Seems like it's always raining-
I'm torn at the seams.
Frightened out of believing-
Because nothing is plausible anymore,
I just sit here, alone
With an incontrollable need to hear people's voices,
To know that I'm not just wasting time
Wasting away from reality.
Words are forever in spiked letters,
Leaving behind the bitter taste
Of alcohol, consumed the night before-
Someone else I could never be for everyone,
I can't change the way my heart beats
I could never piece myself together differently.
Hours spent looking out of a finger print smudged window
The motions of thundering down the track-
Sends me to sleep, for me to wake up seconds later
Wishing I could lie in frost stained grass
Hearing only the lies I feed my selfish subconscious.
I'm a health hazard to myself:
That's all I will ever be,
Chemical reactions contrasting against my nightmares.