i just want to
curl up in a cowardly ball
lie on the rain-soaked ground
and sob. cry til i
can't breathe,
til i've drowned myself in sorrow
the way you drown in alcohol.

and then maybe i'll sink
into the earth and never
sing again. or maybe i'll
get back up and walk away,
return to robotic peace.

but i guess we'll never know.