i don't inspire anyone with my words. i'm not a proper poet nor am i a renowned writer. i don't "carefully conceal" my absolute truths in my metaphors: i use them just because. i'm not gifted nor wise nor extraordinary. i'm not a saint nor a sinner, not quite in between either. i don't exist outside of terms and phrases, i rest within them and they keep me company. this is not a justification nor is it my defense. this is me stating the truth. this is me laying bare my mind and the ideas (some scary some not) lurking within its corridors. not my heart, i've given it away already, as happens in the numerous sappy love stories that very rarely end up badly. just my luck. but i digress. because i'm stating the truth, my absolute truths tucked away safely in my head, i beg you to turn away. turn away. don't answer me, don't try to change me with your lace whispers and spidery touches, don't carry the smell of new and polished and revised to me. it disgusts me, i detest it; it leers at me, i fear it. it kills the old and withered in me, the experiences and tears and laughs i gathered from many a-places. i want them to stay. i don't want change. because this is my truth, my absolute truth. i don't inspire anyone with my words. words inspire me, words of others and sometimes my own, mingling together, creating anew. that new, that change doesn't frighten me. because change is not scary only when it's on the crumpled pieces of paper blotted with the blackest ink.