What is it with girls and love? I honestly haven't got a clue. Neither do some of them, apparently. The first night my girlfriend and I had sex…well, actually right before, I told her that I loved her. And no, it wasn't just some line to get her in the sack. I had been thinking about it for some time. Maybe a month or two. Well, anyway, so I told her 'I love you', and do you want to know what she answered back, on the night that we had planned to go all the way? She said, 'yeah, me too'. And that was it. She kissed me right after and that was pretty much all she wrote. Goodbye virginity, for the both of us. I was a freshman then.

Now, I know that most guys don't complain when they get sex without the emotional attachment that comes along with bringing the 'L' word into a relationship. In fact, I certainly wasn't complaining when we had sex again the next day, or the day after that. But, I guess it's just because that was the first serious relationship I was in where the sex felt hollow. I don't know. Maybe I just thought things were supposed to be different.

We broke up after another month, still hooked up every now and then, but the hook ups ceased once she started dating the senior quarterback. That guy was such a prick. I'm glad he already graduated. Anyway, after Samantha, I decided to put the whole love thing on hold. And do you know what? The sex was so much better that way. I mean, really really better.

I'm not saying I turned into a total slut or anything, but let's just say I earned my share of experience. I didn't really date anyone else after Samantha. It was mainly just a bunch of flings every now and then, mostly at parties. Since freshman year, I've been hooking up with different girls, always mindful of protection, of course. And just so you won't think I'm a total jerk, the girls always knew I wasn't looking for a relationship. I was pretty honest about that right off the bat. Most of them didn't care.

Which brings me to this new one. Her name is Scarlet, Scarlet Cassidy Monroe, and she's beautiful. We really hit it off at James Phillip's party tonight. James Phillip, the senior who pretty much is in every sport and every club known to man. Most freshmen and sophomore boys despise the man because he's got a reputation of stealing girlfriends right from under them. Juniors tend to look the other way just because he hosts pretty cool parties. Lucky for me, I don't have to worry about the girlfriend-stealing part, not to mention the fact that I can hold my own against James, or any other senior for that matter.

I may be a junior, but I've cracked a few skulls. I don't mean that in the literal sense, of course. I'm on the soccer team and I'd probably be on the football team too if I wasn't failing my math class. I'm a big enough guy that no one scares me. I've gotten into fights with jocks, freaks, and even gangsters, and I have the scars to prove it. I keep my hair short just to show off the battle scars; that and it makes it so much easier to get ready. There's pretty much no need to comb.

Out of the ten fights I've been in since coming to Milton High, I only started four of them. Maybe. The other six happened because they accused me of stealing their girlfriends (not at the same time, of course). I told them they were fucking nuts, seeing as how stealing girlfriends implied that the girl was in a new relationship with me, which was never the case. I did sleep with them, though. Well, not all of their girlfriends. One of them just gave me a blowjob under the bleachers, and I only felt up the other one for a few minutes before her boyfriend walked in on us in the locker room.

That's one reason why I hate school. My reputation seems to be getting around, and fast I might add. Some of the underclassmen even compare me to James Philip, which I don't think is fair at all. I mean, he's a total dick. Sure he has cool parties, but he lies to girls so that they'll go out with him and then he can fuck them. Me, I just have sex with them, BUT I don't lead them on in any way other than the one night. You see, I have a system; and, the system works.

So anyway, back to this Scarlet Cassidy chick. She was apparently a new student at Milton, or at least she will be. Her family moved here about a week ago, right before spring break. She had convinced her dad, or her aunt, I don't really remember, to hold off on enrolling her so that she'd get two weeks off instead of one. That still didn't explain how she managed to get invited to James' party, but I wasn't complaining. She's hot. Petite body, blonde curls, gorgeous smile. Enough said.

I should probably clarify something: she's hot, but she's not girlfriend material. No one is. I'll probably just mess around with her for a bit and then be on my way. God, I hope she doesn't have a boyfriend because that would totally kill my trip.

"Nicolas?" She had her purse in her hand and looked about ready to cry as soon as she came out of the bathroom, cell phone in hand.

"Is, uh…is something wrong?"

"Do you think you can give me a ride home? My aunt called and I have to be home as soon as possible."

