I'm sitting alone. It's cold. I feel empty. Like something stole all the warmth inside my heart and replaced it with pain. The rain thunders down and washes away my unseen tears. I curl my legs up and hold myself. Alone. I was never completely alone. Never alone.
He never showed.
The tiny droplets crash against my skin, but I can't feel them. I can't feel anything. I'm numb. From head to toe. I feel dead. It's enough. I can't take it anymore. I can't take the pain. I can't take the misery. I can't stand it.
I can't stand my life.
I want to disappear. Forever. Solitude will wash away my pain. Just like the rain did to my tears. It's enough. Stop it. Make it go away.
My eyes are hollow pools of blue. The blue seems to leak from the sides and stream down my face. Alone. I can't feel anything anymore.
I take the small razor from within my sodden jacket. It seems so easy. The blade is sharp. I slowly push it against my wrist. Crimson seeps forth and runs down my skin. The rain washes it away. Just like it washes away my pain and tears.
I sit alone. And now I'll always be alone. Empty. It's all over.
I slowly slide my eyes shut. Allowing death to overcome me. On the street. It's busy, but no one even takes notice of me. Invisible. Even when I am dying, nobody cares.
Why should they?
I don't matter.
The blood runs out and I reach to slit my other wrist. With that simple motion it will end everything. It's so easy to get a life, but so difficult to keep it. Want it. Live it. It's not worth it.
The blade pierces my skin and I blink away my tears.
"Goodbye." I whisper into the night.
I begin to drag the blade across my skin and I feel a large hand stop me. I blink my eyes open. It's a boy. He has long eyelashes and dark black hair that falls around his eyes. He looks at me. He notices me. For the first time.
Someone sees me.
"It's not your time yet." He says, he sounds as if he actually means it.
I look at him and choke out, "Why? Why isn't it my time? Lives are supposed to be shared with people. I have no one."
He shakes his head and my heart beats faster. The blood leaves me faster. But I don't care. I don't care if I die. As long as I hear his next words. "No….I can be here for you."
My tears pour down faster and I smile as the life begins to fade from my body. That was all I wanted to hear. Always. Just those words.
Now, I can die peacefully.