The Hannibal Lecter Christmas Poem


'Twas the night before Christmas,

And all through the house

Not a creature was stirring

For I just ate my spouse.

The only sound audible was the howl the air made

As I was still smelling my wife bake. Cookies.

But the cooking time was lengthy,

And after an hour, I only got angry.

I smothered her with a tissue,

And shut all my blinds,

And I finished eating her at half past nine

Then I knitted a sweater using her hair,

When the sound of a buzzer filled the air.

The cookies are done! And I ate them alone.

Then I picked clean my teeth using a bit of her femur bone.

I'm only kidding! I'm not that sick!

Why would I go out and eat a chick?

It's only a joke; I wouldn't kill Mai...

...Or would I?

Happy Merry Christmas.


This was a poem I wrote in 2009 for Christmas. Why am I putting it up in October? There's probably a reason. Not sure why yet.

Al la fin to the max.