I tapped on the large plastic cage to try to get my hedgehog's attention, but he was too busy playing with the bedding. My eyes focused on the suitcases behind Buster's cage and I soon realize I will no longer live here. Realization hit me and it brought a whole cloud of mix feelings that compress my chest too forcefully. I can't believe it. I took a good look around the house, taking in all the good and bad memories in every room. I adore this house, what a shame I have to leave it all behind. I plopped down on to a chair as I continued waiting for him to get home; I wanted to get this over with already. The more time I spend sitting in this dining room, the more time I think about not leaving him. I needed to do this, not matter what.

Buster was rolling around in the shredded bedding, some clumps getting stuck in between some of his spikes; I couldn't help the small smile that found my lips. This little creature is the only thing keeping me from pitifully breaking down, even before Nate gets home. Sadly enough, his face popped up in my mind along with new "business partner" Maria. Emphasis on the quotation marks. For the last year I've been out shined in my own fiancé's life by this… unrealistic, stunning, super model. She's so damn perfect with her Victoria Secret body, long wavy black hair accompanied with big moonlike green eyes and dimples. I was easily hidden behind her, my looks were almost the exact opposite of her. I'm a petite thing with a shapeless body, my eyes were small brown puddles and my hair was a curly disaster. She didn't even need to try to steal Nate away from me; he just followed right behind her, dragging his jaw along with him.

Since she came along I hardly had any time with him. He's always stuck with a "project" that normally drifts into the wee hours of the morning. I see him every few days and our conversations consist of him telling me that he can't stay long. I wasn't the main women in his life anymore; his lunch breaks, vacation days, and holidays were dedicated to Maria. There's no point for me to even be in his life, he effectively pushed me out of it. But I still loved him so I stayed, like a stupid person would.

My face drooped into a pout as I continued to think of how incredibly happy my Nate was with someone else. But I was quickly torn away from the thought by the loud creaking sound our front door makes when someone opens it. He's home. My heart was racing and I was becoming anxious. My palms were sweating, my chest was slowly constricting together once again and my heartbeat was thumping in my ears. I didn't want to do this. I watched as his lean body entered the kitchen and I waited to see when he noticed the house was dead.

He opened the fridge and seized a water bottle, "I can't stay long, Maria wants us to uhm schmooze with some of our favorite clients. I don't know when I'll come home but she's waiting outside so-" he turned to face me and finally noticed the two bulky upholstered cases on the dining table.

"Uh, are you going somewhere and why did you take Buster down here?" he confusingly asked as his brows scrunched together. I always thought he looked cute when he was so jumbled up. Heh.

"I-I can't do this anymore Nate," I spoke delicately as I observed his professional appearance. His usual shaggy dark hair was slick back and his lanky body was well dressed in a suit polished with a white tie I bought him. He used to wear that tie during business trips because it reminded him of me. Sweet huh?

"Do what?" he asked in a firm tone as he straighten his posture and locked his blue eyes with me. It was quite intimidating to feel him stare at me since it was the most intimate thing we have done in months. It was weird to me; I wasn't use to it anymore.

I gulped looking away from him, "I'm moving into Eliza's apartment, most of my things are already there. I just wanted to say bye face to face, a letter is quite cold."

"Are you fucking serious Alison?" he spoke louder as he walked over to the opposite side of the dining table and aggressively slammed his hands onto the counter. I forgot to mention that Nate is easily angered.

"Yes." I answered shortly; I wouldn't even think that he'd care if I did leave. I thought he'd run out of the house the second I told him and get hitched with Maria.

"Tell me one damn reason why you should leave! You're always such a dramatic bitch.." he froze when the last word slipped out of his mouth and his malicious facial expressions dropped, "I didn't mean that babe. I'm sorry." But I didn't care. I was pissed off, I had a shorter fuse than he did and he needed to know what I was going through while he had his fun with his skank.

"You want a reason? I'm tired of being alone in this fucking house all by myself. I'm tired of being forgotten and forced to see if my fiancé ever comes home." I sneered as I glared at him showing that I serious, " and don't even call me babe, you lost all respect to call me anything when you shoved me out of your life and never looked back!"

