Necrophilia

I feel my heart pound against my ribs.

I feel my tongue run across my lips

Dissension of the senses from the will

Decays all ability of repression.

I tried:

If it ever mattered.

I tried.

Do you feel my hunger in the dark?

Do you feel my lust curled in your bed?

Like some injured animal, I moan for you-

My master, you're my master (it's true)

I am enslaved by you.

I am caged for you:

By these affections

And twisted love.

How I want to keep you between my arms

To hide you from pain and harm.

How I want to destroy every bit of you:

Every bit I am meant to never have.

I vacillate in your doorway.

Do you see me?

Did you ever see me?

You're scared.

I'm sorry.

The clock plays the rhythm as I start my dance.

You watch me, enrapt and entranced.

I draw the final twists and turns

As you draw your final breath.

I tried.

(If it ever mattered)

I loved.

(If it ever meant anything)

And you're dead.

And I feel stupid.

But

I

Can't

Kill

My

Self.

(nor my love).