October Burgess wiggled his nose once before taking a deep sip of his pumpkin spice latte. It was so disgusting he wanted to vomit, but it had cost him three dollars and he wasn't one to waste. He sighed, expelling sweet breath. "What if there was a third gender?" He said simply in his crisp British accent.
Taylor Jude "TJ" Tramblay raised a white blonde brow and snorted. He folded his arms across his chest and fixed his turquoise eyes on October's grey ones. "And how exactly would that work? How would they look? What sort of genitals would they have?" TJ tapped his lower lip and grinned. October asked the weirdest questions.
"So they'll have one nipple in the middle of their chest, because they can't have nungas like girls. Course they can't have no nungas like us boys. And they won't have any genitals down there." October was already giggling at the thought of something so ridiculous.
"So where are their genitals?" TJ asked. He briefly glanced out of the window of the bus that they were travelling on. They were going to TJ's house, which was within walking-distance but it was much too cold outside. Luckily the bus was empty so no one aside from the bus driver was over-hearing their conversation.
"In their head," October said as though it was obvious. "They can get pregnant in their heads. They don't have a solid skull like we do. Their head can expand to accommodate a child."
TJ smirked. "So where's their brain?"
"In their pelvis."
"And how to they mate?"
"The guy sticks his trouser-snake in their ear. And a girl can telepathically bang them."
TJ wiped his whole face with his gloved hands before letting out a lengthy sigh. "Giving new meaning to the term mind-fuck." October and TJ shared a round of chuckles before TJ asked; "So how do they give birth?"
"Out of the ear." October tried to hold a straight face while he said this, but his lips were trembling so badly he couldn't help but laugh. Imagine that! A baby coming out of a hole that didn't even stretch! "It's worse then female childbirth."
"I could imagine." TJ rolled his eyes. "You keep forgetting to tell me how their bathroom sign would look and what they're called."
"Their bathroom sign would just be a really big head. To symbolize their way of carrying children. Singular is derx, plural is derxi." October took another sip of the orange drink only to have it come dribbling down his nose.
Once the boys finished recovering from their fits of giggles, TJ clasped his hands together and tried to say with the straightest face he could muster; "At this point, you know this is 'gender' is hardly even human?" Immediately they broke out into another round of chuckles, and tears streamed down their faces.
Through all the tears in his eyes October could see TJ writhing with laughter in his seat, grabbing his stomach which clenched with each chuckle. October's heart felt as though it was filled with helium and it was floating right up to the heavens, bobbing carelessly. There was nothing worth more then TJ to October. Finally he found someone who he could pitch his silly ideas to without being afraid of being hurt. Someone to share laughs with. Someone with whom he could just simply sit with and feel fulfilled. Right there in that moment, nothing mattered beyond the windows of the bus.
I've actually had this conversation with one of my best friends. It was so stupid but so funny to us. I wonder if you can guess which position I was in, October or TJ?