you probably need, it won't explain everything but it will say some boring introductory stuff. Oh, and before I go…

"WELCOME TO ITEM WAR!"