Shit. I really didn't want to leave the party yet. I wasn't even drunk. This chick had better be worth it. If I were to stay and keep looking, I could probably find another hot one. I saw a brunette eyeing me when I walked in. That being said, I didn't have much of a choice. I have to stick with the system. My system always works. "Sure thing, babe."

Scarlet doesn't seem to react to my little nickname. Maybe she doesn't mind, or maybe she's just so caught up in whatever bullshit her aunt told her that she's not really paying attention.

The drive to her place isn't what I expected. I was actually hoping she'd start telling me a little bit more about herself, but she stayed quiet the entire way there. Looks like I won't be getting laid tonight.

"Thanks for the ride, Nicolas," she says as she hops out of my jeep, not even bothering to turn around to look at me.

"Nico," I grumble. "Call me Nico."

Surprisingly, she turns around. "I know you really wanted to stay at that party, Nico, but I'm glad you decided to help a girl out instead. That was really sweet of you."

Sweet? I guess I can work with sweet.

"I'll see you at school next week."

"Uh, wait!" I'm not giving up yet. "Let me give you my number. If you need a ride," I quickly scribbled my cell phone number on the back of an old receipt. "If you need a ride, or anything, just call me. Anytime."

She hesitates taking the piece of paper. It was as if she was mulling over the idea, seeing whether I was worth the effort. Eventually, though, she walked back and took the paper. Then she smiled and headed inside her house.

I can't wait for spring break to be over.


"Well, why would he just stop talking?" I did the best I could to not sound upset, but I don't think I was hiding it very well. "If you didn't do anything, then he wouldn't have locked himself in his room." She didn't say anything after that.

God, I hate my aunt. She thinks she's doing the best she can, but she's failing miserably. She can't even take care of herself. If she really wanted to help, she could start by putting down the bottle of vodka.

I hustle up the stairs toward my brother's room. My brother…he's had a hard life for as long as I can remember. He's younger than me, fourteen, but life hasn't been good to him. Fate is one cruel bitch.

"Madison," I whisper, pressing my cheek to the door. "Madison, it's me, Cassy. You can open the door, now."

I can't hear anything as I wait for him. I know he heard me though, because it got quiet inside the room as soon as I started talking. He was crying again.

Then the door unlocks and pulls back. Madison is staring at me with those big doe eyes of his. He has these gorgeous blue eyes that he somehow always manages to conceal from the world. I honestly don't know how he does it. I would kill for eyes like those, and those long eyelashes…he's beautiful.

I guess that's the problem. Madison is too pretty. He's a boy, but he doesn't really look it. He's just different.

I quickly hug him to my chest, easily wrapping my arms around his small frame. The waterworks have started again. This is going to be a long night. Madison has trouble sleeping when he's like this. It's all because she yelled at him. Stupid bitch.

"Hey, sweetie, how are you doing? Are you okay?" I rub his back.

He doesn't respond right away. Instead, he just continues to hug me around the waist and squeeze tighter.

"Come on, Madison. I'm your big sister. You have to trust me."

Madison takes a few seconds before he peels away from my chest. When he does, he just looks at me, with those big doe eyes of his. I softly brush his wavy hair and kiss his pale cheek.

"Tell me what happened. Please?"

He sniffles twice before rubbing his nose. "Emma told me that I have to go to school on Monday." Emma is my aunt, the bitch. "She said that I can't stay home because people might start to ask questions."

There's something I forgot to mention about Madison. He has this problem. You see, my brother has agoraphobia: a fear of crowds and open spaces. It's pretty severe. He doesn't even set foot outside if he's alone. And, there's more. Remember when I said my brother was different. Well, that's because he's also intersexual, as in he has the reproductive organs of both sexes.

Yeah, I know, it's kind of intense. I mean, I didn't really know how to react when I found out. I was nine. Up until that point, everything had sort of been normal. I mean, he still hated being alone, and we rarely ever went anywhere other than my backyard, but, my parents were still around.

Cancer took my mom about a year after she found out, and alcohol finished my dad off about a year after that. Ever since then, we moved in with my Aunt Emma who's not so far behind in the alcoholic department. I guess you can figure which side of the family she's from.

Madison squeezing my arm brings me back to reality.

"I don't want to go, Cassy. Don't let her make me."

