Seems like it's always raining-

I'm torn at the seams.

Frightened out of believing-

Because nothing is plausible anymore,

I just sit here, alone

With an incontrollable need to hear people's voices,

To know that I'm not just wasting time

Wasting away from reality.

Words are forever in spiked letters,

Leaving behind the bitter taste

Of alcohol, consumed the night before-

Someone else I could never be for everyone,

I can't change the way my heart beats

I could never piece myself together differently.

Hours spent looking out of a finger print smudged window

The motions of thundering down the track-

Sends me to sleep, for me to wake up seconds later

Wishing I could lie in frost stained grass

Hearing only the lies I feed my selfish subconscious.

I'm a health hazard to myself:

That's all I will ever be,

Chemical reactions contrasting against my nightmares.