you've kept me up 'til sunrise,
your ragged fingers running down my spine,
whispering secrets to each vertebrae.
the nasty things you've done and
have yet to reveal,
the real reason your eyes don't close at night,
how you've loved me since the day you saw me.
you've pried my lungs open, blown
kisses until the air reeks of sweat
and lust and broken moans-stifled
with a pillow and a clenched fist.
i closed my eyes, sat up,
the spins gracing me, though my mouth was dry
and had been all night. you were there to catch it,
catch me,
dip me in your arms and lay my
dripping body back beneath the sheets.
you lick my lips and tell me my life story
like you lived it, not me.
like you lied as a child,
carved "jealousy" into your right thigh
on your fourteenth birthday, tears and
blood,
like you lived the broken life
written in my notebooks.
you lie here beside me, you
stupid
gray
girl
and you never let me sleep.


insomnia-rampant. written in precisely ten minutes.
4:20am-4:30am