It breaks my heart to see him like this. "Madison, you know I can't do that. I can try to keep her from yelling at you, but even I can't do a thing about school. Believe me, if there was any way to get out of going, I'd do it."

He looks at me with those blue eyes, each filled with tears big enough to drown in, then he just tucks his head to his chest and walks back to his bed.

It's always like this. He's been in an out of schools since kinder. It's just too overwhelming for him. My parents homeschooled him for a while, but that didn't work out. Things only seemed to get worse.

The last few years, he finished fifth, sixth, and seventh grade at six different schools. He would skip school until the truant officer would come by the house. Emma would then have to fill out all this paper work and she even had to go to court one time. Ever since then, she really tried to get him into school and keep him there. It hasn't been going so well.

And because he looks pretty androgynous, they might as well paint a huge bull's eye on his back. The bullying got really ugly in middle school. They threw tampons at him one time. Fucking pricks.

At our other high school, the school year started out well for the first two weeks. He kept to himself and never said a word while he was at school. Then we ran into this creep who overheard me call him Madison. You see, Madison is actually my brother's middle name. His first name is Luke. Luke Madison Monroe. My parents and I always called him by his middle name. At school, though, I thought it would be best if he just went by his first name. He seemed to agree, so we stuck to that plan. That is, until Jeff Green walked passed us afterschool one day.

By the following week, Madison said that people started calling him by his middle name and coming up to him and asking him if he was really a girl. He hid in the bathroom for the rest of the day, but things didn't get any easier. Jeff and some of his asshole friends tried to pick him up since he had missed his bus. I don't know what they were planning, but luckily, I got to him first.

"We still have a few more days until either one of us has to go back to school. Why don't we do something, just the two of us?"

He's lays down on his bed, knees bent and eyes closed. He doesn't answer right away. "I'd like that."

"Okay, how about a movie, tomorrow, or a board game?"

He nods, wanting to smile.

"Let me take a quick shower and then you can come sleep in my room. Okay? And don't worry about next week. I promise I'll work something out."

There's a door that connects to our shared bathroom. I make sure to leave it open. After grabbing a pair of pajama bottoms and a tank top, I make my way to the bathroom. As I'm taking off my jeans, my fingers graze against a small piece of paper in my back pocket.

Nicolas. He's definitely cute, I'll give him that, but he's too young for me. Not to mention he looks rather dangerous. I can tell that he likes me, though. Poor kid. Someone should have warned him that the whole bad boy image is a huge turn off for me. Then again, I bet no one F's around with him. Hmmm…that gives me an idea. It's crazy, but it just might work.


I hate my body. I can't bear to look at myself in the mirror for more than two seconds without wanting to throw up. I'm such a freak.

"Hey, you almost done in there?" Cassy asks from her end of the bathroom. "Your waffles are going to get cold."

I quickly finish drying my hair and open the door so she can come in.

"Hey there, handsome. Looking good," she says, smacking my bottom. I can feel my cheeks blush. It happens every time. I know why she does it, though. She's trying to make me feel better. Trying to call me handsome even though I'm disgusting. I'm not falling for that one, I've seen what I look like naked.

Emma said the first time she saw us standing side by side when arrived at the airport, she thought I was Cassy's twin sister. She knew nothing about us when she took us in. Nothing. Well, she knew that there were two of us.

And after about seven years, she still doesn't know that much about us, actually. Except me, of course. Emma practically knows everything about me. She has my file somewhere. The one from the hospital, from when I was younger. I haven't seen it, but it's supposed to have pictures of me, a lot of pictures, even ones when I was still inside my mother. I was quite the freak show back then.

Once my parents died, Emma never took me to the doctors again. According to Cassy, Emma said she didn't want them treating me like a science project. That sure sounds like a nice thing to do, but Emma is hardly ever nice. I guess that makes me doubt the story. Cassy does too. She thinks that Emma stopped taking me because the hospital wasn't going to be paying her a cent for the study. They were just going to track me and study me until the day I died.

The toilet flushes and I hear the sink faucet turn on. After a few seconds, the door pulls open and Cassy's staring at me.

"What are you waiting for, silly? Your breakfast is probably already cold by now." Seeing her smile automatically makes me smile. I love Cassy so much. I don't know what I'd do without her. She's given up so much because of my condition. I don't think you realize how many nights and weekends we've spent watching movies and playing board games. I'm the king at Clue, but she's pretty deadly at Monopoly. We play for hours, just the two of us. On rare occasions, and I mean rare, Emma joins us. When she's sober of course, which is almost never.

