when i wake up, i say no words.
i silently stare at the ceiling,
a small tear in the window mesh,
shadows of feet under the door,
sometimes i can hear someone near
speaking muffled conversations
maybe with someone they love,
i'd like to think it true.
when i wake up i don't feel real.
i need to replay the last day in my head,
i spend solid moments thoughtlessly staring
into mirrors, not a motion, just confusion,
is that really what i look like?
is that how i appear to everyone else?
maybe it's just the lighting.
i bet natural light is much better.
i wonder, if i asked someone,
what they would say.
when no one is around,
i sometimes forget i'm alone.
i just start believing they never existed.
the world never seemed that big to me,
somehow the horizon was lying,
it was just a convex projection,
built to make me feel small,
to feel part of something larger.
but i feel like every star was built for me.