she looks young, vulnerable, staring at me
from behind that glass. sometimes i think
she never grew up, sometimes i think she's still
a little girl, trapped in the shell of someone else.
she grew up in hell, sicksick daddy
locking her inside her own head. momma looking
the other way because she didn't
want to believe in her own mistakes.
now that he's not here anymore she's
taken over the torture chamber; starves herself,
makes herself bleed poetry because she
thinks she deserves it.
she doesn't really remember what it's like
to love yourself. she's too busy being
brutal, hateful, ugly to her body to even try.
she took daddy's lessons to heart, i think.
but even she didn't realize just how deep he
wormed his way into her mind. cause when she looks at me
through the glass it's his eyes i see,
his words tattooed across her forehead.
FAILURE. REJECT. WORTHLESS.
but i don't want to see her like that, i want
to love this little girl. i just don't know how.
someone, please god someone, help me
learn to love the girl i have become.