"Don't eat those," she says, taking the plate of cold waffles away from me. "I'll put some new ones in the toaster. Those already look soggy 'cause of the syrup."

"Thanks, Cassy."

"Sure thing, handsome."

I wish she'd stop saying that. Handsome is a word used to describe boys. I'm not a boy, I'm a freak.

"Well what did you decide on? Movie or a game? Or both?"

"Um…I don't know. Whatever you want, I guess?"

"Oooh, don't say that. Now when there's this new movie that just came out, with my favorite actress."

As soon as she utters those words, I feel my chest tighten. She wants to see a new movie. She wants to go to the movies.

"And then there's that other one that looks so funny, but I forgot its name." She still doesn't seem to notice that my legs have frozen. She facing the other way, staring at the waffles as they toast into a nice golden brown.

I hate that I'm this way. Why can't I be normal? Not only am I a freak, but I'm also a coward. God is a cruel, cruel being.

What makes this worse is the fact that my sister is the complete opposite of me. Whereas I can't and don't want to leave the house, I know she dreams of going out with her friends and socializing. It's in her personality.

She does go out a couple of times a month, but nowhere near as many times as she'd like to, I'll bet. People like Cassy aren't meant to be cooped up inside houses. This house is like a prison to people like Cassy. To me, this is my castle.

"Here you go, Madison. Eat up." She sets the plate on the table and then playfully shoves me to my chair. After serving me something to drink, Cassy waits until I take my first bite before reaching over and grabbing the soggy waffles that she had left on the counter.

Cassy tries real hard to eat without looking at me, but my eyes are burning holes in her forehead.

"I like soggy waffles," she says. Liar.

"You told me not to eat them because—"

"I know, I know. But now that I'll already made you new ones, you can't just let them go to waste."

"No, but," I quickly reach out and snatch the bottom one that hadn't been eaten yet, "I can trade you one of mine for one of yours." I put the soggy waffle on my plate and give her one of mine.

She takes it, reluctantly.

"I wouldn't mind another game of Monopoly later," I add.

A smile crosses across Cassy's face. "You know I will destroy you."

I shrug. "Cheaters always find a way."

"Cheat? Me? Hah!" she scoffs. "Never in my life."

"That's not what I heard."

We both start laughing. What makes it funnier than it probably should be is the fact that we both know that's not possible. Aside from Cassy, I don't talk to anyone else. I don't have any friends to hang out with. I don't even have acquaintances. Emma doesn't count, though, because…well, because she's drunk most of the time.

"And how about that movie? Up for a little adventure?" Adventure? More like nightmare. She must have read my face, because she gives me this sad smile. "You know what, I actually forgot that I'm out of cash. I won't be getting paid until next week. I guess that movie will have to wait."

We don't say anything until we both finish eating. I can see her look at me a few times, though, as if she's thinking about me. Judging me, maybe. I deserve it. I ruin everything for her.

You know, one day, I'm convinced that she'll get tired of me. She'll go out, like she did yesterday, to blow off some steam or meet the man of her dreams, and then she won't ever come back. What prisoner would actually return to his cell if you let him leave the facility?

Until that day comes, I guess all I can really do is appreciate every second I have with her. I promise, when she does leave, I won't shed a tear. I'll be glad for her. She deserves to be free.

As for me, I belong in this castle.

Here it is folks. I'd like you all to meet my new baby. And if this is my baby, then 2cute4ya14 is my baby's wetnurse. o_0 okay, enough with the analogies. This is my new story and 2cute4ya14 is my beta. Tehe, that sounds so weird saying that.

This one is definitely going to be more of a challenge to write since I plan on multiple pov. I'm nervous...Having a beta definitely helps relieve some of the pressure. Now I can slack off wehn is combs 2 spllng. oops. lol She's great.

Anyway, I know the concept of intersexual is rather rare in a story, so I hope this doesn't get any flack for whatever reason. Remember, lgbT. LGB'T'

If anyone has any questions about the story or characters or whatever, don't be shy. Anonymous comments are accepted. PM if you're too shy.

Please read and review.