Holding on and on

To what I want to believe

I used to be alive

But it was probably just a dream

My sweet illusions

And shattered life

Addictive delusions

At the end of my own knife

Tear my world down around be

And leave me standing alone

Burn me to the ground

For a life I'd never known

So hold me tight

My dream ends tonight

Holding on and on

In a world that never ends

That used to stand still

For the things we left still to mend

I can't walk away

I'll stay with you

I ran the whole way here

I turned my back my whole life

Tear my world down around be

And leave me standing alone

Burn me to the ground

For a life I'd never known

So hold me tight

My dream ends tonight

Holding on and on

Even is this disaster

You think it could end

Tell me then, what happens after

I don't believe in love

Not in fighting

None of it can be right

When I see everyone dying

Tear my world down around be

And leave me standing alone

Burn me to the ground

For a life I'd never known

So hold me tight

My dream ends tonight

My faith is a razor blade

Deep in my own heart

Life is a race

And I'm stuck at the start

Tear my world down around me

I'll be dead when you get back

Maybe then they'll see me

Just like they used to

I lost the fight

Kill my dream tonight

Tear my world down around be

And leave me standing alone

Burn me to the ground

For a life I'd never known

So hold me tight

My dream ends tonight

A/N- so this is a song about (to me, you can interpret it in your own ways) chasing your dreams to the very edge, and you don't even know that your dreams have trapped you in a nightmare but you still naively hold onto hope even though it's put you in a desperate self-destructive downward spiral ... partially inspired by my self doubt and fear and partially by an amazing book by Hubert Selby Jr., Requiem For A Dream... yesh