A Lust for Blood
This street leads to nowhere; the ominous shadows of the towering houses are infinite. Blood is flowing through my veins like sweet ecstasy; pleasure is exploding and travelling to every part of my body. I begin to struggle, breathing heavily like an aged smoker as I drop to my knees.
The shadows disappear and now there is only nothingness... nothingness and me, Lee Williams, crouched in a black void, drunk on a mysterious feeling. I look up, hoping for some sort of indication to what is happening to me. Perhaps God is unleashing his holy damnation at my expense. I see no signs but instead I find myself staring at a women's face, sinister and sexy, the face is staring back at me... laughing horrifically, scaring me but also strangely comforting me.
The face now has a body, slender and fine and walking towards me, ready to strike. I'm drowning from the inside; I shrivel up like a useless sponge and find myself defenceless as the women leaps onto me.
Pain suddenly flows throughout my whole body, a polluted river full of white blood cells screaming for mercy as they fail to do their job. The woman shouts "Death has come for you," and I awake in a pool of sweat and fear.
I look at my phone, the time is 7.07 PM. I must have passed out, it had been a hot day and as usual I'd had nothing better to do but drink myself to sleep, all alone in my apartment.
That nightmare was awful; the woman's face is now forever stuck in my mind, sending shivers up my aching back. The woman had razor sharp teeth peeking out of her perfect lips and even though the woman was clearly dangerous I had an overwhelming temptation to kiss her all over.
She had done something to me, infected me with some sort of disease, my body ached all over and I was sure if I hadn't awoke I would have died in my sleep and the worst part about that is, no one would care.
It's the middle of winter, the month of January so it's rather dark outside. I get up of my uncomfortable sofa and peer out the window through my cheap blinds, the streets are empty, not a soul in sight. The street lights are shining dully and one of them is flickering off and on creating an eerie atmosphere. The noise of the wind is faintly blowing through the night sky. I look up; the moon is huge and full, lighting up the sky.
I feel dreadful and have felt this way for weeks, ever since the divorce I just haven't had a reason to smile. I know just how to get rid of this feeling so I put on my jacket and venture out into the night to the local pub, alcohol seems to be the only thing that can push my worries and self pity away.
The local pub is called 'A glassful of lust.' Strange name but the staff are friendly and the beer is cheap. The neighbourhood isn't great but I can't complain, what with me living in the roughest flat block in the whole damn city. The pub is run by a guy named Dave, people say he is crazy, he was in prison for years, no one knows why but apparently he used to be quite a nice man before going to the joint but I guess being locked up will do that to a man, drive you completely crazy, the constant fear of being attacked and the overwhelming loneliness. Perhaps that's what I want, to be locked away as if I never existed.
I walk for a solid half hour, its freezing and my jacket isn't doing a great job of keeping me warm. I'm relieved when I finally enter through the doors to the pub; the warmth fills my body quickly. It's surprisingly empty for a Saturday night and in a way I'm glad, I prefer being alone.
The pub is lit by a faint red bulb. Clouds of smoke travel around ready to rain on peoples lungs. There is an old man sitting at a table in the corner near the toilets, the sickening stench of urine is travelling through the air and forcing itself into my system, I can't help but think the smell is coming from the man and not the toilets. The only other person in the bar besides the old man is a bartender.
I stay for a while and drink a few pints. I bathe in self pity until finally I've had enough to drink and sweet sensations start to fill me up from toe to head. I don't notice the stench of piss anymore and my life starts to look hopeful again but deep inside I know this feeling won't last for long. After the alcohol wears off I'll be near suicidal again.
I really don't have anything to live for. No job, no girlfriend, my kids don't even want to see me and I've wasted 9 years of my goddamn life with a woman who never loved me in the first place. I remember my wedding day; a tear slips out my eye and slides down my face.
It's 12.56 AM and the bar is closing, the old man left about an hour ago and now the waitress is shooing me off home. I exchange drunken profanities and stumble out the entrance and begin to wobble up the street.
In my drunken state I decide to take a shortcut home, under a subway tunnel and through an alley. I walk (or at least I try) through the deserted subway tunnel, the tunnel's circular walls are smothered with graffiti. One of the sentences sticks out to me.
'Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for you are with me.' I scream at the top of my voice "Yeah?! Well lucky you! Who do I have to protect me, huh? To comfort me?! I'm destined to live and die alone!." My own screams echo through the tunnel, giving me goose bumps. Fear begins to take control and send me insane.
A sensation in my gut warns me what is coming next; all of a sudden I'm bent over as vomit flies out of my mouth like a bullet. It doesn't stop and I'm positive it never will until it does and I'm left with an aching in my throat and lumps in my mouth, the taste is rotten and I know there is more left to come.
From the far end of the tunnel I hear a loud thump as someone falls from outside and starts to stride towards me. Great shadows fill up the tunnel, created by the lone, yellow light hanging. Images from the nightmare I had the previous day begin to flood my mind, the women's face haunts me and before I know it, that very same women is here in this tunnel with me, within walking distance. A riot starts in my head, something is telling me to run, my conscience perhaps? Up until now I was sure I didn't have one. I'm frozen, I won't thaw and before I know it the woman is standing over me like some sort of god.
The sweet death I've longed for these few weeks has finally come.