I met him a few months ago, he acted tough and dangerous, but he'd never do anything unprovoked, I noticed that the first week of being around him. Maybe I just wanted to see what he could do, and that's why I made it my personal mission to be a thorn in his side, or maybe he just irks me, pretending he's innocent, the good guy. He always waited to be attacked before he'd act, no matter how bothersome the person, and even then he rarely resorted to physical violence. However, provoking him is a fine art; it takes weeks to get on his nerves. He's a challenge, but maybe he's only appealing because he pretends to hate me, he always did. If he really hated me, he wouldn't keep coming back to my snide remarks and childish pranks, would he?

The most enjoyable part of my provocations is that they release little details about him; he'll let things slip when he's bitching without noticing. Because of this, I like to think I know a lot about him, also because it annoys him more than anything else. In that retrospect, we're alike, too afraid to let others in, too afraid to let ourselves out. It makes me curious, people aren't naturally afraid; they have to be damaged first. Which makes us, as a whole, stupid; who waits around to get hurt? I wonder who hurt him.

Honestly, I'm scared he'll leave one day, because of me, because of the things I say. It's also why I can't ask him directly about his closed off wounds that I keep stabbing at. Frankly, I've never really had anyone to call a friend; he's the closest I've ever gotten. I suppose it is unusual, since he resists the urge to punch me in the face daily, while I sit there begging him to. I chock up my lack of social life to my personality, as you can probably tell it needs some work; I'm kind of a magnet for people's fists. So, I guess my 'dark/pleasant' fantasy is: I want him to stay. If you ever tell anyone I said that, I'll kill you.