He was stunned that I spoke to him like that because I never have since the first time I met him in freshmen year. He cleared his throat and tried to pull back some of his anger, "Alison, what are you even talking about. I don't want you to leave? You should know that."

"Oh I forgot you don't realize shit when you're to0o busy looking down Maria's shirt." I snapped as I pushed the chair out and snatched the handles of the suite cases. I just wanted to leave, Maria was waiting for him anyways, and I don't need to prolong this fight.

But he grabbed onto my wrist and crudely heaved me towards him, "Are you serious right now? You're jealously has gotten too far. Stop talking all this trash about Maria, she never did anything to you."

"Nate. I'm leaving you and you're defending Maria. Just think about your priorities," I spat out but I didn't dare wrestling out of his grip. It was useless he was strong and I didn't want to deal with a scuffle right now.

"Drop the suitcases and just talk to me, please. Alison you can't just leave me like this," he sounded genuine and I was surprise about how forgiving his voice became. So I exhaled noisily and let go of the handles.

My wrist was freed and we stood face to face, er well face to chin since he was a lot taller than me. He used to love that about me and always teased me about my height. We were good together. I shook the thought away and glared at him, "You're not in love with me anymore and frankly I think you rather be with her than with me."

"I love you Alison, how can you even say that.." he sounded offended and his eye brows were pushed together again. His face was contorted into a mixture of unhappiness and agony. Suddenly I felt like the bad guy, but I kept remembering those late nights alone in a king size bed. There's no going back to how things use to be now, no matter how I felt about him.

My voice came out feeble, "You never show it anymore. I can't even believe you when you say that to me. I wake up in the morning by myself, I come back from work and the house is a ghost town, and at night I'm eating dinner for two by myself. There's no point for me to be in your life. You made it clear. We, We're practically strangers now."

"Dammit Alison don't cry please, I hate to see you cry over me," he muttered and whipped the tears off my cheek. I didn't even notice I had burning tears racing down my face until he said so. I felt so scrawny, so pitiful. Why did I wait so long to leave?

"I'm sorry. I can change, I promise. Just don't leave me," he said in a drained voice as he held my face. It was so awkward to feel him touch me. This was the first time he has even touched me in so long that I forgot how smooth his palms were.

I dragged myself out of hands, "I need to leave. Okay? You want Maria, I can tell because you look at her the way you use to look at me in high school. Some people aren't meant to last; this is a hopeless cause, Nate."

"Don't say that! I love you! She doesn't mean anything to me. You can't just throw away ten years just like that," he started to plead and I never seen him this frantic before. And looking at his eyes and how glossy they were becoming I wanted to kiss him and pretend nothing ever happened. But I wasn't going to.

The tears started rimming my eyes again as I spoke louder, "Stop making this harder on both of us. Why are you forcing someone to stay in your life if you don't even love them! You aren't happy with me! You aren't! I'm making this so easy for you! You can be with Maria and be happy with her and have her fucking kids! All I want is for you to finally be happy with someone you deserve! I'll leave your life without a damn trace… just let me leave. Please."

Before I could even think, Nate wrapped his arms around me and he shoved my face into his shoulder. Ugh I'm so pathetic! I was supposed to keep calm and get out of here with ease. But now I keep crying hysterically and desperately clutching onto his jacket trying to bring him closer. Tears were spilling out of me now, all those months I should have been sobbing burst out of me in one single moment. I really wished he loved me the way he used to, I love him so much.

"Baby stop crying please. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I can change. I fucking promise you, just don't fucking leave me. Alison I love you, I love you so much. Please." His voice was loud in my ear and I can feel his warm breath on my neck. I can hear the grief in his voice and the more he spoke the harder I bawled. I wanted to hear all these things months ago, it was too late now. The damage was done.

I forced myself to drop my arms from him but he just tighten his grip around me, "Ali? You still love me don't you? I don't know what I would do without you; you can't just leave me here."

