The Passion of St. Tatiana by ff_b

They said that she was in an zoo exhibit, but Tatiana knew better. She was in a prison, and while she had been bred and born in captivity, her genes and her very wildness spoke to her of a life of freedom that had been denied her and which she would never know. Yes, she was fed and her health was cared for...but things were distinctly unnatural, and that which is not natural is never right.

Then there were the pink skins, the hyoomans, those weak but clever naked apes who had somehow confined her to this small space. They stood in what they thought was a place of safety and brazenly stared at her...how rude! Didn't the pinkies know that to stare at an alpha predator was to challenge them? Tatiana recognized that the pinkies were ignorant fools, however. As long as they confined their disrespect to staring, she would ignore their insolence. She would not trouble herself with them as long as they kept their distance and left her alone; they weren't worth it.

They clearly weren't animal lovers; some of the pinkies were that, and they represented the best of their kind. But these three did not come to the San Francisco Zoo out of interest in or love for animals; no, they came with darker intent. They came to torment her...and they had chosen their time well. Late Xmas day in the afternoon, when the zoo was less busy, and soon to close. They thought that they could pursue their sadistic pleasures then without anyone knowing...and it would give them a rush and make them feel powerful to be able to inflict pain on a Siberian tiger, perhaps make her visibly and audibly mad.- After all, what could the tiger do about it?

Tatiana had no understanding or knowledge of slingshots, but she understood pain quite well. She also understood that she was under attack. The stones that stung her flesh brought the response that the three young intruders wanted, but also one that they hadn't anticipated, for they had clearly underestimated the tiger, who had been pushed beyond her limits. A moat and a twelve-foot fence later, Tatiana stood among her abusers...and she was not amused.

"Hello, Boyz!," thought Tatiana. "Wanna make this a little interesting?-Wanna get up close and personal?-Let's PARTY!," subverbalized Tatiana, as she made busy with the claws, teeth, and strength of a 350-lb. predator.

"Yowl!," screamed the young pinkies, "This sucks!-I want my Momma!-I want my lawyer!-Where's Security?" Tatiana dispatched one of the three punks and mauled the two others. These young whelps had crossed the line, and would be properly chastised, if they survived the instruction...for the wrath of the tiger is swift and terrible.

But security and the police came, as they tend to do...and Tatiana found herself facing a sizable group of armed hyoomans. Tatiana knew that this did not bode well for her, and would no doubt end badly. But today was a good day to die, thought Tatiana...better to die free than live as a slave...and perhaps they might remember her.

It was starting to remind Tatiana of the closing scene of "Fists of Fury" when Bruce Lee executed a flying leap towards a waiting row of gunmen, an execution squad, really. Bruce Lee's character died a warrior in that scene, and so did Tatiana as the guns went off and ended her life. Tatiana began to understand how St. Sebastian must have felt when his body was pierced with all those arrows.-Major bummer!

Tatiana went to furry heaven and was met at the gates by St. Francis of Assisi, the 12th century founder of the Franciscan Order, and the Patron Saint of animals...he embraced Tatiana warmly, and welcomed her to heaven...

...Francis wept...and Tatiana ascended into furry heaven and did sit on the right hand of God the Furry Father, from whence she did come to judge the quick and the dead.

"How long, O how long until thou art ready to receive your furry saints?," cried the furry elders seated about the Cosmic Avenger's throne, eager to open the Seven Furry Seals.

"Not quite yet," responded God the Furry Father.

"D'oh!," replied the seated furry saints, slapping their foreheads with their palms. Patience was not among their virtues, and they really liked to open things, especially surprises and presents.

...and in the times to follow, many wonders and miracles were attributed to the great Siberian tiger...the blind did walk and the lame did see, which they really had before, anyways...and all who called on the name of Tatiana, Tony the Tiger, or the Trix Rabbit were saved, unless they preferred to invest in the market, buy high-yielding bonds, or perhaps just blow their wad and stimulate the economy in the "Trickle Down" theory.

...May we be given eyes to see, ears to hear, paws to feel, and naughty yiffy body parts...Amen!

(Note:-This tail has NOT been approved by the Furry Elders!)