His voice was shaky and I could feel my shirt becoming wet, it was breaking my heart to see him like this. I only saw him cry this hard once in our whole entire relationship, and it was when we had a big fight in sophomore year of college. I promised myself to never make him feel like this ever again after that.

Nate let go of me and looked down at me and his eyes where light grey now, "I'm so stupid. I-I admit it. I had a crush on Maria, she was just… different. And, and I thought if I could just spend some time with her I would see if anything I ever felt for her was something I should look into. I didn't know. I wasn't thinking dammit"

"So you were cheating…" I felt like someone slapped me in the face. It was different feeling from accusing and then knowing. I always knew that all those 'business things' weren't real, but I decided against it for my own sanity. There was always hope in my heart, but what he just stated crushed every ounce of it.

"No! I've only kissed her once. I never acted on my feeling," he took my cheek in his hand, "Cause of you! I love you more than anything. I always will. It's just that… I don't know what I was doing. I was going to decide if-"

I cut him off, " You had to think about it, you had to be with some other girl just to know if you really wanted me Nate! That's not love! Stop fighting this, let me leave. Let me leave so you can be with her already! Why are you doing this to me?"

"I can't just let go of you Alison. You're the love of my life" he looked at me with a painful expression. Slowly, I took off the engagement ring and grabbed his hand from my face and dropped the golden band with an accent of a small diamond into his palm

"Give it to someone you want to be with. I love you but I just can't take it anymore." I murmured with tears racing back down to my chin. I was looking at the ring that symbolized so much of what Nate and I were. We fought through the drama of high school, we made it through years of long distance during collage, and we fulfilled our dreams of owning our own house. The ring was the next step for us, to finally be this happy married couple, to have kids of our own and finally grow old together. To live the high school sweet heart dreams. And I just gave it all that back to him.

He was staring at me in disbelief, "Can't you just think about this? Can you just give me a week to show you that I love you? Please."

"Everything else that we split the cost on just keep it. I don't need it. My house key is on the bed. Everything else that I own was cleared out," I said clearly with a low steady voice. I was ready to leave; I was ready to finally be happy again. But even so I can feel that aching pounding in my chest and that nonstop tightening around my head as if someone was physically harming me.

He just gawked at me with a face I couldn't even bare to look at without wanting to take back everything I said. I love him so much and I could never forgive myself for hurting him like this. I never will, no matter if he hurt me more. In the end I still love Nate, and I will always be in love with him. All I needed to do is get away from him. To never come back and never torture him with this pain ever again.

"One last kiss?" he sounded so small when he spoke, his eyes tinged with red. I couldn't help it; it was the last time that I'll ever be with Nate again. So I pressed my lips against his for the last time. He still gave me that burst in my stomach when I kissed him, even now.

He held onto the small of my back and his lips were very soft and gentle. A small kiss to end it all. He put his forehead to mine and gave me another peck before mumbling, "I fucked up so bad. I will always regret this, my love. You're the one I should have kept. You're the one I should have been with. I'll always feel like that. I love you. I love you so much and I'll always will. Please remember that okay? I'm always going to be here for you. Come back to me anytime. I meant it when I said forever."

He let go and whipped away the tears forming in his eyes again. I said in a flat voice, feigning my calmness, "Nate, please promise me one thing. After this- be happy. Fall in love with Maria, and never let her go"

He didn't say anything as he handed me my two suitcases on the floor. I grab ahold of Busters cage under my arm and took the suite cases from him. In a grieving silence I walked out of the house with him following right behind me, nothing heard from him but random sniffles from him. Every time he did so my frown deepened. I hate myself.

Maria's black bug was in our driveway and her flawless face was shocked when she saw us walk out. I ignored her and loaded everything into my beat up CRX that Nate helped me fix up back in senior year of high school. I turned around to see Nate fiddling with the ring and he gave me a small wave as I got into the car. I wanted to break down again but I can't or else I'll never leave this place. Quickly, Maria was by Nate's side and I took a good look at a picture-perfect couple. My chest officially twisted and was beaten into a pulp at the site. I pulled out of the driveway; I hope they're happy together. I really do hope so.